Monday, May 2, 2011

So Graduation.

I started writing this big, long, sentimental post about graduation, but then I decided that no one wants to read that crap. Plus, my blog has gone up like 10 sentimental points in the last year, and I can't allow that any longer.

Instead I am going to summarize and say, WAHOOOOOOO I'm home from Washington, D.C. and could not be happier about it, I'm moving back to Provo....any day I guess (I can't get enough of St. George for the time being), and I need a job.

Oh, and my cousin Nicole got married the day before graduation, and then, well, I graduated. Two days of ceremonies, reunions with besty friends, and a brief moment with President Cecil O. Samuelson, that homeboy of mine. Graduation was lovely- everything that I could have hoped for. I was sad to be graduating, but I've realized that if I am not forced to move on from something, I won't do it on my own. I just like to hang on to things too much. AND, I'm going to be a BYU alumnus forever, and what could be better than that? So I'm happy.

And now I've been in St. George for about two weeks, and it's fantastic. Get a load of the weather down here!!!! HOLY. I drive through town and I giggle about how great it is.

So here are some pictures:

The beautiful couple--- and my Uncle Mike doing the ceremony. Doesn't her hair look amazing?

I caught the bouquet. For the first time in my life. Please tell me that's a sign. haha.

My history teaching practicum friends. It was a blast to catch up with them-- we exchanged student teaching horror stories.

Jen and Annaka-- two of my history pals. YAY diplomas!

I have a lot of sisters now.

tiptoeing through the tulips. reference, anyone? It's worth about 10 bonus points.

Right after  Rachelle and I took our normal-posed picture, we fell into hysteric laughter over my grandma's picture-taking habits. I like this picture better than the normal one.

O, Cecil. And look at the Mrs. She's looking away.

Oh my, this sign. I couldn't resist snapping a picture.

The adorable graduate. In her flattering hat.

So this awesome newly-married cousin of mine came to my graduation! Two days after the wedding!
I think that's it. And word to soul roommates: if you have a good copy of that picture we took at the end of commencement, send it my way. Por favor.

Loves.

Friday, April 29, 2011

O Dixie We Love Thee

So I know I have a lot to catch up on, and don't worry, there are great posts in the works. But this post demands immediate attention.

You all know how much I love my alma mater, Dixie High School. I have school spirit steaming out my ears (still, after 5 years).  Many of you also know about a lovely little tradition called the Bucket Run.

It's done once a year, on the Friday of "D Week," also known as, "D Day." Other D Day events include class olympics, a senior showoff talent show, and the ceremonial annual painting of the "DIXIE" on the Sugar Loaf (a red mountain just up from the Boulevard in St. George). Only the "Diamond D's" get to paint the Dixie. And you can guess that I was one of those lucky few.
me being lowered over the cliff.. to paint

So the Bucket Run is a relay race. Kind of. There's only one team. The current senior class competes with all senior classes before them. In 2006, when I was a senior, the record had just been beaten by the class of 2005 the year before. The race starts at the high school and goes up Main Street to the aforementioned Sugar Loaf. At the bottom of the mountain, there is some sort of device built by the current senior class to get the bucket to the top. In theory, the bucket holds the paint that will be used to paint the "Dixie." Within the last 40 or so years, though, they started using the same bucket every year, and just left the paint out. It was heavy and slowed people down. So they still use the same bucket and it's a duct taped and trashed. But so historic, right?
The following video is the 2006 Bucket Run. Yes, those are my classmates. Aren't they cool? ha.



Anyway, that's a little bit of the background.

This year is Dixie High School's centennial year. That makes this year's Bucket Run the 100th. For the Centennial Bucket Run, they did things a little bit different. First of all, they've had to update the route a little bit. A new road to the top of the hill was built, and we were able to maintain the old one for the past couple of years to maintain the integrity of the Bucket Run, but with the 100 year mark, the administration decided that it was a good time to give it up (which is sad, but you move on). But, with the new route, there has to be a new record. That means that the class of 2005 record stands-- and the 2011 Bucket Run sets the new record.

