My Best-Selling Autobiography

I love technologyyyy, but nottttt as much as you, you see....

2012-01-02T11:51:00.000-08:00

I just tried to go to the temple. My first act on the first weekday of the year. Wanted to start things out right. Well guess what. It was closed. Because today is kind of a holiday I guess.

boo.

But then I got to thinking, what about that technology huh? I was talking on a phone in my car. Let's take a trip to pre-cell phone, pre-voicemail, pre-caller ID (I know, what a concept), pre-internet, pre-facebook, pre-laptop computer days. Are you imagining dreadful things? I am.

Imagine trying to date... without any of these things. How in the world is a boy supposed to get a hold of you? What if you are in college, in a dorm room? And you are only there like 1% of the day? (while you are sleeping) And you don't have voicemail, so how do you know he called while you were gone? omg, he would have to actually COME TO YOUR HOUSE to see you. And if you weren't there, he would have WRITE A REAL NOTE TO PUT ON YOUR DOOR!

What if a boy is out of town and wants to contact you-- to remind you that he exists? How is he supposed to go about doing that? We already discussed the ineffectiveness of calling-- you are never at home. He can't text you. He can't email you. He can't write on your wall. He can't gchat with you. He can't comment on your blog. He can't skype you. No facetiming. He can't like something of yours on Pinterest. He can't even send you a facebook message that is private only to your eyes! He can't even mention you in a tweet! He would have to WRITE YOU A LETTER, and it could take WEEKS to get to you! Oh the tragedy of it all!

What if you are driving in your car, or you are out someplace, and YOU need to contact said boy? But you don't have a cell phone. You don't even have some sort of smartphone device that you could use to send him a message in all the billion ways mentioned above. And remember, you are in your car. SO. What are the chances that you are going to remember to call him from your land line by the time you get home? There are at least one million other things to remember at any given moment. What if you get inside the door and you see the kitchen and suddenly you are hungry? But then you have to pee because you see the bathroom? But then you remember that you are SO SICK of wearing the shirt you are wearing and you have to change that very instant? And then that song you listened to in the car is in your head and you HAVE to find out immediately who sings it and what it is called so you can (look it up on iTunes and buy it) run back out to the local record store and buy the single version, because you probably like the b-side too? But then your roommates start talking to you and they all met a boy in class today and he was cute, but he didn't get their number, and now they have to wait until next week to hear from him because that's when they have class next, and they can't even look him up on facebook to add him (to show they are slightly interested) and/or so they can show you how attractive he is because FACEBOOK doesn't exist! And then you realized that your show is starting, and you have to watch is RIGHT THEN because you can't catch it on hulu the next day. It's not going to be instantly streaming on netflix next month. You aren't going to be able to find a weird downloadable copy from some shady website like surfthechannel.net or tv-dome.com (which are both shut down, btw. booooo). You can't even tivo/dvr it!! So you settle down with your dinner, newly changed-into shirt, and flattened bladder to watch, oh I don't know, I Love Lucy, and THEN you remember you need to call the boy. But then you have to wait until a commercial break, but then what if the phone call takes longer than the break? You can't even PAUSE your TV so that you won't miss anything. You can't text said boy and tell him you will call him later, and that if you don't, he can call you after 8pm (when your show is over). So anyway, then you forget to call the boy again by the time the show is over, and the whole process starts over again. And you never call the boy. Because modern technology doesn't exist, and you NEVER get married.

THE END.

WHOA. What a troubled, complex world our parents were raised in. I do have to say, though, that both you and boy have several LEGITIMATE excuses for any lack of- or mis-communication without all of these modern communication conveniences. That is a luxury that us young people of the 21st Century don't have. If someone doesn't text you back within the hour, it is safe to assume that either they, or their phone, is dead. For realsies.

The scenario could also play out like this: you text said boy at a stoplight. The end. OR You call said boy the moment you remember (and you simply turn down your radio, because you have already used that handy app on your phone that identifies songs for you), and you have a lovely chat while you drive home. Then you walk in the door, change your shirt, buy said song on iTunes (takes 3 seconds), use the restroom, pause the show while you are making dinner, sit in front of the television while eating your dinner, checking facebook, writing on your blog, pinning, and texting said boy. And you can even watch another show on your laptop while the one on television is on commercial (if you hadn't saved up enough time to fast forward through them while you were making dinner). You could even pause the show for a second so you can listen to a song clip on iTunes. You could do all your shopping on amazon, check your bank account, check any one of your 4 email accounts, check the Billboard hot 100 (that updates every Wednesday), check on your fantasy team, send a tweet or two, or catch up on the latest news. The options are endless. And this is all during that one tv show that you are watching. Technology brings multi-tasking to a whole new level.

So anyway, like Kip said in Napoleon Dymanite circa 2004(?)---one sec, let me check either wikipedia or imdb for that date.... yep, it was 2004 (ps, did you know that if you type in "napoleon" as a search term in google, "dynamite" is an option before "bonaparte"? Look who's famous now). I'm such a good guesser/rememberer---"I love technology." I do, I really do. But it can also be overwhelming. Would you not agree? I mentioned the bare minimum of situations in this post. I didn't even touch the world of iPads or iPods or YouTube or eBooks and associated eReaders. Didn't even cover lots of stuff. I barely mentioned smartphones, let along the singular iPhone. And I didn't mention most of the perks of having a laptop and laying in bed while enjoying the latest webisode of Very Mary Kate the moment you wake up in the morning. Or the modern ease of making your own movies and producing your own music, and then posting it on any one of the many Web 2.0 sites built for sharing things with the world.

Anywho, happy new year. One of my resolutions is to limit my use of technology. Not limit it too drastically-- I need my laptop and my cellphone and my iPod to survive the day. But maybe I'll go on a facebook fast for like 3 days (then I'll have a million notifications once I finally sign back on!) or I won't watch Netflix Monday through Thursday or something.

Ya'll are probably thinking I'm such a sloth. And sometimes, yes. Like sometimes over Christmas break when your roommates are gone and you have the day off, yes. But I promise that I have 12-hour work days (3 hours of which are on the bus, and I can use technology to keep me company) during which I work very hard, and I am very social when I come home. I go REAL shopping, I go to church, I plan parties, I scrapbook, I work out, I have lots of friends, etc. BUT I do love technology. Probably too much.

Also, if you want to read this as a satire or severe sarcasm, be my guest.

I'm just saying that yours is a sad life indeed when the worst thing that happened to you all day was that your computer died while you were watching a movie on netflix and you had to restart everything and it took a WHOLE 5 MINUTES to reboot because your macbook is 4 years ancient, and it was all because you were too lazy to get out of bed and get your charger when the little "reserve battery now in use" message popped up to give you a 9-minute warning.

And that's another thing. Is it not the WORST THING EVER when the internet is BEING SLOW? And you have to WAIT for a page to load? Or when there's a facebook update and things change, and you have to adjust to a new layout? (speaking of which, how do you all feel about the new timeline thing? I'm skeptical. Is it something I should switch to now because I won't have a choice later, or will I be able to stay old school forever?) Also, google has been doing some weird stuff. I kind of hate the new look that gmail is sporting. And it took forever to adjust to the new google image search thing. It still does weird things when I try to drag and drop images. Not too happy with you, google, not too happy. Also not too happy about the way you stole android technology from Apple OR the way your google+ is trying to kill facebook. Here's a hint: it's never going to work!!!! Facebook is all-powerful and it changed the world!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! (see, I hate google, but I use it at least 80 times a day. And google Chrome is so stinking FAST!)

And raise your hand if you always want to wear a hoodie except they are kind of sloppy and you can't put them on after you have already done your hair or make-up or both because it'll mess everything up, but you can't put it on BEFORE you get ready because then it gets WAY too hot or else the hood gets in the way while you are trying to blow dry your hair upside down.

I have problems.

Whatever. Peace.

Watch This

2012-01-02T09:43:00.001-08:00

And you won't regret it.

verymarykate.com

Snapshots of the last week of 2011

2011-12-31T23:46:00.000-08:00

1. I had dinner with my buddy Cameron. We discussed, in great length, all the things we want to do with our lives. There were just so many great things to do that Cam exclaimed, "It's so awesome I just hate it!" Yes, that is how we should feel about life. Thumbs up.

2. This afternoon I was grumpy. Ya'll know I hate New Years' Eve. All I wanted was to shower and do my fingernails and toenails. ALL I wanted. So I showered and then sat down to pamper. And you know what? I was out of nail polish remover. The worst. So I had to get dressed. And get a little ready. And I went to the store. And bought some nail polish remover. And then came home and polished and glittered until I was happy. The end.

3. The annual Spainhower family Christmas party was last night. I have been informed, don't you worry, that Christmas is over, and that I should call it a "holiday" party, but whatever. The party was as awkward, familiar, and silly as ever, but a lot of people were missing. Which was sad (namely Shawn and Anna, Stephanie, Uncle Kerry, and Andrew and Mallory). But a long-lost uncle showed up. With his new girlfriend (who looked severely young. I asked my aunt how old she was and she said, "um, about 10. hahahaha). And a baby. It took quite some undercover interrogation to discover whether or not the baby, let's call him Eduardo, was long-lost uncle's or not. He isn't. Anyway, little Eduardo liked to run into the center of the gift exchange circle and do little dances. This earned him this comment, from Elise: "Eduardo is my favorite cousin." Elise, apparently, isn't super fond of her other cousins, who have been around for years.

4. My hatred for any type of jelly or jam was renewed on Thursday at lunch. I got a grilled turkey, swiss, and cranberry sandwich at the cafeteria. Little did I know that there was also some sort of orange jelly on the sandwich. I gagged and almost puked. It was nasty. I tried to eat it, I swear. But I couldn't. And I tried to scrape off the jelly. Couldn't do that either.

5. Tuesday evening was spent in a haze of tv shows. That I have sworn never to watch again. Because I get too sucked in. And it doesn't feel healthy. Favorite quote from said tv show: "It's like I'm in a boy band, and I'm the fat one." -brother "It's pronounce Fatone." -sister

6. Whenever I need feminine inspiration I watch Legally Blonde. It happens, oh, maybe twice a year. Today is one of those days. And you know what? I want to go to law school just so I can say, "Am I on glue or did we get into the same law school?" when someone thinks I'm being dumb or ridiculous. I want to be an Elle Woods champion. And I want to wake up to that "Perfect Day" song EVERY morning.

7. I'm sick of 90% of my music. Well, probably more like 99%. My week was spent trying to enjoy what I have. My purchased list has gone cold. There hasn't been anything new and great to download recently. I settled in on The Killers by Wednesday, and semi-enjoyed "Smile Like You Mean It" and "Jenny Was A Friend of Mine" for three days.

8. I came back to Provo from St. George on Tuesday. I had to drive all the way to Fashion Place Mall to drop off my grandma. I got my first glimpse (but did not go inside) of the first H&M in Utah. I still curse at the fact that I haven't been to that store yet. Sheesh. Anyway, Stephanie had to get some make-up at the beautiful semi-new Nordstrom, so I HAD to go inside... in my traveling clothes. With no makeup. And kind of dirty hair. It was an atrocity. That store is very shiny. And full of shiny people in beautiful attire, with pretty hand bags and perfect hair. And then there was Audrey. Ick. Never again.

9. Sunday was Christmas. And it was lovely. Andrew and Mallory were in town and they hung out with us most of the day. I got a straightener and HELLO a sewing machine. And on Monday I sewed an apron. IT SCREAMS AUDREY when you see it. It's blue and white striped seersucker fabric with a big bright yellow pocket. Can you get more Audrey than that? I don't think so. Let me tell you, though, my mother is a miracle. She never uses patterns. Not like aprons are hard to sew anyway, but we just cut out what we wanted and sewed it together, and the apron is adorable.

Happy 2011.

JB and Stevie

2011-12-23T15:22:00.001-08:00

Is it a problem if I think his diamond earrings are kind of hot? It's reminiscent of JT circa 2000. Just saying.

More please.

2011-12-23T13:57:00.000-08:00

I went to the Michael Jackson Immortal World Tour presented by Cirque du Soleil last night. And so begins my detailed exposition.

1. IT WAS WAY TOO LOUD. A lot of the time. Sometimes, though, the too-loudness was enlightening. It really was a different experience listening to Michael at that heightened volume. Let's put it this way: Michael used to record his music, and then everyone would leave the studio because he liked to jam to his demos SO LOUD that no one else could stand the loudness. He liked to feel the room vibrate. So, maybe, last night I got a little taste of what Michael heard, or wanted to hear, when he recorded his songs. And for that, I loved the loudness. I could feel it. And honestly, it sounded a little bit different than I was used to. It's like I could hear different tones and qualities in his voice. It was amazing.

2. There was not nearly enough Michael in the show. Sure, the whole thing was set to his music. And there were moments that were very tribute-esque. And a lot of the choreography (like for Smooth Criminal, Beat It, and Thriller), was exactly how Michael did it. But really, I would have loved a lot more Michael on the screen. A lot more of him. The best parts of the show were the ones where Michael was the most prevalent--- well, that may be a lie. But that's because it was a circus show. The most amazing parts were the ones where the trapeze people did the craziest stunts. But my favorite parts of the show were the ones that were Michael heavy. There was a moment when Speechless turned into Will You Be There, and I didn't know if I could take anymore without throwing up from amazingness. Stephanie screamed involuntarily and her arms flopped around in the air like, I can't take this anymore! It's too much! (In a good way). It all just kept getting better and better, but really, I could have watched a video montage of Michael (like the one at the beginning of the show) and been happy with my $60 ticket. That's how much I enjoyed the Michael in the show. And there should have been more of him.

3. The show started out kind of slow, and honestly, I was a little bit excited for it to be over, so I could drive home and then pretend it was awesome and tell everyone about it (kind of like I'm telling about it now, except there is no pretending going on. I promise). But there was point where I got lost. Totally lost. And unaware of time or anything around me. That's what a good show/movie/whatever is supposed to do. Involve you so much that you are lost. I don't know at what point this happened--- but I do know that when "Gone Too Soon" played and I thought the show was going to end, I felt a distinct sense of loss. I wasn't ready for it to end. Good thing they pulled a Return of the King and had like 4 fake endings, and the show didn't end for a while, because I probably would have lost it if it actually ended then. The show ended on Man in the Mirror, and it's like Michael said in This is It; "you have to be completely nourished by it." And I was. But then it ended and my mom broke the 18th cardinal rule of Audrey. She actually spoke the words, "so what did you think? Did you like it?" MOTHER! YOU HAVE TO LET IT SIMMER! It is impossible for someone to have a developed, reliable opinion on something that they just saw-- when they don't even know what they just saw yet! Here's a hint: NEVER ask me if I liked a movie RIGHT when it ends. I at least need to sit through the credits and gather my wits before I can say anything. And I don't want to hear your opinion either-- it will force me to make a premature decision about whatever it is that I just saw. Sitting in silence is much preferred in this situation, or else conversation about something totally unrelated is acceptable. Luckily, when my mother asked this illegal question, Stephanie forcefully slammed it down--"mother! Audrey doesn't want to talk about it yet! Don't you know her?"

4. But I do have an opinion now. It was fantastic. And I got the chills multiple times. And I didn't want it to end. And it was too loud, and there should have been more Michael. But Earth Song was incredible. Smooth Criminal took my breathe away. Dangerous was mesmerizing. I thought I was going to faint during I'll Be There. During Human Nature there were aerialists with light up suits that changed colors. During Beat It there was a human-sized glittery glove on the stage that came to life and danced. And I am going to make one just like it for Halloween next year. I almost shed a tear during Childhood. I Just Can't Stop Loving You was one of those moments where you wonder how what you are seeing is possible (involving two aerialists that held each other up with one rope 30 feet in the air).

5. Last, they used a lot of the same footage and concepts that are featured on This Is It. Which means that they did a lot of stuff the way it was planned to be done during the actual concert series in 2009. Which means that this was the closest I could ever possibly get to actually attending those shows that never happened. So that was amazing. It was cool to see the whole scenes that were just hinted at in the movie. Incredible.

So I loved it. But I did have this nagging, mournful feeling at the back of my throat for most of the show. I just wish that I could have seen him perform live. I just wish that I could have.

"he just keeps slamming dunks!"

2011-12-20T20:48:00.000-08:00

Please oh please give me children like this kid!!!!

Glambert is the 3 P's

2011-12-20T18:07:00.000-08:00

PURE POP PERFECTION.

I love pop music. This is kind of why. A little techno. A little glam. A little operatic. And a lot of synth. The only thing we're missing is a classic blend of funk and soul.

This song was brought to you by Dr. Luke.... and Glambert, of course.

And check that album artwork. A masterpiece.

And so it goes.

2011-12-18T17:26:00.000-08:00

1. I took a personality test once (okay, I've taken more than one personality test...), and one of the results told me that I, "enjoyed planning things more than actually executing them."

I gasped at the truthfulness of this statement. And at that point (it was probably several years ago), I was very much a planner who never carried out the plans. I thought about things that I could plan. I thought about all the fun things I could do. I made lists... all day.

I still do that. I make lists of things to do-- parties to have-- specific plans for things. Vacations to take, future careers, characteristics of my future husband or children. Things I will do as a mother, things I want to do in my life before I die, stories I want to write, hobbies I want to have, how I will decorate my house, etc.

And I derive so much joy from the plans. From the lists.

So much joy, in fact, that I don't need to see most of the plans come to fruition. It's called imagination, people. And I have it. And it always looks way better in my head than it will in real life. If I never carry out said plans, I will never be disappointed. And I will be protected. And safe. And very, very happy.

2. Do not cover the King of Pop. You will fail.

Very rarely have I heard a good Michael cover. Very rarely. I happen to remember one in history. ever. It was David Cook's "Billie Jean" on American Idol in 2008. And it was only good because it was different enough. And because David Cook has little bit of style. It was a magic moment.

Anyway.

I just got done watching the X Factor tribute to Michael Jackson. All the contestants performed MJ songs, and I think that my opinion of their performances can be best summarized through the faces of Prince, Paris, and Blanket Jackson, who were in attendance of the show.

I particularly appreciate Blanket's reaction. He's like, "what is going ON??"

And he is bored stiff. adorable.

3. I am currently sitting alone in my apartment, fighting the urge to watch tv on netflix; something that I've been doing a little bit too much recently. I'm also fighting the urge to eat everything I can see. I want chocolate, I want candy. And I also want friends. All my roommates are gone for Christmas, which would explain why I am sitting alone on a Sunday evening-- Sunday is usually the busiest, most social day of the week. But Provo has been abandoned. I can see a once chuck-full parking lot looking pretty lonely outside my window. And the sky looks grey, as if it is going to cry because BYU is no longer in session and the clouds can't look down at all the happy, smiling BYU kids. I'm still here, you clouds!!! Smile at me!!! Or better yet, run away and leave the sun to warm Provo up to a good 90 degrees so I can skip work tomorrow and lay out all day. That would be rad. I'm leaving for St.G on Wednesday night. And I am excited... most particularly for Thursday night, which is totes going to be awesome....

