Woes of the 490 paper that I should have worked harder on.

So it's finally due today. Today is the day. THE day.

I've been waiting for this day since my first semester at BYU when I was being murdered by my History 200 paper and learned that I would have to repeat the experience x10 when I took History 490-- the last history class I would be required to take before graduation. I filled with dread and actually changed my major for a semester to avoid this one class.... the dreaded 490.

Well, I've written a lot of papers since HIST 200 and am no longer scared of writing more than 20 pages in a paper. I've done it multiple times and really, I don't care that much about if my teacher thinks my paper is awesome and worthy of publishing or not. Just don't care. I've stopped associating my success in school with my value as a person and the strength of my character (my habits are much healthier these days).

So I've done minimal work. At this point my paper stands 20 pages with 4 additional pages of bibliography, a total of 63 citations (ridic, I know), one map, and a killer (fine, it's boring) title page. But I think I've produced a pretty good paper. I mean, really, I am excellent at organization, topic sentences, tying in quotes, and analyzing primary sources. My weaknesses lie in being too wordy or making up words. I also like to have really, really long paragraphs. I'm quite long winded if you already couldn't tell just by reading my blog. Also, my conclusion is super cheesy and my introduction is NOT attention grabbing. But it does the job. My historiography is a solid 5 pages but is really just what I gleaned from scanning through my sources, it's hardly an in depth analysis. I know that my first argument is weak. I lack the primary sources. I know that section 2 of my third argument is weak. It actually doesn't tie very well to my thesis. But that's a secret. None of my editors noticed- not even my professor- so I'm hoping it'll slide in the final draft.

My paper is lacking. But I'm turning it in anyway (because it's due in less than 2 hours). I think it's good enough.

But I want to talk about the drama of today a little bit. First, I was up until 3 working on all sorts of homework for my marriage and family class (despite the interesting discussions I ultimately regret taking that class. It's going to shoot down my GPA for the semester simply because I didn't care.) I got up at 8 and came to campus and have been working on my paper ever since (besides an hour at work in Special Collections). Unfortunately for me, I forgot my computer power cord. I had heard somewhere that it was possible to check them out at the library. So, close to noon, when my computer was about to die, I ran up from the first floor (where the serious studiers are) to the third to ask the information desk where I could find a power cord. They directed me to the LRC, on the 4th floor. I ran up those stairs, got the power cord, and then went to the 2nd floor to Dani's locker to get all my books about the Mormon Battalion for my research. I couldn't remember the locker combination. So then I went back to the first floor where I had left my stuff, looked up the combo, plugged in my computer, then went back up to the 2nd floor, went to the bathroom, got into the locker, pulled out my stack of 11 books, and then proceeded back down to the 1st floor where I am now writing this blog post while I should be cleaning up my paper some more so that I can turn it in in less than 2 hours.

I am just ridiculous. And I know I'm being dramatic about this.

But the point is, I'm turning in my paper today. And I could not be happier about completing this enormous hurdle in the process of my education.

edit: It's 1:36pm and I'm about to print of the dumb thing and turn it in. I thought I should save some photos, you know, just to keep the memories of this semester-long saga.

A screen shot of the final product in print preview:

I had to pull out all the post-it notes that I used to mark important things in all my 11 books about the Mormon Batallion. I'm not kidding, probably 200 post-it notes. And those things were my lifeline. They labeled everything. It was surprisingly painful to take the post-it notes out. I had mini heart attacks with each one- small pangs of panic-- it felt like I needed to leave them in there, cause what if I needed to know where something was again??!! To comfort me in this process I listened to Freddie sing, "We Are The Champions" and I felt like a champion.

And that's all.

The End.

Alexander the Great.

So much to love.

Greek History. Professor Peek. Macedonia. Alexander the Great and his amazingness. Check out this letter. Alex wrote it to Darius, you know, the ruler of Persia. But this letter was written and sent AFTER Alex had already conquered King Darius III and his armies at the Battle of Issus. He's just rubbing it in. And demanding respect. Go Alex.