The second change is that the class of 2011 still did their thing, but running alongside them was a Bucket Run team of alumni. Yep, you guessed it. I. ran. the. Bucket. Run. Today. TODAY. I didn't run it when I was a senior because I'm, well, not a runner. I don't really run. They basically had try-outs and practices and it was all intense and despite my school spirit, I couldn't bring myself to participate and ruin it for everyone because of my incompetence. All the track/cross country/soccer/football people ran. You know, you have to be serious about these sorts of things if you want to claim the title (which we didn't anyway).

So I made my brother come with me. I picked him up this morning a little before 6, we met up with all the alumni (there were only about 33 of us), and then got in trucks to be dropped of at our spots along the relay. And I was SO nervous!!! What if I dropped the bucket??!?! WHAT IF?

Luckily, I didn't. I ran really hard (but probably not very fast), and was a little queasy after.

And you know what? We totally trashed the class of 2011. By like 18 seconds (I promise that's a long time). Poor high school kids. Beaten by mighty Dixie alumni. I was on the alumni team, and we STILL won. But do you know what that means? I was a member of the Bucket Run team that currently holds the record. I am a Bucket Run record holder. And honestly, not a lot of people can say that!!!
Me and brother-- on the top of the Sugar Loaf. Isn't my city beautiful? You can even see the "D" in the background.

After the race was over, we all met up on the Sugar Loaf-- and both teams got in a circle and sang our beloved high school hymn together ("O Dixie We Love Thee"). Precious moment.

I rock. The Bucket Run rocks. Dixie High School rocks. Yay 100 years of the happiness that is DHS.

And because I know you want more information on Dixie's centennial, you can go to the blog: http://dixie100.blogspot.com/. There is an awesome "This Day in Dixie history" calendar that shows events at Dixie High School from the past 100 years. I just want to shower presents upon whoever took the time to create this blog, because it is a masterpiece. 

Friday, April 8, 2011

1 week

I'm coming home a week from tomorrow. I'm not even going to try and explain how crazy that is.

But I have some randoms for today.

1. Casey Abrams, I knew that American Idol was going to deliver for me this year, but I didn't think it would be in the beardy, 19-year-old, and awkward form of you. (See "Your Song" from last week or "Have You Ever Seen The Rain" from this week.



2. I had a nightmare last night that caused me to-literally- yell out in anger and frustration. It woke up my roommate. She asked me if I was okay--- and then asked for an explanation of the dream. So I had a dream that my sister, Elise, was giving me a haircut, and she did a great job. But then my mom (whose hair salon we were in [sidenote: my mother is not a hair dresser and does not own a salon]), said she needed to fix the layers up a bit. So she did, and then I went into the back of the salon to look in the mirror and get a drink of water. I drank out of the sink and then looked up and gasped. My hair had been chopped to my chin. I immediately started hyperventilating and I couldn't speak right. My words came out in small shrieks and whispers-- no actual voice was coming through (because I was asleep, obviously), and I was SO frustrated because my Mom and Elise had not been alerted to my panic-- I wasn't loud enough. And so I finally YELLED, pointing to my head, "WHAT IS THIS???!!". And that's when I yelled out loud and woke myself, and my roommate, up.


(I've been a sleep talker for as long as I remember. All of my roommates, friends, cousins, and siblings have stories. This event, though, has caused me to think a bit deeper about my sleep talking habits. I did a little bit of research. Apparently sleep talking can either be caused by serious disorders (I think we can rule that out), or by stress, depression, fever, sleep deprivation, day-time drowsiness, and alcohol. Stress? check. Sleep deprivation? check. Day-time drowsiness? check.  But all of those things haven't existed consistently my whole life. There must be something wrong with my brain. Maybe I'm like the guy on Phenomenon. Or maybe I'm just one of those people who sleep talks because she can't ever say as much as she wants to during the day).

3. A federal government shutdown is imminent, which means that the Cherry Blossom festivities I have been looking forward to this weekend will most likely be canceled. Poo on disagreement in Congress. The Constitution is hanging by a thread ya'll. Jk. haha But seriously.