4. Because guess what??!?!?!?!?!! I'm going to the Cirque du Soleil MICHAEL JACKSON IMMORTAL WORLD TOUR SHOW!!!! I'm so excited I will probably pee my pants. And then lose my voice from screaming.... before the show even starts.

5. So..... prediction. Matt Carlino is going to be BYU basketball's new "it boy." It'll take a couple of years, but it'll happen. The kid is going to be a big deal.

6. Also, Jimmer scored 21 points in his preseason NBA debut. Just saying.

7. Dearest Timmy Tebow, thank you for playing on my fantasy team this year. And thank for scoring 26 points today. And thank you making religion cool to those outside Mormon world because every guy thinks you are rad and every girl thinks you are hot. Because you are. a babe. Love, Audrey

Hello Tim Tebow. You look like you are having a very nice day.

That is all.

5 years

2011-11-17T18:49:00.000-08:00

5 years ago, today, my big brother came home from his mission. This morning (at like 6:20 am), while on the bus to work, I saw the date on my phone, and texted him right away.

He tried to act surprised that I remembered the date--- and honestly, I doubt that he remembered.

But I counted down the days until November 16, 2006 like a mad woman. I told him, this morning, that this day, 5 years ago, was one of the best days of my life. It really was. I missed by big brother more than I can say. It was one of those painful things that you are obligated to be happy about-- he was doing the right thing, but I just wanted him to come home!

I remember one night while he was one his mission-- about 3 months before he came home-- he called. It was midnight. I answered the phone and FREAKED OUT. He was calling because he had really bad asthma. And he was scared because he couldn't breathe. So he called to talk to my mom. She told him what to do.

I missed my brother so much that night.

And frankly, I missed him a lot all the time. I wrote him more than anyone else did. And that is the truth. Every week. Sometimes twice. Or three times. I just always had so much to say. Unfortunately, (yes, I've already shed tears about this) I used my dixiehigh.org email account to email him so that I could do it at school (during graphics class). And then when I graduated.... my account disappeared. And so did the emails. Oh that just makes me so mad. SO MAD. But I do still have quite a few of them from my hotmail account. I'm just going to paste a small sample below. These emails were a constant confirmation that Andrew was the still crazy, random banana brain that is my brother. But I could see a change for the better, too. You'll see what I mean. :)

May 23, 2005

"im so proud of you for throwin water on innocent bystanders.  i hope you ran away really fast.  did you know my friends and i used to pull up to red lights and throw water balloons in peoples cars?  but that was the apostate andrew.  now i'm saint andrew.  the hurricanes are coming next month. oodillaly how exciting."

And that would be the whole email. The WHOLE thing. But I loved it. It's SO Andrew.

And then,

April 17, 2006

"...thats why knowing of something greater and more constant is so important.  thats why missions are awesome.  i would love to write you a quote about that so you could use it in your graduation speech but it would be too religious and not politically correct.  how are you coming with ideas about that anyway.  im so excited for you.  dont let yourself get nervous.  get up their knowing that you as an individual are so much greater than the situation you are in.  and for the rest of your life you will be able to look back and smile on the memory know matter what is said.  give a speech of hope on a topic that your whole class can relate to.  unity, hope, and memories are the keys.  if you can relay a message that brings a feeling of unity into the gymnasium then youve done an excellent thing.  gotta run"

This is why I love my brother. Anyway, for some reason, I just wanted to share. I try to tell people how great Andrew is, but nobody really gets it, because they are not his sister. Every girl needs a big brother to take care of her, and I'm just so glad that God gave me Andrew. And I'm just so glad, that exactly 5 years ago, he came home to his family, safe and sound, having served the Lord so well.

So I have this roommate

2011-11-14T20:56:00.000-08:00

Her name is Lorina Lee Binning. And she is cool. And she just bought a fantastic camera that I have taken advantage of several times since she spent her savings on it.

A couple of weeks ago we did a photo shoot in Provo Canyon. Lorina already posted her favorites of these on her blog, but these are MY favorites.

I have adorable roommates, you guys. I just love them. But don't worry Rachelle, Lene, Dani, Andrea, Kaitlin, Ashley, Genevieve, Sarie, Ann, and Lynne, I still love you guys too. A lot.

hehe Meghan. We are sharing a funny joke without you.

Halloween is more fun all the time.

2011-11-14T20:43:00.000-08:00

When you are a young adult/college student, Halloween is the best day of the school year (except for maybe reading days and the DAY AFTER finals are over. And except the first day of school. Because I love that day. And probably big athletic events. And other days. But anyway.)

Since I graduated from high school I have had a BLAST at Halloween. Freshman year me, Moe, and Jen made my favorite costumes of all time. We even went trick or treating. That may or may not have been a good idea for 18 year olds. Junior year my roommates and I were Greek goddesses, and is a blast and a half. Last year we threw a bomb party, that I think it might be my favorite party of all time.

AND THEN THIS YEAR. We threw another party. And it rocked. It was even bigger and better than last year (except I think I actually had more fun last year... but whatever).

Instead of posting a million pictures... you should just check out the album on facebook. It's open to the public... because there are so many millions of people in the album that I don't know. I had to make it available for everyone. So anyway... here's the link.

But how about a tasty preview?

Juliet, Gypsy Woman, Sandy, Marilyn

This, again, was one of those parties that stressed me out to the max. I should have started preparing DAYS before I actually did, and I really did kind of have a panic attack the night before. At that point I was ready to get the party all set up and then just come home and go to bed, purposely missing the whole party. Thankfully, I didn't resort to that dramatic refusal of fun. But really. I was anxious about everything. I always am. But then it's always worth it. And so much fun. And really, the only reason everything even worked out was because of the amazing friends that I have. Joey, Meg, Lorina, Edward, Ben, Drake, Mike, Rachel, Sara, Dawna, etc. helped so much. So amazing. I love them. :)

Peace and blessings. Peace and blessings.

A Media Update. Because that's what I'm good for.

2011-11-14T18:13:00.000-08:00

1. I realized, today, that you all are probably just DYING to know what I have to say about "Under the Mistletoe." haha. Well, the diagnosis is good. I think that the album is just perfectly everything that I wanted it to be. It's Bieber at his finest. Some of my favorites are "Only Thing I Ever Get This Christmas" (I'm just going to say that the Bieber is growing up...), "Christmas Eve" (sweet sweet R&B), and "Christmas Love." They are some of the many original songs on the album. The standout cover on the album is "Santa Claus is Coming To Town," and it's stand-out quality is due largely to its reminiscence of the Jackson 5 ("shake it shake it baby...") ALSO, I think that every track EXCEPT ONE says the word, "mistletoe" at least once, which is hot, and frankly, it's what Justin Bieber is all about. My comments on the recent paternity accusations? I'm ignoring the whole thing... until after he takes the test next week. THEN, if he's guilty, there will be some more ignoring. If he's innocent (which I'm betting my copy of "Under the Mistletoe" he is), then I will not shut up about that horrible woman who accused sweet Bieber of such an atrocious thing. And I'll write some nasty letters or something. Or else just tweet a bunch of condolences to JB until I get a retweet. The end.

2. I've been watching The Cosby Show like crazy for about the last two weeks-- since I realized that seasons 1 through 8 are available instantly on Netflix. Holy. That is amazing, right? So in this one episode, Theo goes to the store and picks up a very expensive designer shirt for his upcoming date. Cliff freaks out a little and exclaims, "No 14-year-old boy should have a 95 dollar shirt unless he is on stage with his 4 brothers!" I love that Heathcliff Huxtable.

3. I currently love The Script. They are an Irish band. And they are hot. and did I say Irish? And I melt away into a puddle of nothing every time I hear their current single, aptly named, "Nothing."

4. HOLY CRAP. I'm excited about this movie. And I hesitate posting the trailer here because I'm kind of a weirdy, and this book (and many other books) are such private, emotional, and personal experiences for me that I have a hard time sharing it with the world. Like, I kind of want to see the movie by myself so that whoever I am with can't taint the experience. I think I'll like the movie, though. I have a very poor track record with "books into movies," but this one appears to be everything I hoped it would be. And if not, I'll silently cry myself to sleep and never speak the words "Hunger Games" again in my lifetime. I'll just secretly maintain my devotion to those wonderful books, and write editorials in my head about why it's so good and what it could all mean. I think I should clarify, though, that on Audrey's Scale of Book Loveability, Harry Potter is like 1,000,000 lbs of importance and Hunger Games is like 1,000. They are very uneven--which is why I am even going to attempt seeing this movie (well, and because of this bomb trailer). So... after all the disclaimer and description.... enjoy.

5. I realized today that there is very nearly only one certainty in life. No matter how much EVERYONE hates them, Nickelback WILL ALWAYS manage to have a new song on the radio. Or an old song. Or any song. But you cannot escape them ever. And no matter how much I loathe that man's voice, I still find myself singing along at times (I'm telling you- inescapable), and somehow, it's comforting.

I think that's all.

Oh wait. RIHANNA-- you may have finally fell off the deep of the "too creepy for Audrey" scale with the video for "We Found Love." Buttttttt.......I'm still excited for your new album. Which comes out next week.

Beyonce and Bieber

2011-10-22T00:17:00.000-07:00

My two new favorites:

Pottermore Update

2011-10-22T00:12:00.000-07:00

Uh, it's awesome, and ya'll should be counting down the days until you can join (except that would be really hard, because there isn't a specific date... the beta time was just extended. So. sorry.)

Anyway, I got a wand and everything. It's Unicorn Hair, Rowan wood, 11 inches long. I'm not going to lie-- I was a little sad about the unicorn hair. I mean, who doesn't want a Phoenix feather? I know I did. But then I thought about unicorns, and realized that they are really cool too. And no everyone can have everything that Harry has. Or else then it wouldn't be special. So I'm happy.

The vague "everything" referred to in the latter paragraph includes, most dramatically, the house I was sorted into. If you get on facebook at all, you would have seen that I was placed in the lovely house of Helga Hufflepuff. And I speak honestly when I say "lovely." I truly am proud to be a Hufflepuff. I know that it is generally the house that is cast aside and throw out as boring, lame, stupid, and "the house for all the leftovers" who aren't that smart, brave, or ambitious. BUT, Hufflepuffs are the pure in heart. They are the good ones. The ones that are kind and helpful to everyone (ex. Cedric Diggory). And as Cedric points out in the Very Potter Musical on YouTube (which is hardly canon, might I add), "Hufflepuffs are good finders!" So I'm proud to be a good one. And Hufflepuff colors are yellow and black. And yellow is my favorite, duh. PLUS, I know where the Hufflepuff Common Room is (exactly!), and YOU DON'T!

That is all.

Post #264

2011-10-22T00:05:00.000-07:00

1. What twitter is good for: Lord_Voldemort7 and Justin Bieber tweets. Why? Who doesn't want endless comparisons between Harry Potter, Mean Girls, and the actual world like they are the same thing? Sporadic comments about "Sparkly Cedric" are also appreciated. And JB? One heart. It's all about the retweets from adoring, obsessive fans who express their undying love daily. And the constant updates on JB's news, and, oh, he doesn't forget to thank his fans and tell them he loves them at least 8 times a day.

2. I think Justin Timberlake is trying to EGOT. He has like 4 Emmys and 6 Grammys. And now he's working on an Oscar (I would conjecture). As much I as I WOULD LOVE to buy another album with his name on it, I want my boy JT to have a shiny silver EGOT necklace just like Tracy Jordan's.

3. If there is one thing I miss about the years 2006-2010 (besides my byu career), it's Hannah Montana. No longer are there new catchy musical messages to teach girls confidence, hard work, sticktoitiveness, and self-appreciation. If I ever get mad at Moriah for something, she responds, "Nobody's perfect, you live and you learn it." I miss Hannah, and I miss the old Miley.

4. Joe Jonas creeps me out these days. If you haven't seen the "Just In Love" video, don't watch it. I hate it. The Jonas Brothers were partially so great because they wore chastity rings. They would talk about their promise to be chaste and to wait until marriage. Joe, I think, breaks promises. It's disgusting.

5. Brandon Flowers. I am not a professed Killers fan, but I do love Mr. Brightside (it made the list of top 100 songs of the 2000's!), When You Were Young, Human, and Spaceman. I have followed the band throughout the years. And, well, this video is just cool.

6. Oh football season, please never end.

7. Moriah is a tennis star. For real, though. She should win all sorts of awards for looking adorable in a tennis skirt.

8. I went to St. George a couple weeks ago and it was heavenly. So heavenly.

9. Jimmer's Allstar game. I have to admit; I was overly excited to go see Jimmer, I was almost equally excited to see Kemba Walker. I don't know why, but I just think that he is cool. And for real, he had swagger. He was a crowd pleaser. You could see the charisma dripping off of him. Anyway. I went to the game with my favorite Mike Poulson. The boy loves Jimmer more than anyone I know, and is hilarious.

9. Um, Cornbellys? Why have I never been to this place before this year? You GUYS!! It is a blast. It's like beautiful fall and festival fun and cute boys and scary things all wrapped into one. And I think that hay rides are unreasonably fun.

Who is that creeper in the back? Oh wait. We know him.

creepin in the corn.

this is my scared face... yeah. fail.

Photo-ops are in my top 10 favorite things.

Soooooooooooooo. that's a catch up.

And next week is halloween. Which means that I'm having a party. GET READY TO RUMBLE!!!!

Old Maid's Day

2011-10-21T23:34:00.000-07:00

(I recently realized that I have a bunch of unfinished drafts of blog posts... so I'm going to publish some of them. This was written in June of this year.)

So I like to throw parties. In a series of fortunate events I learned that June 4 is Old Maid's Day. I decided that there was only one way to celebrate such a great holiday that commemorates so many of my favorite people. Because, you know, if more people celebrated Old Maid's Day maybe it would be more worth it to be an Old Maid. (ps, I don't actually think I am an old maid. But I love in Provo for crying out loud).

Anyway. That one way to celebrate was a monster girl party. The exclusive facebook invite looked a thing or two like this:

So guess what.

June 4th is officially Old Maid's Day (according to some random website I found like 2 months ago).

In Provo world, many of us are old maids. Or even if we are not old maids, we like to have girl parties.

So. Come for girl foods (aka chocolate, ice cream, buttery buttery popcorn, cutie cupcakes, and a veggie tray to make us feel less guilty), girl movies (aka She's the Man, Mean Girls, and/or How to Lose a Guy in 10 days), and lots of gossiping. Come with all your juice (preferably about cute boys).

And the most important part: this party is. a. secret.

It's an exclusive bash. "It's just for a couple of cool people and you better be one of them bio***." (guess)

Bring your pajamas, blankets for comfort and sleeping, possibly your mattress, food, and other necessaries.

LAST THING: BRING YOUR FAT PANTS LADIES!

I'm so funny.

So we had lotsa food (including chocolate chip cookie covered oreos. yep that's right) and lotsa Mean Girls and then lotsa gossip, which included a spectacular game of "truth or truth." Some of the best "truth" questions included, "who is your most embarrassing ward crush ever?" and "if you had to marry someone in the ward RIGHT NOW who would it be?"

It was a blast, and after only 4 hours of sleep, all of us showed up at church all hyped up and ready to go.

Man. I love being single.

Quoted from my mother: "He's kind of beautiful."

2011-10-02T12:30:00.001-07:00

holy.

2011-09-23T22:59:00.001-07:00

I just got the welcome email from Pottermore. You guys. It's just as good and as cool and we thought it would be. I've just barely cracked the surface, and I'm trying to figure it out. But it's awesome. I cannot even handle it. And once I get my wand and get sorted, I'll be sure to tell ya'll about it.

yes.

Yeah, I don't know how either.

2011-09-19T18:04:00.000-07:00

Usher. I usually don't like him that much. Except that I think he's just really cool. Like really cool.

Okay. So here's the kick. The reason why I love this song.

It reminds me of Michael.

Not the music. The voice. It's like Usher has been listening to Michael for the past year and been focused solely on trying to imitate Michael's vocal stylings. He has taken on some of the artistry that until today, I thought belonged only to Michael.

Respect, Usher. Respect.

That is all.

So I was at the gym the other day...

2011-09-18T14:42:00.000-07:00

... And while on the elliptical, I almost peed my pants while watching Ellen. You guys, it's hilarious.

I was laughing my head off and all the people around were looking at me funny. But I didn't care, because it's just that hilarious.

Wow it's been a long time

2011-09-15T22:55:00.000-07:00

I think about blogging all the time. Really, I do. I walk around at work or at home or I'm on the bus and I think about what I want t blog about.... but for some reason, in the last month, the fingers to keyboard part has not happened. And it's like the longer I wait the more I have to say, and the more overwhelming it gets. So I'm going to do a sum-up of the last month or whatever, and then we're just going to move forward.

1. I moved out of my lovely home in Banbridge Square. It was more heartbreaking than expected. I really thought of that place as home. But now I live in Victoria Place II-- about a half a block away from BB. And I really do like the apartment. And I love my roommates (Meg, Lorina, and Rachel). But I sincerely miss Lene, Sarie, and Andrea. And I miss my Fivers. My ward. Anyway. Goodbye forever Banbridge. It was a great place to live--- my favorite as BYU by far. Two best best summers took place while living in Banbridge. And the other best summer (in DC), took place right before living in Banbridge. I've had a good couple of years, I think (minus student teaching, of course. But even that has it's merit. I like to think I'm a better person for having done it).

Lene's going away party.

2. Lene left forever. Well, I'll see her again. I have to. But she's student teaching in DC and a little part of me left with her. I tried to convince her to say, citing all of my reasons for hating student teaching, but she didn't listen to me. She's going to learn on her own that it is awful. haha.

3. My Fivers won the stake kickball tournament. We won it last year too. We are so stinking cool I can't even stand it.

Kickball champions. We're holding up fives because we're the fivers. We rock.

4. We kind of hiked Mt. Timp. When I say kind of I mean that we didn't actually get to the top this year. Well, most of the group did. There were 19 of us, and the wise and happy 6 stayed behind in the meadow and then headed down early to go to the pool. It was lovely. I have to admit that I was exhausted and a little bit miserable and didn't want to take another step, but I could have (which is evidenced by last year's hike of Mt. Timp that I lovingly compared to climbing Mt. Doom into Mordor. See THIS post). And really, without finishing the whole thing, the hike didn't knock me out for the next three days like it did last year. I actually came home, went to the pool, took a nap, and was good to go. And I still completed like a 14 mile hike! That's already an accomplishment. And it was very beautiful.

the losers who came down early.

me and my pal Sara. We're excited. Meghan gave me that cute flower.

hikers.