"Your ancestors invaded Macedonia and the rest of Greece and did us harm although we had not done you any previous injury. I have been appointed commander-in-chief of the Greeks and it is with the aim of punishing the Persians that I have crossed into Asia, since you are the aggressors. You gave support to the people of Perinthus, who had done my father harm, and Ochus sent a force to Thrace, which was under our rule. My father died at the hand of conspirators instigated by you, as you yourself boasted to everybody in your letters, you killed Arses with the help of Bagoas and gained your throne through unjust means, in defiance of Persian custom and doing wrong to the Persians. You sent unfriendly letters to the Greeks about me, to push them to war against me, and sent money to the Spartans and some other Greeks, which none of the other cities would accept apart from the Spartans. Your envoys corrupted my friends and sought to destroy the peace which I established among the Greeks.

 

I therefore led an expedition against you, and you started the quarrel. But now I have defeated in battle first your generals and satraps, and now you in person and your army, and by the grace of the gods I control the country. All those who fought on your side and did not die in battle but came over to me, I hold myself responsible for them; they are not on my side under duress but are taking part in the expedition of their own free will. Approach me therefore as the lord of all Asia. If you are afraid of suffering harm at my hands by coming in person, send some of your friends to receive proper assurances. Come to me to ask and receive your mother, your wife, your children and anything else you wish. Whatever you can persuade me to give shall be yours.

In future whenever you communicate with me, send to me as king of Asia; do not write to me as an equal, but state your demands to the master of all your possessions. If not, I shall deal with you as a wrongdoer. If you wish to lay claim to the title of king, then stand your ground and fight for it; do not take to flight, as I shall pursue you wherever you may be."

My favorite part is bolded, btw.

These are the kind of gems that I get to read when I study for my history classes. Can any other type of studying be more fun?
 :)

Sleepy McSleeperson Sleepovers.

This weekend.... I had two last chance ever sleepovers. I am so lucky!

I went home to St. George on Friday afternoon for several events of the weekend:

1) Mallory's family bridal shower. YIP! I loved her family. They are fantastic. And I really love her. It was kind of odd, though, being there. I've never been on the groom's side of things before. They made a movie of the groom answering questions, and whatta ya know, it was MY BROTHER. Odd. But they are adorable, and I'm fully excited for the wedding.

Yeah, sorry, Mom. Your eyes are closed. Eek.

2)Part of that excitement, however, it due to our awesome shiny green groomsmaid (cause that's what we are, I think) dresses. We went to the second fitting on Saturday morning, and I fell in love with the lovely thing. YAY.

3) We made a quilt. My mother likes to make her life WAY more stressful that it actually needs to be. I think I used to have that trait, but in recent years the habits of lazier, happier roommates have rubbed off on me, and I am much more relaxed about over-achieving. So my mom decided that while we were home, we would actually QUILT (not tie) a blanket for Andrew and Mallory. It was very nice thing to do, but not necessary. This would not have been that big of a deal had my mother already had the quilt on the frames and ready to go when we got there. She didn't. She had cut out the squares, only to find out that they needed to be re-cut. I did that while she sewed all them together and grandma ironed the strips, and THEN, we put it on the frames and quilted to our hearts' content (while we watched GC of course) We got about half of it quilted by the time conference got over, so my poor mother darling will have to finish it herself. :( Well, Sugar Doll can help her, I guess. But, it really was a blast. I love quilting with my sisters and mother and grandma. It's a bonding experience. And, by the way, the quilt is gorgeous. I'm secretly like VERY jealous that it's not for me. Mother, I want one.
4) General Conference. Love it. I especially love the idea of casually waking up on Sunday morning with no place to go, and only something to watch and enjoy. It's such a good break (especially when my Sundays have been JAM PACKED with relief society craziness).

5) Sleepover #1. Me and my darling siblings, Stephanie, Andrew, Elise, and Moriah, AND our kind of cousin Celina, had a sleepover in the family room on Friday night. We pulled all the mattresses off our beds and pushed them together in one giant bed, then told each other stories until we fell asleep. It was a last chance sleepover, because, well, Andrew is getting married VERY soon, and although I'm happy about it, I'm still very much freaking out about the whole idea/concept. Marriage is just so BINDING. :) I mean, once it's done, it's done. There's no going back.