4. I love talking to people who know me well. It is so draining to have to explain all the weird things I do to everyone around.

Example 1: In the mall yesterday, I was talking to Moe on the phone. I told her about some stuff I was looking at. She asked if I was going to buy anything. I said, I want to, but probably not, because, "you know how I do." She said yes, and we moved on. She knows that I have to try things on and think about them a lot before buying anything. But I didn't have to say any of that. And I didn't have to hear any comments about how weird that is.

Example 2: 2 days ago, while chatting to Meghan on the phone, my roommates suddenly alerted me to the fact that American Idol had started and the first contestant was singing a Michael Jackson song. I was off the phone very easily in approximately 3 seconds. A quick "Michael's on American Idol" and an "okay bye" was all the exchange necessary. She understands that these are two of the most important things, and all stops for them.

I'm just so excited to live with people again who will be expecting to go and do something fun on Friday night with me. Things just work better that way.

Until next time,

Audge

Tuesday, April 5, 2011

April Showers bring May flowers (Cherry Blossoms in particular).

The District of Columbia is farther from my beloved St. George than I thought. In Washington, there are 39.9 inches of precipitation annually. In St. George there are 8.7 inches. I much prefer the latter. Rainy days=cloudy, sunless, and unhappy days--- and they mean that your shoes and socks and pant bottoms get really wet, and then they stay really wet and cold all day. It's very rude, actually.

But the showers bring the flowers, and I'm already seeing the affects.

So I had some adventures this weekend. It was the first time in 3 weeks that I actually was able to get out and do something on the weekend. The three weekends prior I spent all my time grading, planning lessons, and working on the dreaded teacher work sample. But because my student teaching career is quickly coming to an end (yes.), I have a little more time on my hands, and the weather (despite the loads of rain) is getting better (yes! again).

So I'm starting to enjoy myself a little more. The sad part about the new freedoms is that I am suddenly just about out of money. It's too bad I spent it all during the cold, rainy months, when the other thing to buy was consolation food. Consolation food is very, very bad on so many levels. For one, it makes you fatter. For another, it's still makes you fatter. Third, it's actually kind of expensive (Tom and Jerry's. How can they justify selling those tiny cartons for like $5 a piece? It's inhumane. But people like me buy them). Fourth, now I don't have money for the fun stuff, which is stupid. But whatevs. I have less than two weeks (WAHOOOOO) left, and then I'll hopefully be home and have a job. I can't WAIT to make money again.

So anyway, this weekend. It was a blast. Most of the time.

On Saturday morning I slept in (I hate getting up at 6:30 in the morning. I swear, it will be the death of me), and then me, Julie, and Angie went to a National's game!! The season opener was last week. I love baseball games. I should say that again with more enthusiasm, I LOVE BASEBALL GAMES!!! They mean summer and happiness and sunshine and more happiness. And cute boys in baseball uniforms.

So we bought our tickets and found our seats, and it was sunny and lovely and fun and THEN.

In an instant, the weather shifted to a TORNADO. Well, it might have been a hurricane.

One second there was laughter and cheesy music to be heard, and the next: people were screaming. The clouds had shifted instantaneously and let out a down pour of HAIL. Pelting hail and high MPH winds. We cowered in our seats (screaming ourselves), and once we emerged, the field was covered in a giant tarp, and the entire stadium was evacuated. No. Joke. The marquee had a delay message. We went behind the stadium to get out of the awfulness, and then after waiting in the cold and wet for about 20 minutes decided to bail. It was no longer worth it to wait for the game. This is what I'm talking about when I complain about the rain and awful weather in Washington. THIS is what I'm talking about.
The baseball field before the chaos
The baseball field AFTER. Big difference? I think so.
Julie and Angie DURING the chaos.
Who else's mascot is a giant Abe Lincoln head?
So we went to Eastern Market instead, which is one of my very favorite places. Most of the booths and shops were closed because of the weather, but we managed to buy some delicious mini donuts from a guy. And we found lunch at Good Stuff Eatery. Never has a hamburger and fries tasted so good.