5. I still love my job. But I love it a lot more when I get lots of good sleep. I have a hard time going to bed on time. big surprise. At first I just loved going to bed because I was so excited about the next day of work (plus, nothing too exciting was going on anyway). But the month of August was particularly hard. I didn't get to bed until after midnight a lot of the month (which is very, very bad when you have to get up between 5:30 and 5:50). I barely survived on 5 hours of sleep a night, but slept on the bus there and back. Let me tell you a bad story: sleeping on the bus is one of the more miserable things in life. Here is a simple equation to summarize the wretchedness: tiredness so complete that keeping your eyes open is self-imposed torture and you want to cry+no place to rest your head except the window, which is greasy from the head of the last person who tried to sleep there in addition to being made of hard glass, and somehow exceptionally sensitive to the jolts and bumps of the bus that is moving at (hopefully) 65 mph in the carpool lane+excessive stopping and starting due to rush hour traffic+the large stinky man sitting next to you+the bags, jacket, lunch, etc., that you are trying to balance on your lap. It's not a good experience. SO. The conclusion that rational thought leads us to: SLEEP BETTER AT NIGHT SO YOU CAN STAY AWAKE ON THE BUS AND DO PRODUCTIVE THINGS LIKE READ YOUR SCRIPTURES OR CONFERENCE TALKS OR ANY ONE OF THE 4 NOVELS THAT YOU HAVE BEEN TRYING TO FINISH FOR LIKE 4 MONTHS. Yeah, I'm working on that. So anyway, I love my job. I've really been thinking about hurrying up and getting my masters so I can move up in the library-- work in collection development or something and do real archive work. I miss processing. I miss doing the research and the writing. And holy heck, I miss school (see below).

5. Even though I still live in Provo and am desperately clinging to any semblance of my old BYU life as a student, I am left out of BYU world (for good reason), and that makes me very sad and very nostalgic. Sometimes I drive around Provo and just look at all the buildings-- virtually everything withing a 2 mile radius of BYU is labeled "cougar" or "byu" something or other, or else students live there-- and I remember what it was like when I was new to this world. I was still a very excellent student who did all her homework with great care and precision, who went to bed at like 10 and didn't do things with friends on week nights, and spent weekends doing homework. I was stressed, but I loved it. And do you know what I loved the most? The thing that I noticed the very most about this new world that I was immediately sucked into? That everyone was kind of like me. Everyone cared about school and grades, at least to some extent. It was such a drastic change from Dixie that I was in awe of these hordes of students who all went to class and who all did their homework with the same vim and vigor that I did. The library was FULL of students studying and reading and writing papers and I was amazed. I was so happy to be part of a world where I felt I belonged. And do you know what they did to this girl who loved BYU so much? They kicked her out. They made her graduate and supposedly move on to bigger and better things. I'm supposed to "go forth and serve" And I think I have. And I will. I'm loving life now-- working at the church-- but I still miss school. I miss it a lot. I want to get food in the Cougareat and then eat it in the terrace while watching CNN and doing the sudoku from the Daily Universe that day. I want to read the police beat and run into random people on campus that I kind of know but kind of don't. I want to walk by all those annoying dancer people in the wilk and then go to the bookstore and look through the journals (for the 4th time in a week) and the YA books (which I always knew more about than the girls that worked there), and then buy one of the delicious cookies from the candy counter that were only 33 cents and if you bought 10 then you got one for free. I want to take fliers from the hot rugby boys and then go to their games. I want to go to class and take lots of notes and use highlighters and post-it notes. And I want to spend reading days and finals weeks at the library for hours and hours and take breaks only for meals, three times a day. I want to make my own schedule all day every day and have group meetings and big projects and horribly annoying but kind of awesome papers to write. I want to do my reading and take breaks in the sampler room of the library to either take a nap or read my favorite parts of a Tennis Shoes Adventure Series book. I want to laugh at the annoying couples in the library, and I want to whiz right past all the people in line for computers and use the secret computers and printers that only the experiences BYUers know about. I want a hot bread and honey butter from the sugar and spice, and I want to walk to devotional, and I want to eat lunch on the grass and observe the quill and the sword club. I want to walk up to campus in the terrifying but magical snow. There is hardly anything more peaceful than an early morning walk to campus on untouched snow with light flurries still falling around you. Heck I loved being a student at byu.

6. We went to Rachel's fairy tale cabin for a night. With probably too many people. But there was lots of flirting and eating of delicious food. And it was fun.

I can't see this picture without cracking up. Why are we all hiding behind Meg? And Seth and Drake-- what are you even doing back there?

7. Paul FINALLY took me sailing. It was magical. There should be another word that means the same thing as magical but better to describe sailing. I knew I would love sailing. I already knew that I love boats and water and sun and everything happy, and sailing could just easily be added to the list. Thanks for taking me Paul!! You're the best.

heaven.

whoa excited.

8. Last Monday was Labor Day and me and Meg had a very full day. The Schedule included: hike to Stuart Falls, 7Peaks for the last time this calendar year, Volleyball, Sailing, and then the NFL fantasy draft party. Yes, I have a fantasy team this year. I've been wanting to do it for years, and this year when I was invited into a league with all sorts of cute boys, I finally committed to doing it. And let me tell you what, that draft was one of the more stressful things I've experienced since student teaching. We just took turns picking players, but it moved so fast, and I had to reevaluate my picks all the time, and I wasn't really sure what was going on anyway, that it turned out to be very... exhausting. But I'm excited. I got me some great runningbacks, a fabulous tight end, and very strategic receivers, qbs, and team defense. It's gonna be awesome.

stuart falls.

9. My friend Christopher took me to a concert. But not just any concert. A Parachute-Michelle Branch-GOO GOO DOLLS concert. So he mostly went to see Parachute. One of his buddies from home is their roadie. But holy heck, I went for the Goos. I don't know if you remember, but I love them. Mostly I love "Iris." When they played that song I practically had a spiritual experience. It is one of the best songs of our generation, and I will stand by that statement until the day I die.

the goo goo dolls man. who has the voice of an angel.

10. Also, I just realized I am so dumb. I have not even blogged about the 4th of July, or anything that happened in July for that matter. Maybe I'll just post some pictures, and you'll have to take my word for it that July was amazing, as per usual.

we sat outside during the stadium of fire to watch david archuleta. It was awesome.

11. I loved this summer. I am still so happy to be back in Provo, and so happy to never have to student teach again. I talked to Lene for like an hour today and she had very similar complaints about student teaching that I did. This just reaffirms my suspicion that student teaching is awful all the time. HATE.

12. You guys. The Church Office Building cafeteria is Disneyland for adults. I went there for the first time last week. And now I want to go there everyday. Luckily I have a little bit of discipline and still bring my lunch... sometimes. But seriously. This place has everything you could want or imagine and it is SO CHEAP. And by cheap I mean inexpensive but delicious. Some other great things about the cafeteria: 1) you can get there by going through the tunnels under temple square. I do it everyday. 2) An old guy plays the piano for all to hear while they enjoy their yummy food. 3) yummy food includes cookies and frozen yogurt. 4) there is a bar against the wall in the dining area, and there are newspapers hanging on the wall. People who sit in their desks all day stand at the bar and catch up on the national news. You can't get more productive than that. Man I love the Church. Plus all the people are just so jolly all the time.

I don't remember what else I was going to write about, so I guess that's all!!!!!!!!!!!

Pottermore

2011-08-04T08:34:00.000-07:00

I'm finally registered.

It took a couple of days, a lot of research on Mugglenet and Hypable.com (a new fansite for HP and other fandoms made by my friends at Mugglenet), a 3AM wake up call, a dash out of the center vault on the first floor following an informative tweet (I took my break early), a quiz question (that was easy), a changed URL, a Magical Quill, and finally, a confirmation email.

It was a process.

But I got in.

Now I just have to wait for the welcome email, which will come in the next couple of weeks, and will FINALLY allow me to view the site. I guess they did the welcome email thing to that everyone wouldn't try to log in at the same time and crash the site.

But can you tell? I'm excited. I want to read that bonus material!!!!!

My new job.

2011-07-18T20:11:00.000-07:00

I love it. In fact, I love it so much that I kind of forgot that I have a blog. I am suddenly soooo busy. But good busy. Really good busy.

And now, I have something to say that is going to BLOW YOUR MIND.

I get up at 5:30AM, AND IT DOESN'T EVEN BOTHER ME!

I go to bed at 10:30pm, and I LIKE IT!

I am at work or on a bus for 12 hours of my day, and I find so much fulfillment out of it, that I don't care. I come home and am literally awake for 4 hours before bed. But I feel healthy and good.

And that is my life.

And it's so great.

Reasons why I love my job:

1. It doesn't involve students or teaching.
2. I get to hang out with senior and service missionaries all day. One of the young man service missionaries plays Lord of the Rings from his computer in the morning. It is my heaven.
3. There is a senior sister with fiery red hair that actually sticks out like flames. She never stops talking, and it wastes half my lunch time, but I love her.
4. I sit at my desk/cubicle for probably an average of 45 minutes per day. The rest of the time I am chilling (literally. at 55 degrees fahrenheit) in the vaults. There are 12 of them in the library. And it rocks.
5. I have amazing co-workers.
6. I have a name tag.
7. I get to say that I "work for the church."
8. I hang out on temple square before, during, and after work.
9. There are sometimes cute boys on the bus.
10. I love to organize things-- you know, put them in alphabetical or numerical order. I like to count things. I like to keep things straight and perfect. And that's what I do all day. Plus, they put me in charge of inventory of all archival supplies.
11. There are opportunities for growth. I can certify in certain areas and build my resume.

And the number 1 reason:
12. THEY PAY ME.

I am so sick of working for free its insane (internships and student teaching). And the best part about that is that I DON'T HAVE TO ANYMORE. Life is good.

So last weekend I got my first pay check.

First stop: TARGET.

I spent $100 on cosmetics, accessories, and dress pants in literally 30 minutes. It was the happiest 30 minutes of.... I don't know. the month.

Second stop: I paid back all the people I borrowed money from (aka my family members. Thank you btw) to survive the last month or so.

Third stop: PASS OF ALL PASSES!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Yes, you read that right. I am the proud owner of a pass of all passes to 7 peaks, Trafalga, and Orem Owlz and Utah Flash games.

I can hear the fun train coming around the bend.

(yeah, so last Saturday, I went to the Mt. Timp Temple, 7 Peaks, Pizza Pie Cafe, and "Thor" at the dollar theater. It was a good day)

Chris Brown

2011-07-02T14:08:00.001-07:00

I feel like he's back to stay.

exhibit A: Justin Bieber collaboration.
exhibit B: the Joe Jonas song.
exhibit C: Michael Tribute. That rocks.

The backtrack, PS, is from 1983's "Human Nature." And part of the melody is even the same.

Michael Jackson

2011-06-25T15:22:00.001-07:00

It's been two years. today.

Excited for real now.

2011-06-24T12:20:00.000-07:00

So... about a week ago I got a new job. A dream job. The exact job that I wanted, actually.

Drumroll please.

Starting on Monday, I will be working at the Church History Library in Salt Lake City.

notice: this building is kitty-corner from temple square and directly across the street from the Conference Center. Excellent location.

I COULD NOT BE MORE EXCITED.

I first saw the posting for this job in March, late one Saturday night (when I say late, I mean like 1am), and I knew instantly: this is my job. MY JOB.

So I applied, and within a week I had a phone interview. The interview went okay... but there were some timing problems. They needed me to start before graduation, and I wasn't even going to be back in Utah by then.

I was actually a little bit relieved because I hadn't wanted to start working full-time immediately after student teaching. I needed a significant break. And a significant break I have had (try 2.5 months), during which I had great anxiety about getting a job and supporting myself. It's hard to carry out your big plans when you have no money. Seriously.

So I tried to get other jobs. Any job really....But one of the jobs I finally did get was at the church Vault in Little Cottonwood Canyon. I was really excited about that one. BUT. The guy at the library called me last week (before I was supposed to start at the vault) and said he had another spot open up that we wanted me to interview for. So I did. And I got the job.

Dreams come true.

This is my testimony. Things will always work out. They can be stressful and confusing and give you great anxiety, but the Lord always provides a way. I'm just so grateful that everything has worked out this way. I have loved my time off, but I'm excited to get back to a schedule and start working. And you know what? I think I'm going to love this job.

So. Recap of an awesome yesterday.

2011-06-24T11:25:00.000-07:00

1. Jimmer went to the Kings. As quoted by Andrew, "The sky just fell...looks like I'm now a Kings fan."
I for one, am please that he went to the Kings. I mean, I could have imagined a better possibility, but hey, what's wrong with the Kings? Andrew said they were one of the coolest teams ever, and that he was a fan when the Jazz were crappy post Stockton and Malone. So I'm a happy camper. I had a little convo with Andrew via text message yesterday:
Audrey: how are you feeling about Jimmer and the Kings?
Andrew: Terrible.
Audrey: Why?
Andrew: Jazz silly girl.
Audrey: No. We didn't want him at the Jazz. I didn't anyway. But do you have anything against the Kings?
Andrew: How could u possibly speak such a terrible treason?
Audrey: (thinking: woah. are we a wee bit dramatic, brother?) I wanted him to get outside of Utah a little bit. Plus I wanted a new nba team to like. But I don't know if I can like the Kings...
Andrew: He is from New York duppy lions! And one favorite nba team is plenty for a casual fan such as yourself! But the kings are one of the coolest teams in the nba.
Audrey: If the Kings are so cool, then what's the problem?
Audrey: Duppy lions?

end of conversation. 2 things: 1) where did duppy lions come from? and 2) does anyone else feel like this conversation was a little bit circular? Andrew. Why are you so mad about the Kings if they are such a cool team? You make no sense.

2. Pottermore. Yeah, so I set my alarm for 6:55am so I could get up and hear the announcement about Pottermore. And guess what it is? A new interactive Harry Potter website written by JK Rowling. It's going to include all the information that a published encyclopedia would have. I'm still holding out hope for an actual hard copy encyclopedia (dang it, I want one of those). And here's the kicker: the thing that makes me the most excited about it: that JK Rowling is actually going to devise the system that the sorting hat on the website will use to sort people into houses. Do you realize what this means? Everyone actually gets to be sorted FOR REAL. I'm so nervous. What if I get placed in the wrong house? What if I don't get placed in the house that I have been dreaming of since 2001? Again, I refer you to a texting conversation that took place yesterday, this time between my cousin Shawn and I. He is listed in my phone as "Slytherin Sirius."

Audrey: ...but I'm excited! Shawny, this means we get to be sorted for real!
Slytherin Sirius: have fun in Ravenclaw Pot-Pot. (he calls me Potter or Potty or Pot, or Pothead, or I guess, now, pot-pot)
Audrey: NOOOOOOOO!!!!!
Slytherin Sirius: haha. If you're not, the whole sorting can't be trusted.

Note to Slytherin Sirius: you will eat your words when JK Rowling herself puts me in Gryffindor.

check it out. pottermore.com

3. Lene's birthday: First thing in the morning: we started watching Armageddon, Lene's favorite movie. I had never seen it before, so it was a treat. Then Lene went to lunch at Communal by herself yesterday. I would have gone... but I have no money. But guess who she ran into at the restaurant? A certain Bachelorette jerk head from Utah and his little daughter. Yes. You guessed it. She saw him in person, and I could not be more jealous. I like want to go hang out in front of Communal just in case he comes back. That would rock.

Second, we went shopping and then to the Jimmer draft party with our ward... and then to dinner at Pizzeria 712 in Orem. Yummy margarita pizza please. I could eat one of those everyday. And Lene looked beautiful in her new birthday outfit! We went to Spark for drinks and dessert afterward and lounged on those sweet benches looking cool and gossiping. High class, right? It was a ton of fun (but did anyone else notice that there was no music playing in Spark? It was weird.)

Lene, you rock my world, and I am so glad we are roommates! I don't think I can survive without you in the fall. Who will I play truth or truth with (for hours on end)? Who will I count on to do sign language to the people in the other cars? Who will I turn to when I can't decide which of all the boys in the ward I would kiss (haha)? Let's face it, my life is going to be a lot less fun when you are gone.

So anyway, Happy Birthday.

4. We forgot to pay our gas bill. oops.

The NBA Draft is on Thursday

2011-06-20T10:25:00.000-07:00

Why do I care? Jimmer.

What else is on Thursday?
Well, I think our gas bill is due.
And. It's Lene's 25th birthday. The party begins at midnight.

Last: Um. HI. JK Rowling is making an announcement on Thursday. The YouTube countdown just informed me that the announcement is 2 days 17 hours 33 minutes and 5 seconds away. For more information see: www.pottermore.com

I like Thursday.

My life is so much fun.

2011-06-19T23:01:00.000-07:00

These days, I can't stop having fun. And it's pretty great too, because I have zero money to spend, but somehow I still get to do all the awesome things I want!

This week included the following:
1. An overnight trip to Grandma Colleen's house in Ogden. It was her birthday. She made me go to her ceramics class with her. For 4 hours. And we had repeated lunches with old people. Who are very sweet... but eat very slowly. I couldn't handle it. Grandma couldn't either.
2. last minute trip to Salt Lake for a job interview. Score.
3. A visit with my parents-- they came up for the weekend, but I only got to see them for like an hour on Friday. We ate at the Santa Queen diner in Santaquin.
4. Lots and lots of laying out by the pool. Like, 4 days this week. I can't get enough.
5. Ward softball. I'm finally starting to stop making a fool of myself every week. Slowly but surely.
6. Sleeping in to about 10:30am every day (except when I was in Ogden. Grandma is a slave driver.)
7. The wedding reception of the one and only Jake Basilius. He was a good friend in my Liberty Square ward. And it was just precious to see him married off to a lovely girl (who is my friend Kate's cousin, btw. which is cool. Kate: I vouch for Jake. He's a good guy). AND, I can't believe that I've known Jake for almost 4 years. Time flies when you're having a blast. For real, though.
8. Strawberry Days Rodeo on Friday. I haven't been to a rodeo since probably age 7. And for good reason. Rodeos are terrifying. Meghan thought I was crazy for being scared of the rodeo and Lene just kept saying, "I LOVE AMERICA!", but when I told my brother about the rodeo the next day he was like, "oh yeah, I hate rodeos. I went to one last year and the kids ride on sheep! It's awful!" And I was like, "I know! This is real modern-day gladiator stuff right here!" I think we were raised by the same parents.
9. I went to the gym 5 days last week. I rock. Next week it'll be six.
10. Lorina Lee's surprise birthday party. Meghan did a spectacular job with the preparations. She made these adorable lantern things out of mason jars (which broke because boys are children), a delicious cake, and a lovely table setting, and instructed me to make a giant polaroid frame that we could pose in for pictures. Photos to come. It was adorable. Double props. And bonus points.
11. Oh, and last Sunday was Picnic Awesome.Which was awesome.
12. On Wednesday we had ward ice blocking. I haven't been ice blocking since probably age 9. It's a lot more fun when you are 9. Me and Lene tried to do cool tricks on the ice blocks, none of which actually worked. The most hilarious was when we went (kind of) down the hill back to back.
13. After ice blocking we organized a game of fugitive. We played from 7 peaks to Banbridge. This led to lots of cutting through blocks, hiding behind trees, and collapsing to the ground when a car was coming. My favorite was when we ran through the Colony and everyone was out on their porches-- laughing and pointing at us. Yeah, we're cool. But we didn't get caught, so you do what you gotta do, right?
14. Movie Monday at the dollar theater. My girls and I went to see "Prom." yeah. It's a lot dumber than the trailer makes it look. This Monday we're going for "Water for Elephants."