6) Sleepover #2. On Saturday night, I had a sleepover with Moe and Jen, my favorite all-time and forever besties in the world. I mean, I have a lot of other besties, but they have been my besties the LONGEST, so that gives them more devotion and laugh points. They are very funny girls, and we had a fabulous time together. This was a very rare opportunity because they are both involved in that one binding marriage thing... And Jenny is going to have a baby, remember? SO, we were only able to have this fiesta because both of their charming and handsome husbands were out of town hunting or camping or something else that boys do. Lucky me, right? I know. We talked forever, went to Dairy Queen (our classic get-a-away. We love that place more than the average ice cream loving group of girls), played games, reminisced about secret high school memories, and giggled until the wee hours of the morning. This is a last chance sleepover because it will only get harder to do this kind of thing 53 days from today when Jenny has her baby.

This weekend I was really lucky to have been able to spend so much time with lots of people I love. It was amazing. And I'm not going to pretend that the warm weather didn't contribute greatly to my happiness.

Please do not note that I am only even wearing makeup in one of these four pictures. I guess it was a good weekend for not getting ready and looking gross too. Love that.

Also, real fast, I have a new initiative in my life. I need to become re-devoted to my schoolwork. Correct me if I'm wrong, but I used to be THE. MODEL. STUDENT. I did. Promise. And somehow, I've forgotten that drive. I've lost that motivation. So now, I am making a commitment to work harder and do better. THE END.

I am officially in love with Hamlet. Not the character, but the play.

I had to read Hamlet for my Shakespeare class. Prior to this recent reading, I thought that the play was very boring and very dumb. But seriously, it's awesome. SO GOOD. And, I'm in love with Zeferelli's film version. It was made in 1990, and Mel Gibson plays Hamlet. He played the character very well, I thought. He seemed a little bit insane, but was also very depressed and brooding. It turned out to be an excellent combination. And Helena Bonham Carter is a BRILLIANT Ophelia. Just the right amount of creepiness when she goes crazy. Altogether, I'm a little to excited about it. I watched the movie last night and finished it this morning, and I'm still haunted by it. You know how some movies just stay with you a while, and you keep thinking about them? Well, Zeferelli's Hamlet did that to me. I would recommend it.

As you can see from reading my post about Octavian and now this one about Hamlet, I am enjoying my studies at BYU, and I have apparently picked the right field. I am altogether TOO enthusiastic about what I learn at school. But that's a good thing, right?

Octavian

Ok, so I'm currently kind of obsessed with the Roman general/dictator/consul/holy one/emperor/political genius/PR master/really really super hot, Octavian. He was the heir to Julius Caesar, as written in Caesar's will. Oddly enough, Octavian isn't even Caesar's son, he is his adopted son. Caesar's only known son just so happens to have a mother named CLEOPATRA, and his name was Caesarion. He was running around in Egypt doing who knows what, so Octavian got the inheritance. Sweet. He was way cooler anyway. By the way, he was supposedly very good looking with piercing blue eyes.

So, Octavian beat out Marc Antony for supreme power in the Roman World by the time he was NINETEEN!!! The Romans loved him so much, they just kept giving him more and more power, and soon enough, through no fault of Octavian's, there was no more Roman Republic, because he was the sole ruler! And everyone loved it! Odd how that works out. The senate even gave him the name "Augustus," meaning, Holy One. So ya, we're talking about Caesar Augustus here. He pretty much made the world peaceful and happy, and there was a lot of art and sculpture and literature and prosperity and games and pretty architecture and poetry, and all the wonderful things in the world. All because of Octavian. Or so the Romans claim. Even if it wasn't all because of him, and it kind of was, it's still really cool to think that because of this peace, it made it ten times more possible for Christ to do his work on earth and for the apostles to travel and be missionaries. So props to Octavian/Augustus.

PS, I swear, that if for some odd reason I have an 8th child, and it's a boy, his name will FOR SURE be Octavian. And he will grow up knowing that he was named after the coolest guy ever!