That night we made our way to the waterfront between the Potomac and Anacostia Rivers. The Cherry Blossom Festival people sponsored a street party thing and fireworks. This evening event combined like 8 of my favorite things. 1) fireworks. 2) boats on the river. 3) glow sticks and festival people. 4) twinkly lights on the boats that were on the river. 5) adventures climbing over fences. 6) attempting to take pictures of said fireworks (I have still never been successful at that. And why do I even try?). 7) ice cream at Thomas Sweet in Georgetown following the firework adventure. 8) well, I still really loved the boats on the river.
These are the perfect seats me and Angie found to watch the fireworks from.

Summary of the evening on the river with the fireworks: it was a dream.

Note to future husband: I would like to be proposed to on a boat. In the middle of a river (or the ocean). During some fireworks. That would be nice.

The next morning I woke up to beautiful sunshine; the likes of which have rarely been seen since last fall. I took advantage of the loveliness and went on a long walk by myself before conference (don't worry, I still slept in until like 9:30. Conference wasn't until noon out here). I rode the metro to Arlington Nat'l Cemetery and then walked across the bridge to the Lincoln Memorial, all the way around the Tidal Basin, and then to L'Enfant Plaza to catch the train back home. I saw the Cherry Blossoms up close for the first time, and note to reader, they do not disappoint. They were gorgeous. There were A LOT of tourists, but I dealt with them-- I walked quickly and jumped out of many a picture. In total the walk was about 3.5 miles, and I loved every second of it. I talked to my mom and Moriah on the phone but mostly I just enjoyed the blossoms. And I am seriously in love with the Jefferson Memorial. I mean, I have been for years, but anyway.
Beautiful Arlington

I stuck my camera through the fence. This is the construction site for the new Martin Luther King, Jr. memorial, to be completed December 2011. (YIP!)

Snow on some random trees? No! They're cherry blossoms!

Hey TJ. I can see you poking out in there.

I loved the combination of Cherry Blossom and Willow. (fyi, see the tourists? They were swarming)

Addendum to the note to future husband above: How about a proposal in the Jefferson Memorial, during some fireworks, after rowing a romantic little boat across the Tidal Basin? And don't forget the twinkling lights.

So I had a good weekend. And this weekend is going to be awesome too. And then the next weekend (drumroll please), I'll be flying home, and saying goodbye to this amazing city for a third time.

It's going to be great.
And look out BB12. I've officially purchased Dani's contract. Save a kitchen cupboard for me, I'm coming home!

Wednesday, March 30, 2011

Call Me Crazy.

So... I've been listening to Prince... lately.

I know you never thought I'd go there... I always knew I would.

Especially since the discovery of "Purple Rain" in 2009. Yep, that song for sure started it.

Some lyric gems (this is about 60% of why I listen):
  • From "Let's Go Crazy": (spoken) "...We are gathered here today... 2 get through this thing called... life." haha. So profound.
  • "I Would Die 4 You": "I'm not a woman. I'm not a man. I am something that you'll never understand." Yes Prince. You are. No one will ever understand.
  • "Kiss": "Act your age (not your shoe size)... not your shoe size." If I acted my shoe size I would be 7 and a half. I guess Prince doesn't like 2nd graders.
Anyway, I just thought I would share my current music listening habits with ya'll. I think it's a sure sign that I'm doing well. My crazy music habits are indicative of my well-being, I believe.

Saturday, March 26, 2011

Once Upon A Time...

... There was a girl named Audrey. She had a best friend named Rachelle.
(look out! This is a really long and cheesy post!)

Audrey and Rachelle first met at the tender age of 14. They were in two straight classes together at Dixie Middle School and bonded daily during their walk to the seminary building across the street. Audrey thought Rachelle was cool because she had a cell phone. Also, she always admired Rachelle's shoes. Rachelle was really smart and did gymnastics, and Audrey wanted to be just like her.