Remember 2 months ago when I was crying about my life in Washington? I am such a whiner. Things are so much better now. I'm the happiest camper there ever was.

Speaking of camping. I need to plan a trip. Probably when I have money.

J Jonas

2011-06-18T09:36:00.001-07:00

think about it. Who does it sound like this song was written by?

Chris Brown.

All the way.

Anyway. I love me some Jonas.

Bieber.

2011-06-17T11:10:00.001-07:00

He's suddenly such a little man. That kiss at the end: me and Lene both screamed. Bieber!!!!!! You're still a little baby!!!! STOP!!!

But I love the song. And thank you Chris Brown.

Lemon/Lime Picnic AWESOME

2011-06-13T10:31:00.000-07:00

Why do I always get to stressed out before events that I plan? I always get all freaky and worry that things are going to go wrong-- that no one will show up (or that the few who do show up will think the party is lame), that I won't have everything ready in time, that the party is boring, or whatever.

But everything always works out. Eventually. And somehow I always have so much fun that I'm dying to plan something else. The stress is always worth it. (timeout: I get stressed when I'm throwing a little picnic because I worry about all the people and all the details. Now imagine what I will be like when I throw my own wedding. I'm going to be a basketcase. A monster bridezilla. And I'll feel so bad!!!)

Anyway, last year we had the first "Picnic AWESOME." You guessed it, it was awesome. Lene and Amy threw it. This year, we decided to reprise the awesome. But this time, we added a theme: lemon and lime. We made all our invitations, and they all looked different. The invitation went a little something like this:

when: Sunday June 12, 2011 @2 pm

where: Carterville Park, Orem (the same as last year)

why: because.

Theme: LEMON/LIME

Please Wear: green and/or yellow ONLY.

Please bring: green and/or yellow food ONLY.

Those who fail to abide by the rules will be forced to wear a green sign around the neck that reads: "No longer awesome."

Anywho. Lene, Andrea, and I hand delivered all the invites to make sure that everyone understood all the rules. And do you know what's amazing? Almost everyone followed them. There were a few deliquents who had to wear signs. Look for their pictures below.

Anyway. The Picnic was yesterday... and it came together quite nicely after I worried for a couple of hours.

the table setting: compliments of Lene Kristine Botolfsen. The cool one.

Extras. no longer awesome. These two were such good sports. Except not. haha.

deliberately rude. they wore the wrong colors on purpose because they thought the signs were a more awesome option.

pretties.

uglies. jk.

cute boys.

dani is holding a tupperware of the most delicious cookies in the world.

the birthday girl.

Rachelle: effortlessly beautiful, even when her tongue is sticking out.

specials. rachelle and brad assumed correctly that they could get away with not following the dress code. grrr.

giant game of catchphrase. my favorite. (hint: you make this on the beach...SANDCASTLES!).

requirement: 4 people per snuggie. DANI. get your elbows outta there.

more cute boys. Get a load of the one in the back. we don't know him.

Favorite things about the picnic that I just can't get over:

1. ALL THE MATCHING CLOTHES. You all know that I love it to death when people match. I just got so excited when more and more people arrived wearing green and yellow (okay, mostly green).
2. I just love that when I help plan something, I get to invite a lot of my favorite people. I can assemble the group. In this case it was mostly ward people and old ward people (except the ones who couldn't come). And how awesome is that?
3. The girls did an excellent job bringing delicious yellow and green food. The boys, however, did not shine so well. Some examples: purple peeps (compliments of the 4 cute boys featured above. yes. left over from Easter), tortillas (what were we supposed to do with them?) and PINK watermelon (which was delicious, but really Joe? Against the code.)

So anyway. Picnic AWESOME was awesome.

You guys.

2011-06-13T09:42:00.000-07:00

New favorite thing of my life.

Kathy Beth Terry.

Quoted: "Sascha Fierce is to Beyonce as Kathy Beth Terry is to me." -Katy Perry.

Katy Perry has created a 1990s 13-year-old alter ego to promote her new single, "Last Friday Night." And it is HILARIOUS. She even used whatsherface Rebecca Black in the promo.

Kathy Beth Terry's favorite things include beanie babies, Anne Frank stickers, JTT, Jared Leto, Will Smith, Devon Sawa, and Leo.

I remember those days.

Check out her twitter and facebook page. hilar.

That's all.

Summer is a party

2011-06-12T16:10:00.000-07:00

Andrea: my superstar roommate

On Friday I wanted to have a bonfire. So we had one.

My favorite part is that I got to wear my windbreaker.

I think I actually had a tear.

2011-06-08T11:25:00.001-07:00

Valentines Day 2012.

New respect for Adam Levine

2011-06-08T11:09:00.000-07:00

<br><br><br><br>Lost

Lost respect for Christina. And really? Stop singing "We Are the Champions." It's too cheesy unless sung by Queen in its proper context.

Charming.

2011-06-01T23:34:00.000-07:00

1. Can I please be a member of the Huxtable family? I am in love with Heathcliff Huxtable. I want to marry someone just like him, and then become a Claire Huxtable. I'll be a lawyer while he is a doctor, and we'll have kids who get crazy ideas and ask for money all the time. But we'll put them in their place-- teach them life lessons without the "Full-House" style sappy part at the end (it is for this reason that The Cosby Show is leagues better than its many genre equivalents).

2. I finished "The Book Thief" today, about 7 months in the making. I don't know why I never got into this book. I started in like October and just read it at the gym, then brought it to DC with me, and didn't touch it the whole 4 months I was there. But now I'm done. I finished the last 100 pages today, and you know what? I really liked it. It's a beautiful story about what is important in life-- it's a story of abandonment and guilt, courage and love--- and it's a story about the power of words. I would actually recommend it to anyone. Markus Zusak is somehow able to create small moments that are breathtaking and powerful and stabbing. And meaningful. I'll be thinking about it for a while.

That's all.

Oh wait, we had a party. For Memorial Day. It was crowded. The floor was shaking and I thought it was going to break. We got a lot of highlighter on the carpet (dang it). And there was a girl there (who no one knew) who kept trying to change the music, and I was super moody about it. But there were boys and writing on walls is fun. And as per the Facebook instructions, almost everybody actually showed up wearing white. Yay white-out for Memorial Day and black lights.

See pics below.

isn't this bomb?

Lene is so cool.

some of the early party people.

That's really all.

To make a living

2011-05-23T15:16:00.000-07:00

I remember seeing a lady on Oprah when I was like 10 who made her living by entering sweepstakes and contests full time.

I've decided it's a great idea. Really.

So I've begun my career as a professional sweepstakes participant on the 97.1 ZHT website. I've entered the contest for a free PASS OF ALL PASSES 11 times. And I entered to win tickets to the American Idol tour. Think of how much money I could save if all of my social spending was eliminated because I won so many prizes??

My college degree is already paying off.

Ah, Provo.

2011-05-22T11:00:00.000-07:00

1. I went to the Justin Bieber movie for the third time. I still love it.
2. I never thought I'd say this, but I really love the brand new Lady Gaga song, "The Edge of Glory." That woman(?) usually totally creeps me out, but this song totally has an 80's rocker/techno vibe, which I love. So it's an exception.
3. I'm also in love with the new Glee cover of Adele's "Rolling in the Deep." Take it away Jesse St. James. And then give your voice to the man I marry.
4. There are four words that have been on repeat in my head (and on my lips) since I arrived in Provo, and they are giving me anxiety: "I need a job." It's hard to enjoy NOT having a job when you need one so bad. You'd think I have all the time in the world to do whatever I want. But really, my time is just consumed by worry, stress, and job applications. HATE.
5. Seeing old friends is a BLAST. Calista, Liz, Taryn, and Paul: you're next. Individually of course.

My big brother graduated.

2011-05-06T23:38:00.000-07:00

My big brother graduated from Dixie State today. This means that after this summer, he and his lovely little wife are going to move away from St. George. I'm going to miss those two. I love them so. Featured below are pics of the graduation and of Andrew and Mallory-- just because I think they are so adorable.

In great motherly fashion, my mother arranged for Andrew and I to take pictures together in our caps and gowns. One year, two college graduates!

There once was a man with a wooden leg named Smith.

fyi, at the actual graduation, he was wearing a shirt and tie. Not a v-neck. I thought that was important to note.

and then Grandma Colleen exclaimed, "I never got to wear one of these when I graduated from high school!" (referring to a cap and gown of course), so then we held an impromptu high school graduation for my grandmother. Ain't she a gem?

Andrew's cap and gown was a little too big for Stephanie.

We tried to recreate an engagement picture pose. It didn't work.

The happy couple. Married 1 year and 7 months. I think they still like each other.

And then there was one.... person looking at the right camera. Dang it me. I always mess up the shot with my wandering eyes.

Andy-roo and Mal pal

If you don't know my brother, you should. He is the coolest. The. coolest. The best big brother a little sister could ask for. For real.

ALSO, my Moe graduated today--- we are now co-founders of the WHEDBDAWTBT Club, which stands for: "we have education degrees but don't actually want to be teachers." It is shortened to " WHBT (first two and last two letters) or, "we hate being teachers." It sounds harsh, but it makes sense.

But Congrats MOE! You are a rock star. And you have a cute little baby that I love to laugh at.

Other randoms:

1. Think of someone who you think might be obsessed with the royal wedding a little bit. If you thought of me, you are right. Yesterday I spent about 2 hours online trying to figure out what I'd have to do to get my masters degree in the UK... so I could go royal hunting on empty afternoons.

2. Can people stop writing song lyrics as their facebook status? It's seriously getting old. But hey, I'm not judging.

Love, Audrey

PS, I had to throw this little guy in, just so you can see how cute me and Andrew are (even though it's blurry).

So Graduation.

2011-05-02T15:57:00.000-07:00

I started writing this big, long, sentimental post about graduation, but then I decided that no one wants to read that crap. Plus, my blog has gone up like 10 sentimental points in the last year, and I can't allow that any longer.

Instead I am going to summarize and say, WAHOOOOOOO I'm home from Washington, D.C. and could not be happier about it, I'm moving back to Provo....any day I guess (I can't get enough of St. George for the time being), and I need a job.

Oh, and my cousin Nicole got married the day before graduation, and then, well, I graduated. Two days of ceremonies, reunions with besty friends, and a brief moment with President Cecil O. Samuelson, that homeboy of mine. Graduation was lovely- everything that I could have hoped for. I was sad to be graduating, but I've realized that if I am not forced to move on from something, I won't do it on my own. I just like to hang on to things too much. AND, I'm going to be a BYU alumnus forever, and what could be better than that? So I'm happy.

And now I've been in St. George for about two weeks, and it's fantastic. Get a load of the weather down here!!!! HOLY. I drive through town and I giggle about how great it is.

So here are some pictures:

The beautiful couple--- and my Uncle Mike doing the ceremony. Doesn't her hair look amazing?

I caught the bouquet. For the first time in my life. Please tell me that's a sign. haha.

My history teaching practicum friends. It was a blast to catch up with them-- we exchanged student teaching horror stories.

Jen and Annaka-- two of my history pals. YAY diplomas!

I have a lot of sisters now.

tiptoeing through the tulips. reference, anyone? It's worth about 10 bonus points.

Right after Rachelle and I took our normal-posed picture, we fell into hysteric laughter over my grandma's picture-taking habits. I like this picture better than the normal one.

O, Cecil. And look at the Mrs. She's looking away.

Oh my, this sign. I couldn't resist snapping a picture.

The adorable graduate. In her flattering hat.

So this awesome newly-married cousin of mine came to my graduation! Two days after the wedding!

I think that's it. And word to soul roommates: if you have a good copy of that picture we took at the end of commencement, send it my way. Por favor.

Loves.

O Dixie We Love Thee

2011-04-29T12:59:00.000-07:00

So I know I have a lot to catch up on, and don't worry, there are great posts in the works. But this post demands immediate attention.

You all know how much I love my alma mater, Dixie High School. I have school spirit steaming out my ears (still, after 5 years). Many of you also know about a lovely little tradition called the Bucket Run.

It's done once a year, on the Friday of "D Week," also known as, "D Day." Other D Day events include class olympics, a senior showoff talent show, and the ceremonial annual painting of the "DIXIE" on the Sugar Loaf (a red mountain just up from the Boulevard in St. George). Only the "Diamond D's" get to paint the Dixie. And you can guess that I was one of those lucky few.

me being lowered over the cliff.. to paint

So the Bucket Run is a relay race. Kind of. There's only one team. The current senior class competes with all senior classes before them. In 2006, when I was a senior, the record had just been beaten by the class of 2005 the year before. The race starts at the high school and goes up Main Street to the aforementioned Sugar Loaf. At the bottom of the mountain, there is some sort of device built by the current senior class to get the bucket to the top. In theory, the bucket holds the paint that will be used to paint the "Dixie." Within the last 40 or so years, though, they started using the same bucket every year, and just left the paint out. It was heavy and slowed people down. So they still use the same bucket and it's a duct taped and trashed. But so historic, right?
The following video is the 2006 Bucket Run. Yes, those are my classmates. Aren't they cool? ha.

Anyway, that's a little bit of the background.

This year is Dixie High School's centennial year. That makes this year's Bucket Run the 100th. For the Centennial Bucket Run, they did things a little bit different. First of all, they've had to update the route a little bit. A new road to the top of the hill was built, and we were able to maintain the old one for the past couple of years to maintain the integrity of the Bucket Run, but with the 100 year mark, the administration decided that it was a good time to give it up (which is sad, but you move on). But, with the new route, there has to be a new record. That means that the class of 2005 record stands-- and the 2011 Bucket Run sets the new record.

The second change is that the class of 2011 still did their thing, but running alongside them was a Bucket Run team of alumni. Yep, you guessed it. I. ran. the. Bucket. Run. Today. TODAY. I didn't run it when I was a senior because I'm, well, not a runner. I don't really run. They basically had try-outs and practices and it was all intense and despite my school spirit, I couldn't bring myself to participate and ruin it for everyone because of my incompetence. All the track/cross country/soccer/football people ran. You know, you have to be serious about these sorts of things if you want to claim the title (which we didn't anyway).

So I made my brother come with me. I picked him up this morning a little before 6, we met up with all the alumni (there were only about 33 of us), and then got in trucks to be dropped of at our spots along the relay. And I was SO nervous!!! What if I dropped the bucket??!?! WHAT IF?

Luckily, I didn't. I ran really hard (but probably not very fast), and was a little queasy after.

And you know what? We totally trashed the class of 2011. By like 18 seconds (I promise that's a long time). Poor high school kids. Beaten by mighty Dixie alumni. I was on the alumni team, and we STILL won. But do you know what that means? I was a member of the Bucket Run team that currently holds the record. I am a Bucket Run record holder. And honestly, not a lot of people can say that!!!

Me and brother-- on the top of the Sugar Loaf. Isn't my city beautiful? You can even see the "D" in the background.

After the race was over, we all met up on the Sugar Loaf-- and both teams got in a circle and sang our beloved high school hymn together ("O Dixie We Love Thee"). Precious moment.

I rock. The Bucket Run rocks. Dixie High School rocks. Yay 100 years of the happiness that is DHS.

And because I know you want more information on Dixie's centennial, you can go to the blog: http://dixie100.blogspot.com/. There is an awesome "This Day in Dixie history" calendar that shows events at Dixie High School from the past 100 years. I just want to shower presents upon whoever took the time to create this blog, because it is a masterpiece.

1 week

2011-04-08T15:34:00.000-07:00

I'm coming home a week from tomorrow. I'm not even going to try and explain how crazy that is.

But I have some randoms for today.

1. Casey Abrams, I knew that American Idol was going to deliver for me this year, but I didn't think it would be in the beardy, 19-year-old, and awkward form of you. (See "Your Song" from last week or "Have You Ever Seen The Rain" from this week.

2. I had a nightmare last night that caused me to-literally- yell out in anger and frustration. It woke up my roommate. She asked me if I was okay--- and then asked for an explanation of the dream. So I had a dream that my sister, Elise, was giving me a haircut, and she did a great job. But then my mom (whose hair salon we were in [sidenote: my mother is not a hair dresser and does not own a salon]), said she needed to fix the layers up a bit. So she did, and then I went into the back of the salon to look in the mirror and get a drink of water. I drank out of the sink and then looked up and gasped. My hair had been chopped to my chin. I immediately started hyperventilating and I couldn't speak right. My words came out in small shrieks and whispers-- no actual voice was coming through (because I was asleep, obviously), and I was SO frustrated because my Mom and Elise had not been alerted to my panic-- I wasn't loud enough. And so I finally YELLED, pointing to my head, "WHAT IS THIS???!!". And that's when I yelled out loud and woke myself, and my roommate, up.

(I've been a sleep talker for as long as I remember. All of my roommates, friends, cousins, and siblings have stories. This event, though, has caused me to think a bit deeper about my sleep talking habits. I did a little bit of research. Apparently sleep talking can either be caused by serious disorders (I think we can rule that out), or by stress, depression, fever, sleep deprivation, day-time drowsiness, and alcohol. Stress? check. Sleep deprivation? check. Day-time drowsiness? check. But all of those things haven't existed consistently my whole life. There must be something wrong with my brain. Maybe I'm like the guy on Phenomenon. Or maybe I'm just one of those people who sleep talks because she can't ever say as much as she wants to during the day).

3. A federal government shutdown is imminent, which means that the Cherry Blossom festivities I have been looking forward to this weekend will most likely be canceled. Poo on disagreement in Congress. The Constitution is hanging by a thread ya'll. Jk. haha But seriously.

4. I love talking to people who know me well. It is so draining to have to explain all the weird things I do to everyone around.

Example 1: In the mall yesterday, I was talking to Moe on the phone. I told her about some stuff I was looking at. She asked if I was going to buy anything. I said, I want to, but probably not, because, "you know how I do." She said yes, and we moved on. She knows that I have to try things on and think about them a lot before buying anything. But I didn't have to say any of that. And I didn't have to hear any comments about how weird that is.

Example 2: 2 days ago, while chatting to Meghan on the phone, my roommates suddenly alerted me to the fact that American Idol had started and the first contestant was singing a Michael Jackson song. I was off the phone very easily in approximately 3 seconds. A quick "Michael's on American Idol" and an "okay bye" was all the exchange necessary. She understands that these are two of the most important things, and all stops for them.

I'm just so excited to live with people again who will be expecting to go and do something fun on Friday night with me. Things just work better that way.

Until next time,

Audge

April Showers bring May flowers (Cherry Blossoms in particular).

2011-04-05T16:26:00.000-07:00

The District of Columbia is farther from my beloved St. George than I thought. In Washington, there are 39.9 inches of precipitation annually. In St. George there are 8.7 inches. I much prefer the latter. Rainy days=cloudy, sunless, and unhappy days--- and they mean that your shoes and socks and pant bottoms get really wet, and then they stay really wet and cold all day. It's very rude, actually.

But the showers bring the flowers, and I'm already seeing the affects.

So I had some adventures this weekend. It was the first time in 3 weeks that I actually was able to get out and do something on the weekend. The three weekends prior I spent all my time grading, planning lessons, and working on the dreaded teacher work sample. But because my student teaching career is quickly coming to an end (yes.), I have a little more time on my hands, and the weather (despite the loads of rain) is getting better (yes! again).

So I'm starting to enjoy myself a little more. The sad part about the new freedoms is that I am suddenly just about out of money. It's too bad I spent it all during the cold, rainy months, when the other thing to buy was consolation food. Consolation food is very, very bad on so many levels. For one, it makes you fatter. For another, it's still makes you fatter. Third, it's actually kind of expensive (Tom and Jerry's. How can they justify selling those tiny cartons for like $5 a piece? It's inhumane. But people like me buy them). Fourth, now I don't have money for the fun stuff, which is stupid. But whatevs. I have less than two weeks (WAHOOOOO) left, and then I'll hopefully be home and have a job. I can't WAIT to make money again.

So anyway, this weekend. It was a blast. Most of the time.

On Saturday morning I slept in (I hate getting up at 6:30 in the morning. I swear, it will be the death of me), and then me, Julie, and Angie went to a National's game!! The season opener was last week. I love baseball games. I should say that again with more enthusiasm, I LOVE BASEBALL GAMES!!! They mean summer and happiness and sunshine and more happiness. And cute boys in baseball uniforms.

So we bought our tickets and found our seats, and it was sunny and lovely and fun and THEN.

In an instant, the weather shifted to a TORNADO. Well, it might have been a hurricane.

One second there was laughter and cheesy music to be heard, and the next: people were screaming. The clouds had shifted instantaneously and let out a down pour of HAIL. Pelting hail and high MPH winds. We cowered in our seats (screaming ourselves), and once we emerged, the field was covered in a giant tarp, and the entire stadium was evacuated. No. Joke. The marquee had a delay message. We went behind the stadium to get out of the awfulness, and then after waiting in the cold and wet for about 20 minutes decided to bail. It was no longer worth it to wait for the game. This is what I'm talking about when I complain about the rain and awful weather in Washington. THIS is what I'm talking about.

The baseball field before the chaos

The baseball field AFTER. Big difference? I think so.

Julie and Angie DURING the chaos.

Who else's mascot is a giant Abe Lincoln head?

So we went to Eastern Market instead, which is one of my very favorite places. Most of the booths and shops were closed because of the weather, but we managed to buy some delicious mini donuts from a guy. And we found lunch at Good Stuff Eatery. Never has a hamburger and fries tasted so good.

That night we made our way to the waterfront between the Potomac and Anacostia Rivers. The Cherry Blossom Festival people sponsored a street party thing and fireworks. This evening event combined like 8 of my favorite things. 1) fireworks. 2) boats on the river. 3) glow sticks and festival people. 4) twinkly lights on the boats that were on the river. 5) adventures climbing over fences. 6) attempting to take pictures of said fireworks (I have still never been successful at that. And why do I even try?). 7) ice cream at Thomas Sweet in Georgetown following the firework adventure. 8) well, I still really loved the boats on the river.


These are the perfect seats me and Angie found to watch the fireworks from.

Summary of the evening on the river with the fireworks: it was a dream.

Note to future husband: I would like to be proposed to on a boat. In the middle of a river (or the ocean). During some fireworks. That would be nice.

The next morning I woke up to beautiful sunshine; the likes of which have rarely been seen since last fall. I took advantage of the loveliness and went on a long walk by myself before conference (don't worry, I still slept in until like 9:30. Conference wasn't until noon out here). I rode the metro to Arlington Nat'l Cemetery and then walked across the bridge to the Lincoln Memorial, all the way around the Tidal Basin, and then to L'Enfant Plaza to catch the train back home. I saw the Cherry Blossoms up close for the first time, and note to reader, they do not disappoint. They were gorgeous. There were A LOT of tourists, but I dealt with them-- I walked quickly and jumped out of many a picture. In total the walk was about 3.5 miles, and I loved every second of it. I talked to my mom and Moriah on the phone but mostly I just enjoyed the blossoms. And I am seriously in love with the Jefferson Memorial. I mean, I have been for years, but anyway.

Beautiful Arlington

I stuck my camera through the fence. This is the construction site for the new Martin Luther King, Jr. memorial, to be completed December 2011. (YIP!)

Snow on some random trees? No! They're cherry blossoms!

Hey TJ. I can see you poking out in there.

I loved the combination of Cherry Blossom and Willow. (fyi, see the tourists? They were swarming)

Addendum to the note to future husband above: How about a proposal in the Jefferson Memorial, during some fireworks, after rowing a romantic little boat across the Tidal Basin? And don't forget the twinkling lights.

So I had a good weekend. And this weekend is going to be awesome too. And then the next weekend (drumroll please), I'll be flying home, and saying goodbye to this amazing city for a third time.

It's going to be great.

And look out BB12. I've officially purchased Dani's contract. Save a kitchen cupboard for me, I'm coming home!

Call Me Crazy.

2011-03-30T20:13:00.000-07:00

So... I've been listening to Prince... lately.

I know you never thought I'd go there... I always knew I would.

Especially since the discovery of "Purple Rain" in 2009. Yep, that song for sure started it.

Some lyric gems (this is about 60% of why I listen):

From "Let's Go Crazy": (spoken) "...We are gathered here today... 2 get through this thing called... life." haha. So profound.
"I Would Die 4 You": "I'm not a woman. I'm not a man. I am something that you'll never understand." Yes Prince. You are. No one will ever understand.
"Kiss": "Act your age (not your shoe size)... not your shoe size." If I acted my shoe size I would be 7 and a half. I guess Prince doesn't like 2nd graders.

Anyway, I just thought I would share my current music listening habits with ya'll. I think it's a sure sign that I'm doing well. My crazy music habits are indicative of my well-being, I believe.

Once Upon A Time...

2011-03-26T21:39:00.000-07:00

... There was a girl named Audrey. She had a best friend named Rachelle.
(look out! This is a really long and cheesy post!)

Audrey and Rachelle first met at the tender age of 14. They were in two straight classes together at Dixie Middle School and bonded daily during their walk to the seminary building across the street. Audrey thought Rachelle was cool because she had a cell phone. Also, she always admired Rachelle's shoes. Rachelle was really smart and did gymnastics, and Audrey wanted to be just like her.

When the two of them were 15 they took a theater class together. Mr. Saxton and the loony drama kids only brought Rachelle and Audrey closer. They competed in the regional and state drama competitions together doing a scene from the "The Odd Couple." It was a really stupid scene. It required Audrey to wear frumpy mom sweats and Rachelle to squelch and scream like an out of control loony bird. Audrey and Rachelle practiced in the basement of the Doxey's house and the squelches could be heard in the upper floors. And when they competed, they somehow found it necessary to carry around like 5 folding chairs and 2 black blocks from room to room as props in their scene. However, dragging the furniture through the hallways at Hurricane High School was nothing compared to the creepy on-looking Hurricane kids. Audrey and Rachelle left the competition with a few mediocre competition scores in addition to confirmed rumors of Hurricane in-breeding.

At the end of their sophomore year Rachelle called Audrey one day with an invitation to go boating. Audrey replied with an exclamation in the affirmative, and Rachelle commented, "I have decided to make you my designated boating buddy, if you don't mind." Audrey didn't mind. She loved spending time with Rachelle, and well, she loved boating.

Several boating trips ensued. Lots of tubing, attempted wake-boarding (on Audrey's part), cliff jumping, more tubing, and an extraordinary amount of merriment accompanied the two.

Senior year, Rachelle and Audrey were in choir and drama together. Audrey was nervous to sing in front of Rachelle because of Rachelle's musical talents ;). Rachelle was somehow able to teach Audrey how to sing alto, and they sat together all year, laughing at the juniors who were really excited about choir and grades (guess who). Oh, those were the days. They also performed in Fiddler on the Roof together; Rachelle playing the lead (because of her talents, of course), and Audrey playing an ensemble role that allowed her to be involved, but still gave her plenty of time to do her homework in the hallway during performances. There was one scene, however, that Audrey and Rachelle were able to participate in together. During Sunrise, Sunset, Audrey and Rachelle always made eye contact and got a little teary when they imagined the show being over, and high school being over, which would eventually lead to their separation.

Rachelle and Audrey also joined each other on several school trips that year, which included the famed Choir Trip, the RASK Urban Experience Trip (of which Rachelle was in charge), and the senior trip to California. Each trip brought the friends closer together. On the Choir trip Rachelle shared her mittens her Audrey. On the RASK trip the friends found a random store in the Trolley Square mall that was selling hourglass sand things that looked really awesome. Because of its fascinating nature, Audrey and Rachelle committed a good 20 minutes of their lives to the device. The California trip was an altogether different bonding experience; Disneyland was a blast, but Magic Mountain was a bust. On the exhausted trip home, Audrey and Rachelle texted awkward and coded messages to Rachelle's boyfriend at the time--messages he still probably hasn't figured out (example: "The moon is bright tonight... with freckles." Rachelle, I hope you remember that one). They thought they were too hilarious for words.

After a year of separation while Rachelle attended her freshman year at BYU and Audey stayed at Dixie State, they decided to be roommates at BYU. Rachelle found them a place to live in Provo, and one day, Audrey took a call and left class to give Rachelle her credit card information to get the contract signed. Audrey had not even officially been accepted into BYU yet; but she wanted to live with Rachelle so bad (and she had no doubt that she was going to get in), that she signed a contract anyway.

...And so began a pattern of Rachelle finding housing for Audrey. Every place that Audrey lived at BYU is credited to Rachelle's finding (and in most cases, Rachelle signed the contract for Audrey while she was away).

It is hard to describe the perfection that was Audrey and Rachelle as roommates, but I shall attempt it in list format.

1) Rachelle helped Audrey function in normal society (example: Rachelle made me stop wearing my CTR ring on my wedding ring finger. Go figure) and Audrey helped Rachelle remember the small but significant details of her life (Rachelle: Audrey, did I pass the AP Bio test? Audrey: Yes, you got a 3. (Audrey distinctly remembers sitting at the Doxey's kitchen counter looking at Rachelle's new macbook and calling the AP Board the moment scores were released)).

2) Rachelle and Audrey live very independent lives. They both have their own plans and like to do their own thing. Their daily activities varied greatly; they were on different ends of campus, they had different friend group outside of the roommates, and they had different time-consuming jobs. Somehow, though, they were always able to meet up at bed time to settle in at about the same time. Never had either person known such remarkable and entertaining pillow talk. It kept the pair of them up for hours and hours, way past their bed time. They would lay there in the dark and giggle ("well that's just FANTASTIC!!"), and their roommates would complain and bang on the wall. In their junior year, when they didn't share a room, they enjoyed pillow talk time in the living room, looking up at the Christmas lights that hung around the room all year long.

3) Rachelle was really good at telling Audrey all of her problems, particularly boy problems, and Audrey was really good at listening and supporting, but never telling her what to do. Audrey just knew that there were some things that Rachelle had to figure out on her own (like the fact that she didn't actually like that one boy, and that she knew deep down that she was going to break up with him eventually). Rachelle was always really good at making Audrey spill the beans. Audrey is really bad at talking about her honest feelings. But Rachelle was really good at giving advice and making Audrey feel secure. Rachelle was very good at making Audrey feel good about herself. She was very supportive of everything Audrey did. After Audrey got a good grade on her first test at BYU, Rachelle made her a cake to celebrate.

4) Somehow Rachelle has always been very good at reading Audrey and knowing what she is thinking and feeling, even before Audrey knows it. Exhibit A: When Audrey decided not to go on a mission (against her life plan, mind you), she called Rachelle to tell her. Rachelle calmly responded: "I know." Audrey: "WHAT?! Why didn't you tell me??!" (telling would have saved Audrey a lot of stress and effort). Rachelle: because you needed to figure it our on your own. But Audrey, why do you think I haven't purchased housing for the fall? Because I was waiting for you." Oh Rachelle, always the smart, intuitive one.

And so Audrey and Rachelle lived together at BYU as roommates-- as an old married couple-- that relied on each other for just about everything.

In the meantime, they also did all sorts of other fun stuff.

Rachelle showing off her mad cartwheel skills

They took a vacation together to Washington, D.C., which was only the dream of Audrey's life (see post #1 of this blog). The two of them ran (literally) around Washington for 6 days, seeing a lot more than the average tourists do on their first trip to DC. Audrey realized later, on her other trips to DC, that after what she had seen with Rachelle, there really wasn't that much left. That's how much they saw. They got really sore feet and were very, very exhausted, but were also highly entertained by the common and not-so-common attractions: tourist families with matching plaid shorts, the chipmunks that Rachelle refused to recognize as squirrels ("Aren't they the same thing?!"), and the many reflective surfaces around the city that served as perfect photo-ops.

They spent a week in Palm Desert, California and basked in the sunlight (and got really tan), went to the gym and worked out for a surprisingly long period of time (yay 0 elevation) played board games, watched Ironman way too many times, and made fun of Joshua Tree National Park. Oh yes, and they also went to Tiffany's and looked at diamonds. Rachelle loves diamonds, and Audrey has been lucky enough to be exposed to the world of diamonds through Rachelle. Thanks to Rachelle, Audrey is very well-versed in diamond language.

They exchanged books, movies, and TV shows. Audrey and Rachelle love to talk about books. Audrey likes to read books and then make Rachelle read them. They also enjoyed watching Friends, 30 Rock, and the occasional Gossip Girl episode together. They tried not to watch Gossip Girl most of the time, but it was too addicting.

They developed a list of rules for their life that include the Rule of the Evil Hour of 6, the "It's okay to be late for most things" Rule, and the "You don't actually have to eat meat if you don't want to" Rule. The most-often broken rule, I think, is the one that states, "Always go to bed when you're tired, and sometimes, go to bed before you are tired." The two of them are really bad at going to bed when they are tired. See this post for the other rules, if you are curious.

Rachelle and Audrey are no longer roommates. They can't be. Rachelle went off and got herself a man. And she married him. Audrey was left with other awesome roommates and more adventures to have on her own, but she misses Rachelle.

The truth is, Audrey needs that Rachelle. She just does. And she is so grateful for her friendship. And for the fact that Rachelle really knows Audrey. She understands.

Quick list of other things I love about Rachelle:
1. She has a snuggie.
2. She is a super hard worker. She is not afraid to put in the effort to get what she wants.
3. She has a fantastic shoe collection.
4. She asked for Star Trek for Christmas.
5. She has a different color of hair in like every picture she's in.
6. She was really good at getting me to go to the gym.
7. She likes all sorts of random music. Sometimes she's in a Ne-Yo mood, sometimes All-American Rejects. Sometimes country. But she always like Billy Joel.
8. She listens to all my crazy stuff and just laughs at me.
9. She totally appreciates it when I scrapbook roommate stuff. She always wants to see the new pages I make. That makes all the work worth it. :)
10. She taught me how to rinse everything completely before putting it into the dishwasher. And how to use plates all time. Especially for toast. She hates it when there are crumbs on the counter.
11. One time we bought a hot pad for our kitchen together. Just one of them. Just because.
12. She let me drive her car all the way to St. George once- she was in the passenger seat. She needed a break.
13. She often goes along with my crazy ideas-- but she also puts a check on them too.
14. She leaves really, really long phone messages that I actually really entertaining to listen to.
15. She likes to make piles of clothes like I do. And she never got mad at me when my side of the room was a disaster area (as it often was).

So happy birthday, my darling. And thanks for being you.

Abandoned

2011-03-23T17:50:00.000-07:00

I have abandoned this blog lately. So this post is just to announce that yes, I am still alive. Stressed-out? Exhausted? Over-worked? Homesick? Stronger than before? More dedicated? A better person? All yes. the answer is yes.

Student teaching is hard. I can't say that enough. And for most of this time I've been a student teacher I thought it was too hard. There was definitely an extended period of time that I didn't think I could do it-- and honestly, I think that's the first time in my life that I have thought that. I've always thought that I could do anything- in fact, I've been known to say, "they say you can't do it all. But I can." The trial of student teaching made me doubt the foundations of who I am. I wanted to go home multiple times. So bad. Heck, I still want to go home. I've never been more excited about anything in my entire life- including when Harry Potter 7 came out. I can't explain, and don't want to explain what is so hard about it. But I promise that's it just hard across the board. It's kind of a best-kept secret in the education world. Talk to anyone. Very rarely will you find someone that actually enjoyed their student teaching experience.

The good thing is that I've reached the summit, so to speak. Miley Cyrus's "The Climb," comes to mind. I don't love it. There are moments when I like it. And it's become one of those things that you just have to make the most of and get through. Throughout this semester I've gone from a very negative attitude to a hopeful one. I swear, there has been a serious transformation-- an emergence from a very dark tunnel to a significantly brighter afternoon.

So most of the time I'm just too tired to really think about anything, and then I have to plan another lesson or grade another research paper. It's all-consuming. Student teaching becomes life. Which is fine, except I feel guilty all the time, because I'm in this place that I love, but I don't have the time or energy to enjoy it. And I'm counting down the days until I leave it. I hate that. I love this place. It has brought me so much happiness in the past. But now I associate it with the stress of student teaching and I get a bad taste in my mouth. Is that not awful? Last Friday, though, I went to Georgetown for shopping and dinner with my roommate Julie. And it was a warm, sunny day (just about the first one this year). I was so happy. I remembered why I love this place, and I wanted to stay. So conclusion: I still love the city. I still love being here. I just want to finish student teaching and never think about it again. Ever.

So that's the status of my feelings right now. As of tomorrow after school, I will have exactly 3 weeks until I'm done with this. And two days after that I will fly home to St. George, into the loving arms of my mommy and daddy. And my mom has already promised to make me cinnamon rolls when I get home.

And then I'll be in Northern Utah on April 19th. My lovely lovely cousin Nicole is getting married on April 20. And then I graduate. The next day. Wow. Graduation. And then I think I'm going to live in Provo. For the summer at least.

And then that's where the story ends. That's when the plan is over. I don't know what's going to come next. But you know what? That's okay. At this point I can deal with a couple weeks of chill. A couple weeks of no plans and no pressure. I'll get bored pretty fast, I'm sure. But for right now, I can't imagine anything more awesome.

TOP 3

2011-02-28T12:44:00.000-08:00

Have you seen the polls today?????

I could not be happier. March is going to be a good month for basketball.

I think my friends like having me around.

2011-02-26T14:46:00.000-08:00

I present to you, FOR LIKE EVER VALENTINE'S PARTY 2011.

Hosted by the legendary partiers of Banbridge 12.