When the two of them were 15 they took a theater class together. Mr. Saxton and the loony drama kids only brought Rachelle and Audrey closer. They competed in the regional and state drama competitions together doing a scene from the "The Odd Couple." It was a really stupid scene. It required Audrey to wear frumpy mom sweats and Rachelle to squelch and scream like an out of control loony bird. Audrey and Rachelle practiced in the basement of the Doxey's house and the squelches could be heard in the upper floors. And when they competed, they somehow found it necessary to carry around like 5 folding chairs and 2 black blocks from room to room as props in their scene. However, dragging the furniture through the hallways at Hurricane High School was nothing compared to the creepy on-looking Hurricane kids. Audrey and Rachelle left the competition with a few mediocre competition scores in addition to confirmed rumors of Hurricane in-breeding.

At the end of their sophomore year Rachelle called Audrey one day with an invitation to go boating. Audrey replied with an exclamation in the affirmative, and Rachelle commented, "I have decided to make you my designated boating buddy, if you don't mind." Audrey didn't mind. She loved spending time with Rachelle, and well, she loved boating.

Several boating trips ensued. Lots of tubing, attempted wake-boarding (on Audrey's part), cliff jumping, more tubing, and an extraordinary amount of merriment accompanied the two.

Senior year, Rachelle and Audrey were in choir and drama together. Audrey was nervous to sing in front of Rachelle because of Rachelle's musical talents ;). Rachelle was somehow able to teach Audrey how to sing alto, and they sat together all year, laughing at the juniors who were really excited about choir and grades (guess who). Oh, those were the days. They also performed in Fiddler on the Roof together; Rachelle playing the lead (because of her talents, of course), and Audrey playing an ensemble role that allowed her to be involved, but still gave her plenty of time to do her homework in the hallway during performances. There was one scene, however, that Audrey and Rachelle were able to participate in together. During Sunrise, Sunset, Audrey and Rachelle always made eye contact and got a little teary when they imagined the show being over, and high school being over, which would eventually lead to their separation.

Rachelle and Audrey also joined each other on several school trips that year, which included the famed Choir Trip, the RASK Urban Experience Trip (of which Rachelle was in charge), and the senior trip to California. Each trip brought the friends closer together. On the Choir trip Rachelle shared her mittens her Audrey. On the RASK trip the friends found a random store in the Trolley Square mall that was selling hourglass sand things that looked really awesome. Because of its fascinating nature, Audrey and Rachelle committed a good 20 minutes of their lives to the device. The California trip was an altogether different bonding experience; Disneyland was a blast, but Magic Mountain was a bust. On the exhausted trip home, Audrey and Rachelle texted awkward and coded messages to Rachelle's boyfriend at the time--messages he still probably hasn't figured out (example: "The moon is bright tonight... with freckles." Rachelle, I hope you remember that one). They thought they were too hilarious for words.

After a year of separation while Rachelle attended her freshman year at BYU and Audey stayed at Dixie State, they decided to be roommates at BYU. Rachelle found them a place to live in Provo, and one day, Audrey took a call and left class to give Rachelle her credit card information to get the contract signed. Audrey had not even officially been accepted into BYU yet; but she wanted to live with Rachelle so bad (and she had no doubt that she was going to get in), that she signed a contract anyway.

...And so began a pattern of Rachelle finding housing for Audrey. Every place that Audrey lived at BYU is credited to Rachelle's finding (and in most cases, Rachelle signed the contract for Audrey while she was away).

It is hard to describe the perfection that was Audrey and Rachelle as roommates, but I shall attempt it in list format.

1) Rachelle helped Audrey function in normal society (example: Rachelle made me stop wearing my CTR ring on my wedding ring finger. Go figure) and Audrey helped Rachelle remember the small but significant details of her life (Rachelle: Audrey, did I pass the AP Bio test? Audrey: Yes, you got a 3. (Audrey distinctly remembers sitting at the Doxey's kitchen counter looking at Rachelle's new macbook and calling the AP Board the moment scores were released)).
 