I wasn't there is person, but I was very obviously there in Popsicle stick and blow-up picture form. And I'm not positive, but I think Lene was responsible for this awesomeness.

This is why I love my friends so much.

Thanks guys.

(PS, I also made a cameo appearance at the BYU game right after Valentines day):

the changing of ways.

2011-02-23T19:15:00.000-08:00

caution: if you haven't seen The Social Network don't read this.

I watched The Social Network last night. I was captivated in like the first minute. I loved it.

here's why:
1. It captures the selfishness and arrogance of man. There isn't a good guy. I wasn't sure who to root for the whole time... which is frustrating... but also terribly thought-provoking. (It's like Ayn Rand style, which is fascinating).
2. Because of the exposure of the ill-intentioned beginnings of "The Facebook" I find it remarkable how much of our lives run on the internet-particularly on Facebook. We spend hours and hours (over time, of course) on this website that put our social lives online, for the world to see. But it was created in such a shady way-- by people who were quite power hungry, arrogant, and snotty. That Mark Zuckerberg guy just wanted glory. His friend was loyal and kind, but he just wanted money. Sean Parker, the Napster guy, manipulated the whole thing to turn the tables in his favor. And those deep-voiced extremely good-looking twins were scammed but then came back with a vengeance. And we worship this.... idea. We depend on Facebook for a lot of social interaction.
3. These manipulative, selfish people created something that could possibly do- and does- a lot of good. It helps us keep in touch with people. It helps us wish our friends happy birthday. Share pictures. Brighten someone's day with a "hello." It is a mode of research-- you can contact thousands of people in an afternoon, and a large portion of them will respond. It can help us spread the gospel-- share our religion. So much good can come from this... idea.

Oh the dichotomy.

In the after-moving-watching-research that I performed, I learned all about social culture and clubs at Harvard (a particularly interesting point in the movie), and I read a bit about Mark Zuckerberg. I found a poll on Facebook that asked, "will Mark Zuckerberg watch The Social Network at the premiere?" Surprisingly, most people said he wouldn't bother to see it. After watching the movie, if his person is represented correctly, I can understand that perspective. Someone else wrote, "he'll probably watch the movie and then say it's fiction."

I think that reaction is more likely. The guy is a weasel.

And PS, I'm still kind of sickened by Justin Timberlake because of the character that he plays in the movie. I hate that guy. But I love Justin.

Maybe

2011-02-19T17:52:00.000-08:00

1. What if I just changed my major? Started over again? I don't want to be done. I like school too much. There are just so many more things I want to learn. Students are lucky because they have the opportunity to spend all their time learning new things. I was a stupid student. I focused on one major WAY too early, and never even took fun classes where I could learn extra cool stuff. I always wanted to take a creative writing class. I never did. I always wanted to take sailing. and piano. and English language classes where you talk about phonetics and grammar. And I always had this secret desire to take Calculus. Just so I could say that I knew it. I always liked math. And Pre-calc was a blast. And I should have taken a language. Like what if I would have stuck with either Spanish or Sign Language? Both would be cool to know. And I loved taking BOTH of those languages.

I don't know what I want to be. Right now being a teacher sounds 100% like the worst idea ever. I just want to go to school. All the time. And not work. And I don't want to be at the front of the classroom. I want to blend in as the student who gets to learn things. And not history. I'm currently sick of history. I don't care. I makes me sick to think about it, actually. Yes, I know that's dramatic. But it's true.

2. I just got finished watching a movie on Netflix called "One Crazy Summer." It combined five of my favorite things of all time:

the 80's teenager movie
John Cusack
Summer
Sailing (yep, still never been. But I'm in love with the idea of it.)
The Beach Boys (seriously like half the soundtrack)

can you get any better than this? Maybe if you add Duckie's character from Pretty in Pink and some Michael Jackson.

3. I'm obsessed with Justin Bieber lately. I heard some girls at school talking about Never Say Never. I told them that I've seen it. One of the girls goes, "Are you a Beleiber??!!?" Yes, I proudly replied. Yes. I loved the movie, and I bought both of his CDs when I got home. And I want to see the movie again SO bad. SO BAD.

4. I bought myself a present yesterday. It was my 3rd trip to American Eagle to look at it and try it on again, so I finally just bought it. And you know what? I think it SCREAMS Audrey. Like anyone who walked into American Eagle and saw it (who knows me) would think, "Audrey should own that windbreaker." Here it is. It's actually kind of a khaki green even though it looks gray in the picture. But picture me wearing navy blue bermudas, little white keds (or the Sperrys that I want), and a white t-shirt underneath. Perfect summer night Audrey outfit. I love it.

The Constitution say WHAT?!

2011-02-17T08:23:00.000-08:00

We did a Constitutional Convention in my government class last week. I played George Washington and led the convention. It was nothing short of an adventure.

Each student was given a specific role- a real person who had been at the convention. They were required to adopt that person's perspective and make arguments for certain things.

We used proper parliamentary procedure, the debates were fair, and the voting only happened after everyone had agreed that it was time to vote. There were equal delegates from each perspective, so the point was for each group to come to a compromise, and then the class-made Constitution would turn out similar to the REAL U.S. Constitution.

But this is what happened:

Not only will our country allow slavery for eternity, but we will elect a president who will remain in office HIS ENTIRE LIFE.

So, let's enslave human beings and elect a dictator. Nice. Did anyone say Nazi Germany?

This is what happens when the most talented and forward debaters of the class are assigned similar perspectives. oops. They overpower the weaker, more reasonable delegates.

But seriously, is this how bad government happens? Is this what comes of dominant personalities who all share the same idea? They can easily overpower those who are not willing to speak up. The weak are crushed. Inequality reigns. Imagine if this had been the case at the REAL Constitutional Convention. What would we have ended up with? What if there hadn't been compromise? This is why the Constitution and the organization of our unique federal government is such a miracle-- and further evidence of providential inspiration in its framing.

But isn't the ease of corruption a scary thought? It is just that easy to get off track.

Anyway.

Other randoms about student teaching and Washington DC in general:
1. The wind is so cold that it eats your face. Well, chews it up and then leaves the exposed flesh as it moves by.
2. When I woke up at 6:15 on Monday morning this week, one word went through my mind repeatedly: WHY?
3. My students think they are liberal because they live in DC and their parents are liberal. However, they are actually quite conservative. This lends credibility to my theory that the human being is conservative in its natural state.
4. We watched "Pleasantville" in one of the other government classes. Two things about that: 1) this movie would never be shown in Utah schools without a permission slip. I felt awkward. 2) The movie-- and the cooperating teacher for that class-- paint conservatism like it is INSANE and inhibits freedom and individual liberties. It made conservative values seem backward and old fashioned. It made me sick a little bit. At least that's the way the discussion went.
5. Quoted by a student in the AP US class that I observed today: "Yeah, flappers were definitely the first hipsters." Said boy is accused of being a hipster at least once a day.
6. I went to the DC temple last night. It's my second time going since I've been here. The ward schedules temple nights, but they are only endowment sessions. But I went with the ward anyway. I needed the feeling of it. The peace and security. So while everyone was in a session, I went down to the baptistry and asked if I could walk in. They let me, and I joined a youth group. It was such a blessing, I can't even say. I finished in about an hour, and had lots of time to kill before the session would be over. So I went to the visitor's center. I think the DC visitor's center might be my favorite of all time. I just sat in front of the Christus and gathered strength. Teaching is hard. Being at that school is hard and stressful, and I needed to just sit there and soak in the Spirit. Unfortunately, by the time I sat down the visitor's center was closing. They let me stay while they cleaned, though. I felt like the whole evening was a series of tender mercies- people at the temple making things work even though I was kind of an inconvenience to everyone. It was such a blessing. I feel so much better about life in general.
7. My US history students are awesome. I really like them. They are funny-- and so polite. They do their homework, and I need to stop being surprised about it. We talked about WW2 propaganda and the Zoot Suit Riots this week. Next week I'm covering the War in the Pacific and the end to the war-- the United Nations and the Atomic Bomb. But I have a really hard time planning for these kids. They are smart and I feel like just telling them what happened in a fun way won't challenge them and then I will be a failure. It's harder than I ever imagined to find ways to bring in higher order thinking and get a good discussion while delivering information at the same time. There is just so much to think about all the time, and it can be very discouraging.

I think that's all I have to say.

I'm really looking forward to the 3 day weekend.

Yep. And after tomorrow I will only have 7 weeks left. And 3 of those weeks are only 4-day weeks. And one of the other ones has an assembly. And another one has an early dismissal. So really only TWO of them are full with no interruptions. Man I'm excited to be done. Monday was the 2-months-left mark. Hip hip hooray!

Soup. Or Bowl.

2011-02-07T15:37:00.000-08:00

Have you ever thought about the Super Bowl, like, conceptually?

Consider it for a moment.

We have about five months of NFL football season. Each team plays like once a week, they have stats and rankings and records, and then there's the playoffs. And everyone- but mostly men- pay attention a little bit, mostly to their favorite team, but generally to the whole league. Interest varies among people-- some really, really care for most of the season. Some lose interest when their team is losing. Some pick up interest when an underdog (aka the Packer's as the wildcard this year) starts doing well.

BUT. Then there is the Super Bowl. The Championship game that virtually everyone in the country suddenly cares about. It generally doesn't matter which teams are playing. Everyone watches the game anyway. Suddenly football is not just about a modern-day gladiatorial game, but about commercials and halftime shows. About chips and dip and various game foods. About community and hanging out with friends-- all to enjoy a game whose players that a couple weeks before were yet to be undetermined.

It's just a strange concept. A unifier among Americans.

A couple months ago I got into an argument with two sports crazed young men-- Michael Everton and Seth Frischknecht-- about what was more influential and binding and inspirational in the world throughout history, music or sports. I obviously argued for the music side. Both sides are arguable, but I think a single song can be more far reaching than a single sporting event (they had a really good point with the Olympics. I had a good point with the tribal African songs that bound African American slaves to their homeland culture while working the fields). The argument got rather fierce, and I'm pretty sure they said some things that they [should] regret.

But to prove that I see the validity of their argument, and even support them in a big way, I present the phenomenon of the Super Bowl. Rarely is there a single sporting event that unifies the country in such a way. The Super Bowl really is a unique and special event- if only because it brings the country together.

(PS, the title of this post comes from the Boy Meets World episode when Shawn has to get super bowl tickets to get a passing grade in Mr. Feeny's class. This is where Shawn utters the famous words, "I try so hard to do everything. But there is always an Eskimo standing in my way." In this particular episode, Shawn pushes past that Eskimo standing in his way and makes it to the Super Bowl. Life lesson learned.)

Fire?

2011-01-29T05:48:00.000-08:00

This morning my roommate Angie came into my room and said, "the fire alarm is going off in the hall. Do you think we should go down?"

1st instinct: no. I'm sleeping.
2nd instinct: Eh, maybe we should check.

Angie volunteered herself to bundle up and go outside to see if the fire alarm was legitimate (looking back, I have no idea why it wouldn't be authentic. It was 8:00am. Not exactly the perfect time for a drill. And there are no crazy high schoolers trying to be annoying on purpose running around the building). When she got to the bottom of the 8 flights of stairs, she called us and confirmed that there were lots of people outside and that we should come too.

I dragged myself out of bed. Ick. I wore long johns to sleep last night, so going in my pajamas was the worst idea known to man. I took the time to change my clothes, and as I was changing I started to panic. What if there were an actual fire? What if I lost all my stuff? My clothes and everything? I dressed carefully, choosing only my favorite things to wear. I ended up with light-colored jeans, my BYU basketball shirt, and my BYU sweatshirt. I guess we can see where my priorities are. Yeah Audrey, wear a bunch of stuff that can be replaced. Good idea.

In further preparation of panic, I put on my high school class ring. I threw my three favorite journals, my Book of Mormon, my teddy bear, and my computer (along with other necessaries from my purse: iPod, camera, keys, phone, wallet, etc), into my backpack. I was the last one out.

But as I reached for the doorknob... the building went silent. The alarm had turned off. I retreated my hand, turned around, put my pajamas back on, and now I'm back in bed. Except that I started thinking about this post, so I had to sit up and pull my computer out of my backpack.

Was my panic odd? Maybe. But it is classic Aud. Like, of course I would pack all my favorite and most valuable things into my backpack in a moment of rush. Of course.

When I was about 9, I for some reason (I have yet to find the source) became deathly afraid that my house was going to burn down. I used to have nightmares about it. I seriously used to have dreams that Nazis came to take me and my family away, and then for good measure, they would burn everything.

I was terrified. Absolutely terrified. My mom tried to remedy the situation. She bought a fire escape ladder and put it in my bedroom closet. She taught me how to use it in case of a fire. It only made things worse. (and one time, Elise and I tried to use it to escape from Andrew and Stephanie when were babysitting. We got in major trouble for that one. Apparently we're not allowed to climb onto an icy roof in an attempt to run away from home) There was a picture on the front of the box of some children and their mother climbing down a ladder with threatening fire bursting out of the bedroom window they had climbed from. The kids looks so calm, and I just thought they were nuts.

Then my mom planned a family home evening where were learned about fire safety and did fire drills from all different situations in our house. We mapped everything out and everyone got a job. We practiced and practiced.

You would think this was a great idea. You know, be prepared. My 9-year-old brain, however, thought that all the practicing and preparation just meant that a fire in the house was a legitimate concern and that it was actually going to happen, and soon. My fears reached a climax that night.

I packed all of my favorite things into my backpack and slept on the floor of my parents room, with the backpack on. I got up for school the next day, and took it all with me. If the house was going to burn down while I was at school, It was not going to lose my vtech learning computer or my new 100-color box of crayons. Or my tweety bird.

I guess that today I was reminded of that terror from years ago. I am still terrified. Illogically so. I think I may place too much value in random material things. Like I'm too sentimental about stuff. But then again, I don't see any problem in trying to save my journals and scrapbooks. Or my favorite BYU sweatshirt. And my class ring is irreplaceable.

And the conclusion is that I need to either be more prepared, or not care as much. Because honestly, if the fire today would have been at all threatening, I probably would have lost things more important than my backpack of valuables.

Best public service announcement ever.

2011-01-26T19:55:00.001-08:00

Thursday, January 27, 2011: DC Public Schools will be closed.

I get to sleep in tomorrow. I love the snow. Love it.

take that.

2011-01-24T14:15:00.000-08:00

Video Courtesy of KSL.com

I'm getting nervous for Wednesday's game--- #9 BYU against #4 SDSU. This video made me feel better.

And check out this article: http://sportsillustrated.cnn.com/vault/article/magazine/MAG1181209/1/index.htm

Steven Tyler might be my all-time favorite American Idol judge.

2011-01-19T19:20:00.001-08:00

#9

2011-01-17T20:27:00.000-08:00

BYU boys basketball. #9 in the polls, ya'll.

And I went to Philadelphia today and basked in the glory of Independence Hall and all sorts of history nerd stuff.

My roommates. Hanging on the fence by Benjamin Franklin's final resting place.

And I planted a mini chia pet that my mom gave me. My roommates made fun of me.

And I spent the entire 3-hour drive home from Philly singing at the top of my lungs to my favorite songs. And I don't even think that the other people in the car were annoyed.

AND I hung up my Justin Bieber poster.

My semester is looking up.

Yeah. This happened.

2011-01-13T20:20:00.000-08:00

This week, in the DC, I had a little setback.

I had some wrist pain on Saturday... that increased exponentially until Monday morning when I could no longer move my wrist- or fingers- because of the pain. And I actually shed tears.

I went to the doctor and after two hours of waiting, explained my situation to the doctor:
"So, I don't know what happened... my wrist just started hurting. I didn't injure it. The only thing I can think of is that I moved and pulled some heavy suitcases all week last week. Oh, and I broke that wrist when I was 6. And, did I forget to say that it hurts like, really bad?"

The doctor was of very little help. The x-ray said nothing. After my 4-hour visit to the urgent-care clinic that I found online and found a ride to, the doctor sent me home with a brace, a prescription, and no information.

(sidenote: I hate taking medication. I feel like medicine (not antibiotics) doesn't actually make you better, it just makes you feel like you are better until you actually get better. And I don't like it when I feel fake better. I don't like not knowing what it's supposed to actually feel like. I know that's weird.)

So I got home and didn't fill my prescription. I iced my poor wrist, took some ibuprofen, and took a 2-hour nap.

The next day it hurt worse. I didn't sleep that night, you know, because it hurt so bad. And it was dang hard to get ready in the morning. Try putting a ponytail in your hair with one hand. Imagine me, Audrey, using one hand to put my nylons on for my first day of student teaching on Tuesday. Imagine my 5 whole minutes of agony. And then imagine going to some inner-city schools in Washington, D.C. and meeting intimidating administrators who give your broken wrist a firm handshake. Imagine holding in the scream.

It was a rough couple of days. I even called my brother and cried. Sobbed while walking down the street in Foggy Bottom after my first day. I sat on the metro with red puffy eyes and avoided looking at my fellow passengers.

What the heck is wrong with my wrist? What. the. heck. And besides the heck, what the RANDOM, right?

I gave up the no-prescription-medicine-charade on Wednesday afternoon. My happiness has increased dramatically since then. I slept last night. The whole night. No midnight trips to the bathroom for more painkillers or trips to the kitchen for ice bags.

Improvements of today:
1. I buttoned my pants this afternoon with apparent ease.
2. I carried something.
3. I cracked an egg. With both hands.
4. I slowly texted with both of my thumbs.
5. I'm typing. Right now. With two hands (one in the brace of course)

Tomorrow my goal is to:
1. Apply lotion to my left arm (with my right hand)

So I'm in a positive, stabilized position at this time. But I think it's fake. My wrist feels better because I'm taking a strong pain killer and anti-inflammatory to stop the swelling (see picture below). So I guess I'll keep you updated on that.

Comparison of Audrey's wrists and hands. TOP: normal hand. Bottom: NOT NORMAL. Notice the two missing knuckles on the bottom hand due to swelling. And the lump on the left side of the wrist that is only slightly visible.

My experience in DC round 2 has been... a little rough at times. I am anxious to see how things turn out.

BTdub, I am still terrified of student teaching.

And there were like 5 large hiccups in my placement. Hopefully (and thankfully) they are overcome. It's been a little bit stressful to say the least. And I have been very, very sad, and very, very mad way too many times. I think I'm generally a fairly emotionless person, unless that emotion is happy, excited, or sincerely content but sleepy. It's been a ride. A wild ride. :)

But I love love love my roommates. They are Jetette Super Great. Aimee is my room-roommate. We have some great pillow talk, which I love. And all the girls support my ice cream addiction. Last night, when I was having such a hard time, my girls went down to the convenience store in the basement of our apartment building and bought me a pint of Red Velvet special edition ice cream, and then we sat in a circle and talked it all out.