2) Rachelle and Audrey live very independent lives. They both have their own plans and like to do their own thing. Their daily activities varied greatly; they were on different ends of campus, they had different friend group outside of the roommates, and they had different time-consuming jobs. Somehow, though, they were always able to meet up at bed time to settle in at about the same time. Never had either person known such remarkable and entertaining pillow talk. It kept the pair of them up for hours and hours, way past their bed time. They would lay there in the dark and giggle ("well that's just FANTASTIC!!"), and their roommates would complain and bang on the wall. In their junior year, when they didn't share a room, they enjoyed pillow talk time in the living room, looking up at the Christmas lights that hung around the room all year long.

3) Rachelle was really good at telling Audrey all of her problems, particularly boy problems, and Audrey was really good at listening and supporting, but never telling her what to do. Audrey just knew that there were some things that Rachelle had to figure out on her own (like the fact that she didn't actually like that one boy, and that she knew deep down that she was going to break up with him eventually). Rachelle was always really good at making Audrey spill the beans. Audrey is really bad at talking about her honest feelings. But Rachelle was really good at giving advice and making Audrey feel secure. Rachelle was very good at making Audrey feel good about herself. She was very supportive of everything Audrey did. After Audrey got a good grade on her first test at BYU, Rachelle made her a cake to celebrate.

4) Somehow Rachelle has always been very good at reading Audrey and knowing what she is thinking and feeling, even before Audrey knows it. Exhibit A: When Audrey decided not to go on a mission (against her life plan, mind you), she called Rachelle to tell her. Rachelle calmly responded: "I know." Audrey: "WHAT?! Why didn't you tell me??!" (telling would have saved Audrey a lot of stress and effort). Rachelle: because you needed to figure it our on your own. But Audrey, why do you think I haven't purchased housing for the fall? Because I was waiting for you." Oh Rachelle, always the smart, intuitive one.

And so Audrey and Rachelle lived together at BYU as roommates-- as an old married couple-- that relied on each other for just about everything.

In the meantime, they also did all sorts of other fun stuff.

Rachelle showing off her mad cartwheel skills
They took a vacation together to Washington, D.C., which was only the dream of Audrey's life (see post #1 of this blog). The two of them ran (literally) around Washington for 6 days, seeing a lot more than the average tourists do on their first trip to DC. Audrey realized later, on her other trips to DC, that after what she had seen with Rachelle, there really wasn't that much left. That's how much they saw. They got really sore feet and were very, very exhausted, but were also highly entertained by the common and not-so-common attractions: tourist families with matching plaid shorts, the chipmunks that Rachelle refused to recognize as squirrels ("Aren't they the same thing?!"), and the many reflective surfaces around the city that served as perfect photo-ops.

They spent a week in Palm Desert, California and basked in the sunlight (and got really tan), went to the gym and worked out for a surprisingly long period of time (yay 0 elevation) played board games, watched Ironman way too many times, and made fun of Joshua Tree National Park. Oh yes, and they also went to Tiffany's and looked at diamonds. Rachelle loves diamonds, and Audrey has been lucky enough to be exposed to the world of diamonds through Rachelle. Thanks to Rachelle, Audrey is very well-versed in diamond language.

They exchanged books, movies, and TV shows. Audrey and Rachelle love to talk about books. Audrey likes to read books and then make Rachelle read them. They also enjoyed watching Friends, 30 Rock, and the occasional Gossip Girl episode together. They tried not to watch Gossip Girl most of the time, but it was too addicting.

They developed a list of rules for their life that include the Rule of the Evil Hour of 6, the "It's okay to be late for most things" Rule, and the "You don't actually have to eat meat if you don't want to" Rule. The most-often broken rule, I think, is the one that states, "Always go to bed when you're tired, and sometimes, go to bed before you are tired." The two of them are really bad at going to bed when they are tired. See this post for the other rules, if you are curious.


Rachelle and Audrey are no longer roommates. They can't be. Rachelle went off and got herself a man. And she married him. Audrey was left with other awesome roommates and more adventures to have on her own, but she misses Rachelle.

The truth is, Audrey needs that Rachelle. She just does. And she is so grateful for her friendship. And for the fact that Rachelle really knows Audrey. She understands.