Jackpot

2011-01-09T17:27:00.000-08:00

One of my new roommates has the last two seasons of Boy Meets World on her computer. I don't know how or where she got them, because those seasons are not available on DVD. BUT, we have been watching season 6 the last couple of days. All 6 of us. We huddle up in our freezing apartment that still doesn't have furniture (hopefully Tuesday), and set up a computer and speakers on a chair so that the view is good for everyone. And see watch several episodes in a row. And with every on I proclaim, "OH! I love this one!!" And everyone is amazed that I know what episode it is just by the title.

It's heavenly bliss.

Boy Meets World is one of those things that my family loves. We quote BMW more often than not. And watching the show here in VA is like getting a sweet taste of home. There's nothing like a dose of Eric Alison Matthews. Nothing.

Special Collections, in memoriam

2011-01-08T17:26:00.000-08:00

I worked in the L. Tom Perry Special Collections in the Harold B. Lee Library at Brigham Young University for about 18 months. I loved working there (almost all the time). I made a lot of friends and I learned a lot of really cool stuff. I love looking through the collections, and I love organizing things. AND, I loved working for my supervisor, John Murphy. I think he might actually be the nicest guy in the world. So, I want to pay homage to my ex-employers.

My favorite collections (that I worked on)
1. The George Q. Cannon family correspondence
2. Nellie Gubler family papers
3. Clinton Larson papers
4. That one collection of WW2 letters from Hunkey and Punkey

My work buddy was Liz. Liz Ballif. My very favorite person to talk to in the morning. We had a blast together. And seriously, she was amazing at listening to all my weird and often boring stories. For hours.

All summer long we worked almost 8 hours a day. We sat there and read obituaries or worked on whatever our assigned collection was, and chatted away. For hours and hours and hours.

But we did often find ourselves bored and tired of sitting in our little room (put a big emphasis on the word "often"). So we made a list of things to do for "refreshment."

1. walk in place
2. eat raisins (Liz brought them)
3. visit work flows (that's the place you go if you have questions or have a new project to turn in)
4. bathroom break
5. get a drink
6. take a trip to receiving (that's where they keep all the office supplies at the library. We used to go there for post-it notes)
7. Undergo massive reorganization of the storage area and update all our inventory of collections.
8. Take about a 30 second break to check our email (I don't think that was allowed.)

We recorded memorable quotes on post-it notes and stuck them on the wall
Quotes on the wall:
1. Geoff: "You don't know how hard it is to be a boy!" (followed by uproarious laughter) (Geoff was the employee of the century. He ran everything. He knew the answer to everything. Even the curators would refer us to Geoff when we asked them questions. He had been working there for like 5 years. Yeah, super duper senior. And he also came by our office to tell us all sorts of "interesting" things that we didn't actually want to hear about (like ants or the history of typesetting). I adored the boy though. Loved his visits. They were my favorite.)
2. Audrey: "I am the person I am today because of Harry Potter."
3. Liz: "People who pretend they don't like Zac Efron because they want to be different just bug me."
4. Moroni Jensen collection (LTPSC, HBLL, BYU) "The best bridge between despair and hope is a good night's sleep." (this quote was our light at the end of the tunnel. We knew that we could go home from a long and miserable day at work, take a nap, and then be as good as new)

We also have a wall where we put new grammar rules that Liz learned in her English language classes.
AND Liz went through a phase where she loved dinosaurs. So we both enjoyed our share of dinosaur jokes.

How do you ask a tyrannosaurus out to lunch? Tea, Rex?
Why do museums have old dinosaur bones? Because they can't afford new ones.
*stupid* Why did the dinosaur get in bed? because it was tired.
What do you do when a dinosaur sneezes? get out of the way.

and then a Christmas joke:
*stupid* Who do dasher and dancer get to take a lot of coffee breaks? because they're santa's "star bucks!"

(we had to start labeling the stupid ones when we left them for each other on post-its so we didn't try too hard to understand the ones that you aren't supposed to "get.")

And then this school year, we got a new employee buddy in our office. Pete. A recently returned missionary from Orderville, Utah. He is everything that being from a small Utah town implies and more. He was a delight. An interesting delight. I loved working with Pete.

Some more reasons why I loved working there:
1. I pretty much made my own hours.
2. I came in "late" about every day. It didn't actually matter when I arrived. So I came in roughly around 9.
3. Sometimes the library throws parties for their employees. And gives them presents.
4. I had the opportunity to be on the Student Library Advisory Council for a semester. We didn't do much, but it was fun, and I got free lunch every other Friday.
5. The people in workflows had treats on Friday, and they shared with us.
6. The reference people let me check out books under the name of the curator I worked for and I could take them back to my office to do research instead of sitting in the reading room. (this was work-related research, not personal)
7. We had training meetings every other Thursday at eleven. I went through the same trainings 3 times. But they were entertaining. Usually they consisted of a lot of grumbling, no one answering the questions (except for Geoff, who would cave and give the answer after no one else said anything), and an hour of getting paid for doing no actual work.
8. Sometimes I got to shred paper. Or make copies. I love officey things.
9. My friend Jen Bruton worked at the front desk. So I came in to work every morning and talked to her for like ten minutes before retreating to my office.

Anyway, I loved working at the Special Collections. And it was such a privilege to work there. I'm proud to say that I was an employee there. I am so grateful for that opportunity.

2010?

2011-01-08T16:46:00.000-08:00

I wrote this a couple weeks ago but forgot to post it. I hesitate to even post it... but I hate leaving posts as drafts. Anyway.

What I loved in 2010:
1. Queen and Mr. Mercury-- like by a lot. I literally only listened to Queen everyday all day from about May to October. I ordered 7 studio albums online and was able to collect and memorize around 120 songs. My favorites, in order of when I loved them, have been: "Don't Stop Me Now " (which started the craze, mind you), "Too Much Love Will Kill You," "Let Me Live," "Made in Heaven," "I Want to Break Free," "Save Me," "Cool Cat," and finally, I settled on "Sail Away Sweet Sister," a little known track title from the 1980 album that I'm absolutely in love with and could still listen to all day. There are about 10 seconds of that song that are pure beauty, and when I listen to it, I repeatedly rewind and listen to that part.
2. "Speechless" by Michael Jackson. It's on the 2001 album, and I am embarrassed to say that it took me until this summer to discover it. And there is hardly any song, ever, that is more beautiful than this one.
3. "Just a Dream" by Nelly. This song dominated my listening for a week. I listened to it on repeat every time I sat down to do, well, anything. It was good to have some Nelly back in my life. Seriously.
4. "Teenage Dream," as featured on Glee. I'm aware that the message of this song isn't exactly pure. But I was instantly addicted to this man's voice. Instantly.
5. Robert Downey, Jr. You remember this one? I watched all of his movies that are not rated R this summer. Mostly with Lynne, but a lot of it was on my own. And I discovered a new movie that I love love love. "Heart and Souls." It is incredibly heartwarming and good for the soul.
6. The BYU 66th Ward. This should actually go at the top. I was obsessed with these guys this summer. We spend every day together. Planning and doing all sorts of stuff. I would always want to go home to St. George and visit my family, and I did on some weekends, but I also dreaded going. Every time I left Provo I missed all sorts of stuff that I wished I had been there for! We had so much fun together, me and my wardies, that I never wanted to leave.
7. Oh my goodness, Adam Lambert. I already loved him from American Idol the year before, but I didn't fully recognize his oddities and talents until For Your Entertainment settled into its home in my iTunes on March 3, 2010. That. man. can. sing. It still shocks me.
8. Lee DeWyze. My love for the guy has come full circle this year. It began in March when I finally started paying serious attention to this last season of American Idol. Lee's version of "The Boxer" stole my heart, and then I found "Beast of Burden" (which is now one of the top played songs in my iTunes). I bought all of his American Idol songs, and then this Thanksgiving, I bought his new album, as I'm sure you are all aware.
9. Say Anything. It's a teenager drama, made in 1989. Starring John Cusack. Love that guy. This movie is cheesy and ridiculous, but also quite beautiful. I mean, there are certain moments and elements that just kill me. It's the classic boy gets girl, boy loses girl, boy gets girl again movie, but it's powerful. I watched it twice in a row and then my favorite parts probably 10 times. And then I just bought the movie on Amazon for $3.
10. Holy cow, 30 Rock and Community. Thanks a lot, Paul, for getting me hooked on these shows that have consumed way too much of my time. I'm not a TV watcher, and it took that boy like 2 full years to convince me to watch these 2 shows. But heck, a lot of laughter has come of that fateful decision.
11. THE HUNGER GAMES. Can these books seriously be real? The Hunger Games and Catching Fire (not Mockingjay so much) are some of my favorite books ever. I like need to investigate them for inherent magical power or something, because they are dangerously ADDICTING. Books like that are way too fun to read. I can't even handle it. Finding books like The Hunger Games and reading them is a breathtaking experience, really. I read The Hunger Games on New Years Day. Yes. I spent the entire first say of 2010 absorbing that book, obsessively. I finished that night and thought I would probably die if I didn't start the second one immediately. And then I dreamed about it. For days. It was so all-consuming and stressful and amazing. I actually started a secret book blog because of my need to talk about this book. To rave about it for no one to hear.
12. The Ocean. Yep, this year I fell in love with something so obvious and amazing as the ocean. We went to San Diego in August, and I fell in love. I just stared at it and swam in it and became all poetic and tried to find words to describe the awe I felt. I wrote about it in my journal for like a week. I couldn't describe what I wanted to. But I kind of crave the ocean now.
13. I had a distinct realization, this year, of my love for novels that are character driven. Like some modern stuff-- F. Scott Fitzgerald and some Hemingway. Some specific examples of this year, actually, are "A Separate Peace" and "The Chocolate War." I am fascinated by reading about people. I love to see how they react to things and what motivates them. I want to know what they care about and why. And sometimes I get bored with a novel if that doesn't happen. I am a stickler for character development, unless the novel is so fast paced that I don't have time to care (exhibit A: The Hunger Games). Both of the novels I mentioned above are young adult novels that I had to read for my adolescent literature class. And I loved them both. Probably too much. Strangely enough, both books are about all boys' schools. And some of the boys are nice, and some are evil. And the reader has to figure out if the evil is justified and if the evil characters are pitiable. Anyway, it's interesting. And this year, I love character-driven novels.
14. The year has closed off, music-wise, with the new Michael album. Track 6, "Best of Joy," is worth the whole album. I do have to say that when I first bought the album and listened to the whole thing, I was very worried that some of the songs actually may not be Michael (you probably remember the controversy. I wrote about it like a month ago). I got sick to my stomach while listening to it and did some more research on the issue. I played clips of songs that I was positive were Michael for some friends, and then played the ones I was unsure about. They agreed that he sounded different. However, I have now decided that the songs are all authentic and real. If not the Michael Jackson Estate, who can I trust to be the authority on the man? No one. So I submit.
15. Shopping in general. I loved it before, but the term "shopping" has taken on a whole new meaning. I love online shopping. Why would I go to a store without knowing exactly what I want, when I can figure that out online first? Why? I love shopping in Park City. I love those outlets and buying nice nice clothes for super cheap. I love shopping with Lene and Sarie. They are really good at buying stuff and then convincing me to buy stuff. I just like to wear new clothes, okay?
16. Provo in the summer time. Best friends of ever, perfect sunshine, the moon pool, fireworks, San Diego, paradise.

Of course, I loved other things, like BYU basketball and football, but that is not new and unique to 2010.

Times Square on New Years' Eve EXPOSED

2011-01-04T15:00:00.000-08:00

Audrey Spainhower tells all in this, the UNTOLD STORY of a great American tradition: the horror, the misery, and the less than 5 seconds of excitement.

Stephanie and I rode a bus from DC to NYC on New Years' Eve. It left at 8:15am. We got to NY around noon and quickly made our way to the Brooklyn Bridge. That was our one chosen touristy thing for the day. After thinking really hard for about fifteen minutes, we figured out the subway system and mapped out our way to the bridge. We finally made it to Brooklyn but then failed to find the pizza place we had been aiming for. So we ate pizza somewhere else, but still Brooklyn thin-crust and lotsa cheese style.

Stephanie, walking across the bridge

By the time we made it back into the City it was almost 4:00pm-- we came out of the subway at 42nd St, right smack in the prime of Times Square. To give you a visual, if you've never been there before, it looks a little bit like the strip in Vegas and a lot like a cartoon. The marquises and posters are larger-than-life and brightly colored.

We were told by a policewoman that the ball was going to drop pretty much right above where we were standing. We were like, "sweet! Let's just stay standing right here!" But then we figured out that the area where we were standing was going to be closed off for emergency people and camera crews when it got a little later. We were instructed to go down the street and pick a different entrance onto 5th Ave. So we walked down to 45th. They wouldn't let us in. They said the block was full of people already. We tried 47th (amid thousands of other people, mind you). Same Story. We tried 49th, now 7 blocks away from the ball. They still wouldn't let us in. We finally joined a cue to get through the barricade at 52nd street (a mere 10 blocks from the ball), and were smashed to oblivion by the hordes of anxious people for about an hour before they finally let us through (and we were some of the last people allowed onto that block). We rushed through security (they searched everyone's person and bags. That's why it took so long) and found ourselves caged into the block between 51st and 52nd in another metal barricade. It felt like we had been corralled. There was a different oval-shaped barricade set up on every block, and hundreds of people were trapped in every one of them. And there was no leaving the barricades, not even if you were going to pee your pants (actually, I saw them let one girl go. And she had to walk down 7 NY blocks by herself before she was let in to a bathroom), because:

1. First, there was no room to move. Too many people smashed together. So it was hard to get out of the barricade even if the policemen would have allowed it.
2. The policemen were watching, and if you left, you could not come back.

Once we were settled into the barricade it was a little after 5:00pm, and the long wait began. We looked ahead to 7 hours of standing in the corral. So we thought of numerous ways to pass the time:

1. Make friends with the people around you who share in your 7-hour wait misery. We met some girls next to us who were from Georgia and were just adorable. They helped Steph and I be excited because they were excited. We also made friends with a guy who was by himself. He had been separated from his friend earlier (in the crowds) and they couldn't find each other again until they were both corralled into separate blocks. So, he just stuck with us through it all and we talked to him for just about the entire 7 hours. He was an unusual character to say the least. Well, really, the most unusual thing about him was that he refused to tell anyone his name. He didn't make an issue about it, he just smoothly changed the subject anytime anyone asked him for it. And he was asked several times. When I first asked him, I thought he said his name was Eldar, but when I was like, "what?," he changed the subject. So Stephanie and I refer to him as Eldar, Oldar, Elgar, Oldvar, and any other variation of that. To paint a picture of this man, he was almost my exact same age, 6'6", moderately built, from Connecticutt (which he claimed is populated only by "old, rich people who own a lot of land"), is a student at UCONN, wants to be a neurobiologist, went on vacation to Florida once for 4 days and spend $3,000 ("but it's not about the money, it's about having fun."), travels to Europe quite frequently, and has a nice car ("I have to borrow someone else's car when I come to NY. I would NEVER drive my car to my cousin's house in Manhattan."). Notice that the inserted quotes are from Elgar. Last, there was a group of people directly in front of us that we talked about a lot, but we didn't talk TO them. They were from Colorado (fellow westerners), and there were about 5 girls and one man. The girls all wore matching giant T-shirts over their coats that said "CO" on them, and winter hats with animal ears on them. They also wore variations of glasses with flashing lights. The man was obviously dating one of the girls (they practically made-out every hour and Oldar complained about the PDA constantly), but he looked to be about twice her age, and we were all very disturbed. To add to the absurdity, the man pulled out a FLASK from his coat after midnight, drank some, and then passed it to his sweetheart who looked barely over-age. AHEM, Mr., public drinking is illegal in this city. Anyway.

2. We marched in place to keep warm, to stretch our atrophied muscles, and to take up time.

me, sitting down, giving my legs and feet some relief.

3. We sat on the ground a couple of times, for short stints only-- it didn't take long for the asphalt to freeze our butts.

4. We played dumb games with Eldar. Like movie quote or character games. None of them worked very well or for very long because we hadn't seen the same movies. He's a non-Mormon boy and likes the movies that one would predict he does. Those movies do not even fall into my vocabulary.

5. We listened to my iPod. Out loud. We only got through a couple of songs, though, before I realized that having a full iPod battery on the way back to DC that night was muy importante.

6. About every hour someone would say, "well, I guess we could take another picture." So that took up about a total of 30 seconds.

And that's about it. That's as far as the creativity goes. It was really long and cold and boring and miserable. And have you ever tried standing in the same place for 7 hours? I can't even describe the pain in my legs and feet. The bottom of my feet are BRUISED. First from walking all day and then from standing on the damage.

Reference point: you see the shadow of someone's head in the middle of screen? above that head is a pillar of lights. Above that pillar is a teeny little orb of light. That's the ball.

And to top it all off, we were literally 10 blocks from the dumb New Years' Eve ball. And about 7 from the stage where all sorts of people performed that I would have loved to see, namely, Ke$ha, Taio Cruz, and the Backstreet Boys. Yes, my BSB were right down the street and I couldn't so much as hear a teensy note from a song. The ball look to be about the size of a pinhead in front of us, and we could see a tiny little screen below it with things moving around on it, but that's about it.

A really, really, really zoomed in shot.

But I was there. I stood in Times Square on New Years' Eve 2010, and that's something. I've come to a level of acceptance where I'm glad that we went, but only just barely. I still kind of wish we had just stayed in DC and rang in the new year by ourselves, standing on my balcony. But alas, the deed is done.

Anyway, as midnight drew near, there was still only a slight feeling of excitement in the air. Everyone around us just wanted midnight to pass so that we could go home. The countdown started and I held up my camera to film it. I watched the ball drop through my camera, totally missing the real thing. By the time I had realized what I was doing I was too late. The ball the gone, it was 2011, and the fireworks started.

Taken right after midnight.

Stephanie and I found our way out of the barricade and down the street-- we had to walk a total of 18 blocks to our bus. And that's when we started seeing the drunk people, slowly emerging from bars, not to mention the literally ONE MILLION people rushing out of Times Square. One guy threw up directly in front of us. We just held our breath and moved past really fast.

While we were walking to the bus, Stephanie commented, "I wouldn't recommend this to anyone. Not even the people I don't like." I agreed.

We found our way back to the bus and boarded at around 1:30am. We sat in our seats and fell promptly asleep. The bus left at 2am, and I was able to sleep until about 4am. Then I just started getting miserable. My throat hurt and I was exhausted but fidgety. But I survived, and the bus finally pulled into Dupont Circle in Washington at 6:40am. We got back to my apartment in Arlington at 8:00am and immediately got in bed.

And that is the end of our trip to Times Square for New Years' Eve.

I reiterate Stephanie's comment, I would not recommend the experience to anyone. But I add some qualifiers. If you can book a hotel close to Times Square and don't have to ride the bus home after, your experience will improve dramatically. If you are able to arrive in Times Square at like 9am day of and can wait outside all day and don't mind the standing, you will love the night time hours before midnight because you will be in a spot to see the show, hear the music and announcers, and get all the free hats and noisemakers. On those conditions, I recommend the experience. Or if you like doing things that make you hate being alive, then go right ahead and follow my lead.