Quick list of other things I love about Rachelle:
1. She has a snuggie.
2. She is a super hard worker. She is not afraid to put in the effort to get what she wants.
3. She has a fantastic shoe collection.
4. She asked for Star Trek for Christmas.
5. She has a different color of hair in like every picture she's in.
6. She was really good at getting me to go to the gym.
7. She likes all sorts of random music. Sometimes she's in a Ne-Yo mood, sometimes All-American Rejects. Sometimes country. But she always like Billy Joel.
8. She listens to all my crazy stuff and just laughs at me.
9. She totally appreciates it when I scrapbook roommate stuff. She always wants to see the new pages I make. That makes all the work worth it. :)
10. She taught me how to rinse everything completely before putting it into the dishwasher. And how to use plates all time. Especially for toast. She hates it when there are crumbs on the counter.
11. One time we bought a hot pad for our kitchen together. Just one of them. Just because.
12. She let me drive her car all the way to St. George once- she was in the passenger seat. She needed a break.
13. She often goes along with my crazy ideas-- but she also puts a check on them too.
14. She leaves really, really long phone messages that I actually really entertaining to listen to.
15. She likes to make piles of clothes like I do. And she never got mad at me when my side of the room was a disaster area (as it often was).

So happy birthday, my darling. And thanks for being you.

Wednesday, March 23, 2011

Abandoned

I have abandoned this blog lately. So this post is just to announce that yes, I am still alive. Stressed-out? Exhausted? Over-worked? Homesick? Stronger than before? More dedicated? A better person? All yes. the answer is yes.

Student teaching is hard. I can't say that enough. And for most of this time I've been a student teacher I thought it was too hard. There was definitely an extended period of time that I didn't think I could do it-- and honestly, I think that's the first time in my life that I have thought that. I've always thought that I could do anything- in fact, I've been known to say, "they say you can't do it all. But I can." The trial of student teaching made me doubt the foundations of who I am. I wanted to go home multiple times. So bad. Heck, I still want to go home. I've never been more excited about anything in my entire life- including when Harry Potter 7 came out. I can't explain, and don't want to explain what is so hard about it. But I promise that's it just hard across the board. It's kind of a best-kept secret in the education world. Talk to anyone. Very rarely will you find someone that actually enjoyed their student teaching experience.

The good thing is that I've reached the summit, so to speak. Miley Cyrus's "The Climb," comes to mind. I don't love it. There are moments when I like it. And it's become one of those things that you just have to make the most of and get through. Throughout this semester I've gone from a very negative attitude to a hopeful one. I swear, there has been a serious transformation-- an emergence from a very dark tunnel to a significantly brighter afternoon.

So most of the time I'm just too tired to really think about anything, and then I have to plan another lesson or grade another research paper. It's all-consuming. Student teaching becomes life. Which is fine, except I feel guilty all the time, because I'm in this place that I love, but I don't have the time or energy to enjoy it. And I'm counting down the days until I leave it. I hate that. I love this place. It has brought me so much happiness in the past. But now I associate it with the stress of student teaching and I get a bad taste in my mouth. Is that not awful? Last Friday, though, I went to Georgetown for shopping and dinner with my roommate Julie. And it was a warm, sunny day (just about the first one this year). I was so happy. I remembered why I love this place, and I wanted to stay. So conclusion: I still love the city. I still love being here. I just want to finish student teaching and never think about it again. Ever.

So that's the status of my feelings right now. As of tomorrow after school, I will have exactly 3 weeks until I'm done with this. And two days after that I will fly home to St. George, into the loving arms of my mommy and daddy. And my mom has already promised to make me cinnamon rolls when I get home.

And then I'll be in Northern Utah on April 19th. My lovely lovely cousin Nicole is getting married on April 20. And then I graduate. The next day. Wow. Graduation. And then I think I'm going to live in Provo. For the summer at least.

And then that's where the story ends. That's when the plan is over. I don't know what's going to come next. But you know what? That's okay. At this point I can deal with a couple weeks of chill. A couple weeks of no plans and no pressure. I'll get bored pretty fast, I'm sure. But for right now, I can't imagine anything more awesome.