But even still, I'm grateful for the opportunity. It really is cool. And not too many people I know can say that they have been in Times Square for New Years' Eve. I mean, it's worth something. I glad I was able to do it... I just won't ever do it again.

:) note: please don't interpret this dramatic representation of the experience as more than it is. I like to sound ridiculous and to make things either seem more awful or way cooler than they actually are. In this case, it actually was really awful, but it was still a cool/good experience!

I'm here I'm here I'm here!

2010-12-30T20:06:00.000-08:00

I have lots to say. And like zero time.

First of all, I don't have internet in my apartment yet. So I'm in the little internet zone in the lobby of my apartments.

Speaking of apartments, I'm stoked about this one.

I have a 12th floor balcony that looks out at the city of Arlington, VA.
I have a doorman who helps people carry up their things.
I have a business center where printing is FREE.
I have a gym on the top floor with big big windows.
I live about a block from the metro and a giant super fun mall.
All the bedrooms have giant walk-in closets and huge mirrors in the bathrooms.

I'm still the only person here-- there will eventually be eleven of us. I think someone else is coming tomorrow. We will have two apartments between us, and I think I'm going to be in the one that I'm not in right now. The second one isn't available until next week. So, the 12th floor thing might change, unfortunately. But I'll still have a balcony. And maybe an even bigger apartment! (because it's the 3-bedroom rather than the 2!)

Last night and today I roamed around the district and fondly remembered my old stomping grounds. I have already covered Foggy Bottom, Georgetown, Capitol Hill, Penn Quarter, and a lot of Crystal City. The Mall is next on the list (it would have been first, but I have to follow Stephanie's plans because she is only here for a couple of days. She flew out with me, btw). I love it too much. I'm so happy to be here!

ALSO, tomorrow I am going to NYC for NYE. Yay Times Square. Look for updates on THAT!

Rain, rain, it finally went away.

2010-12-23T16:44:00.000-08:00

Until today, it rained in like the whole state of Utah EVERYDAY. And gosh, I hate rain. I don't know how I'm going to survive Washington, DC. Eek.

1. I feel like the weather, though, reflected my own inner turmoil as I finished my finals and packed up to leave Provo for the foreseeable future. I don't have specific plans to go back... which means that I no longer live in Provo and am done with BYU. It's a depressing thought, really. I have loved my time there more than I can possibly say, and it just breaks my heart to imagine never going back to that life. But I have come to terms with it. I'm excited to see what happens next-- I know that I will love the next stage of my life just as much as I loved my years at Brigham Young University. (look ahead to a post about BYU and why I love it so much. It may not come until April, though, when I actually graduate). I packed and cleaned, said good bye to A LOT of people that I love, and admittedly cried about the whole ordeal kind of a lot. It was hard. I didn't want to leave.

2. Meghan Newby and Lorina Binning are back from their missions!!! I had the privilege and honor to visit Meghan in the Salt Lake airport during her layover there last Thursday. And I cried like a baby when I saw her. It was embarrassing. I tried to explain that I was just emotional because of all the crazy things of that week, but really it was just good to see her. I was happy to have been able to see her because she'll be back at BYU, but I'll be in DC and won't see her or Lorina at all. The airport was my one chance. But I'm excited to be able to talk to them and catch them up on everything.

2. Anyway, it rained on Saturday. Rachelle's wedding day. And despite the poor weather, the day was beautiful. The temple was lovely (even though everyone's hair was all messed up in pictures), the luncheon was perfect, and the reception was charming. The wedding, like the packing and moving in the days before it, was an emotional, draining experience (as was reflected in the rain). I have had many best friends get married. This was actually my 5th time as a bridesmaid. But I do have to say that it was one of my most meaningful experiences as a bridesmaid. Rachelle and I have been through a lot together. We've been friends for a long time. It was painful to lose her. I have to admit that I panicked a couple of times in the process of her courtship and engagement to Brad and some tears were shed. But I am so happy for her, and I can't wait to see where life takes her. I just hope against all hope that we can maintain some of the closeness that I love about our friendship. I just love that girl.

3. On Sunday morning my family drove up to Ogden for some family stuff. It rained the whole way. The whole way for real. That night we had our family Christmas party, and I was struck by the fact that my family is extremely understanding and accepting of everyone. My extended family (on my dad's side) is a hodge podge of people, many half-related or not even officially married-into our family. It can get very confusing. But everyone is loved and welcome. I'm so grateful for that. We all love each other. And our once-a-year get-together is very well attended. Everyone comes. And it still surprises me when a cousin who is never heard from except on the day of that party every year, shows up with new children and/or a new significant other. And everyone is welcome. I love it.

4. On Tuesday night my family went to the basketball game between BYU and Weber @ Weber. We are a Weber family. My parents went there. My grandpa has worked there for like 60 years. He is actually in the Weber State Athletic Hall of Fame because he announced all the athletic events for like 30 years. He was "The Voice of the Wildcats." And while we were at the game and I had dozens of aunts, uncles, cousins (and even siblings and parents) rooting for Weber, I held true to my own school. (The Beach Boys song, "Be True to Your School" comes to mind). I yelled for my Cougars. It was the last time I'll see our BYU boys play (live) this season, because of my silly decision to move out of state. I really am upset about this. And if I hadn't been so excited about the game and our win, I maybe would have shed a tear out of pure nostalgia for the game of basketball and the joy that our boy Jimmer has brought me. :)

this'll be me again soon.

And today, the rain is gone. The sun came out, and the mourning I have felt for my past life is over. I am cleansed and ready to move on, seriously. I am extremely anxious for Washington. Cause, you know, it doesn't even feel like it's an exciting thing that is about to happen. Or like I'm doing anything unusual. It just feels normal. So meant to be. Like, of course I would do my student teaching in Washington. Living in DC feels normal. And good. And I'm anxious to fly out there and begin it all. To re-live the fairy tale, but in a different way.

Once again, it's finals week

2010-12-14T13:52:00.000-08:00

...and all I can think about are things to write on my blog.

1. Costco paper towel manufacturers are cheaters. My roommates and I collectively purchased a giant package of paper towels. We have gone through several rolls incredibly fast. I realized today why that is. The individual paper towels are GINORMOUS. They are much larger than is necessary. But, those people at Kirkland are making a ton of money off of their giant paper towels. Larger paper towels= less on a roll= more rolls used per household because one roll runs out really fast.

2. I went to The Nutcracker last Saturday with two of my sisters- Stephanie and Elise. We went to dinner beforehand and we were all dressed up and kind of matchy-matchy. It was adorable. And I loved the Nutcracker. The Snow Queen and the Sugar Plum Fairy were my favorites because they have very very sparkly tutus and they are just so beautiful. They looked delicate and perfect and I wanted to be them.

Anyway, while we were there, I remembered something funny. I went to The Nutcracker once before when I was 9 or 10. I remember that earlier in the day, before going to the ballet, I somehow acquired a new box of crayons. These were not any crayons, though. They were glow-in-the-dark. And I was obsessed with them. What is a 9-year-old girl who loves crayons and colors more than life itself to do when she has evening plans and a new box of crayons? Bring them with her. And watch them glow in the dark theater throughout the whole ballet. Yes, that is what I did. And actually, the glow died out during the first half, so during intermission I ran into the bathroom and held my crayons up to the light to re-charge them.

Brilliant.

3. Rachelle's bridal shower. It really was a blast. Just about everyone who was invited was able to come. And we ate pizza and delicious cupcakes that Kaitlin made from scratch.

I realized while throwing this shower that the point of the whole thing is to socialize and chat and give the bride good presents, but really it is for the bride to feel loved and appreciated by her best friends. So I hope that's what we accomplished. Rachelle, we threw that shower for you because we love you and we want you to know how much we appreciate you.

4. I met a boy at a party the other night who said he wanted to be a history teacher so he can coach football. We make jokes about those kinds of people all the time in my program. We despise those kinds of people. The boy actually said this, "yeah, I figure I should do history instead of one of the real, hard subjects like biology. History just isn't as important, so I figured that would be a good idea." And I actually said, "wow. Watch who you're talking to when you decide to bash history." Seriously, kid. Not cool. Not cool at all. And if you ever read this post, please do every child, every history teacher, and the beloved subject of history itself, a favor, and please please please do not become a history teacher. I'm way to passionate about history and the way it is taught to allow someone who could care less about the subject but just wants to coach football to let this happen. Anyway, it made me really mad. How can someone be so stupid?

5. Dani got engaged. Yes, ma'am. She is to be wed. To Michael James Everton. In March maybe? read the whole story on her blog.

6. BYU basketball now 10-0, AND we're ranked #16 on the AP poll. If we keep moving up in the rankings, imagine the possibilities!!!! We could get a good seed in the NCAA tournament, play crappy teams in the first couple rounds and actually go pretty far in the tournament. Wouldn't that be just so so so exciting!!?!?!?

7. About an hour ago I was in the Terrace of the Wilk eating my last hot bread and honey butter as a student at BYU. I sat across the table from two boys deeply engrossed in conversation that I couldn't help but listen to every word of. Eavesdropping. A favorite Terrace pastime.

Anyway, these boys appeared to be discussing some sort of court case they were planning. I assumed that it was for a moot court final in some class. Which is cool. They used very expert terminology and really sounded like they knew what they were talking about. One boy was smiling and looked very happy about something, and the other (who was dishing out most of the information) looked very smug. They were both wearing Newsie hats, and the smug one was markedly more attractive than the other (who was on the unkempt, in-need-of-a-shower, and chubby side)

After a while of listening to their banter I noticed some unusual terms. To quote: "Alario," "the six gates," and "overhill." Suspicious. I became even more suspicious when this conversation took place:

(Happy, chubby one) "What if I told you that I informed my superior of all this?"
(Smug, attractive one) "By superior, you mean your father?" (tone was incredulous)
(Happy, chubby one) "Yes my father. The king."
(Smug, attractive one) "You mean the king knows the location of the gate? I can't subpoena the king!"
Conversation followed by intense laughter from both parties regarding the idea of forcing the king to the stand in trial.

They also discussed the possibility of putting one "Ryden" on the stand.
Smug, attractive one exclaimed in surprising animation, "but he doesn't know the location of the 6 gates!" The other then countered, "What if I told you that Alario wrote a letter to Ryden about the gates, and I have the letter." (Smug one answered) "Hmmm. Even so, we would have to prove that Johnathan has a good reason to keep Alario alive. Alario is in Johnathan's custody."

Alario appears to be the man on trial. For murder I think. Or maybe he killed someone to cover up the crime that he committed regarding the 6 gates. I couldn't make sense of it all. Either way, Alario is an evil villain, and the sentence prescribed by smug boy was to put him on the front lines of some battle that was supposed to happen so that he was forced to fight.

Before getting up I asked them what in the world they were talking about. I couldn't resist. I was hoping they would say dungeons and dragons. They said it was a role-playing game. They were vague. And then one of them started to explain what an RPG is. I quickly said that I was familiar with the term. I told them they were nerdy but funny to listen to (in a nice way). They laughed and resumed their deep and important discussion while I walked away, smiling to myself and carrying a handful of notes that I had taken on their conversation.

Adios.

Audrey's early politics

2010-12-11T13:24:00.000-08:00

At the gym (about 10 minutes ago), I was watching CNN while listening to my Motown #1's. On CNN there was a breaking report about how Bill Clinton supports Obama's new tax something or other. And I remembered something.

When I was in 3rd grade during the 1996 presidential election and Clinton was campaigning for re-election. My elementary school was full of excitement-- all the classes took a poll and we kind of ran our own election. There was a giant graph in the hall that showed the polls and everything. Elementary kids in Utah were largely in favor of Bob Dole, token republican of the campaign.

I, however, was 100% behind Bill Clinton because for some odd reason, I thought that President Clinton had been in charge of the opening ceremonies at the 1996 Olympic Games in Atlanta, and I was obsessed with those Olympics and their opening ceremonies.

Seriously. My political views of age 8 were directly correlated to the grand show I had seen on my little television set several months earlier.

I remember that very specifically. And all the other 3rd graders thought I was crazy for liking President Clinton.

The end.

Still

2010-12-09T16:33:00.000-08:00

I still love Lee and have not stopped listening to Live It Up since Thanksgiving. It's happy music.

Happy Pearl Harbor Day.

2010-12-07T23:18:00.000-08:00

I celebrate this memorial day in two ways: 1) I generally wear a patriotic pin on Pearl Harbor Day, but I couldn't find mine this year. 2) I watch the movie. Compelling history+Ben Afflek+Josh Hartnett+a confusing love triangle=a very good idea.

But mostly I just like to remember. I like to remember how it affected our nation. Today in my history teaching methods class a group presented their project and did a little bit on Pearl Harbor and September 11th. The parallels they drew between the two were fascinating. I swear, I got the chills probably 4 times during their lesson. It was powerful. And I was so glad to remember both Pearl Harbor and September 11th. They were important times for our country, and I think that many people often forget that.

Also, today I did some research on the more militant side of the Civil Rights movement for the unit plan I'm working on It was fascinating and I can't stop thinking about it. Probably my favorite character of the movement was Stokely Carmichael, a college student and head of the Student Non-Vionlent Coordinating Committee (SNCC) for a couple years in the mid-1960's. He's just an interesting character. His involvement in the 1960s Civil Rights movement began with adherence to innovative non-violent forms of protest. Eventually, though, as he began to see the violence and pain that he and his followers were subjected to, he began to be more militant. He actually coined the term "black power" as it applies to the Black Power portion of the movement. He stepped down as head of SNCC (well, they kind of kicked him out because he was too much of a celebrity) in 1967, and joined the Black Panthers. In April of 1968 he played a significant role in the DC Riots following Martin Luther King's assassination.

Anyway, I think he was interesting. And a little crazy. :)
And I have, for your viewing pleasure, a clip of the speech (I think) in which he first used the term, "black power." It's incredible. He was such a good speaker.

Some other things of today:

1. New Michael Jackson song available on Ping (a new music social networking thing on iTunes). It's a collaboration with Lenny Kravitz, and I really like it. It was recording during the Invincible sessions, and ya'll know how much I love what came of that.
2. I realized that I wear some sort of blue most days of the weak. I have a lot of blue clothes. Especially navy blue. I like to wear navy blue and white.
3. I decided that no matter what, pea coats are actually not comfortable at all. I will always be more comfortable in a sweatshirt or puffy down coat. Seriously. I like pea coats and I think they are adorable, but they are not cozy and comfortable. I can't stand wearing one with a backpack. Can't stand it. At all. Lame, right? Why do I have to dislike scarves (they choke me), boots, and cute coats? It seems as though all the things that girls like about winter I don't like.
4. I leave Provo a week from tomorrow. Such limited time it's freaking me out. But I'm getting really excited too.
5. Rachelle is getting married in 10 days.
6. I don't get enough sleep. Ever.
7. I went to the American Crafts warehouse sale this morning with Elise and Audrey P.
8. Now that I'm done with my last research paper of the forsee-able future, I'm kind of sad. For real.

The end.

#18

2010-12-06T13:54:00.000-08:00

The polls for week 5 have been released and WHA-BAM!!!

BYU is #18 on the AP Poll and #21on the Coaches Poll.

Check it out here.

Woes of the 490 paper that I should have worked harder on.

2010-12-06T11:23:00.000-08:00

So it's finally due today. Today is the day. THE day.

I've been waiting for this day since my first semester at BYU when I was being murdered by my History 200 paper and learned that I would have to repeat the experience x10 when I took History 490-- the last history class I would be required to take before graduation. I filled with dread and actually changed my major for a semester to avoid this one class.... the dreaded 490.

Well, I've written a lot of papers since HIST 200 and am no longer scared of writing more than 20 pages in a paper. I've done it multiple times and really, I don't care that much about if my teacher thinks my paper is awesome and worthy of publishing or not. Just don't care. I've stopped associating my success in school with my value as a person and the strength of my character (my habits are much healthier these days).

So I've done minimal work. At this point my paper stands 20 pages with 4 additional pages of bibliography, a total of 63 citations (ridic, I know), one map, and a killer (fine, it's boring) title page. But I think I've produced a pretty good paper. I mean, really, I am excellent at organization, topic sentences, tying in quotes, and analyzing primary sources. My weaknesses lie in being too wordy or making up words. I also like to have really, really long paragraphs. I'm quite long winded if you already couldn't tell just by reading my blog. Also, my conclusion is super cheesy and my introduction is NOT attention grabbing. But it does the job. My historiography is a solid 5 pages but is really just what I gleaned from scanning through my sources, it's hardly an in depth analysis. I know that my first argument is weak. I lack the primary sources. I know that section 2 of my third argument is weak. It actually doesn't tie very well to my thesis. But that's a secret. None of my editors noticed- not even my professor- so I'm hoping it'll slide in the final draft.

My paper is lacking. But I'm turning it in anyway (because it's due in less than 2 hours). I think it's good enough.

But I want to talk about the drama of today a little bit. First, I was up until 3 working on all sorts of homework for my marriage and family class (despite the interesting discussions I ultimately regret taking that class. It's going to shoot down my GPA for the semester simply because I didn't care.) I got up at 8 and came to campus and have been working on my paper ever since (besides an hour at work in Special Collections). Unfortunately for me, I forgot my computer power cord. I had heard somewhere that it was possible to check them out at the library. So, close to noon, when my computer was about to die, I ran up from the first floor (where the serious studiers are) to the third to ask the information desk where I could find a power cord. They directed me to the LRC, on the 4th floor. I ran up those stairs, got the power cord, and then went to the 2nd floor to Dani's locker to get all my books about the Mormon Battalion for my research. I couldn't remember the locker combination. So then I went back to the first floor where I had left my stuff, looked up the combo, plugged in my computer, then went back up to the 2nd floor, went to the bathroom, got into the locker, pulled out my stack of 11 books, and then proceeded back down to the 1st floor where I am now writing this blog post while I should be cleaning up my paper some more so that I can turn it in in less than 2 hours.

I am just ridiculous. And I know I'm being dramatic about this.

But the point is, I'm turning in my paper today. And I could not be happier about completing this enormous hurdle in the process of my education.

edit: It's 1:36pm and I'm about to print of the dumb thing and turn it in. I thought I should save some photos, you know, just to keep the memories of this semester-long saga.

A screen shot of the final product in print preview:

I had to pull out all the post-it notes that I used to mark important things in all my 11 books about the Mormon Batallion. I'm not kidding, probably 200 post-it notes. And those things were my lifeline. They labeled everything. It was surprisingly painful to take the post-it notes out. I had mini heart attacks with each one- small pangs of panic-- it felt like I needed to leave them in there, cause what if I needed to know where something was again??!! To comfort me in this process I listened to Freddie sing, "We Are The Champions" and I felt like a champion.

And that's all.

The End.

Everything I ever need to know...

2010-11-21T13:04:00.000-08:00

....I learned from Jennifer Josephine Wandalla Bowler McDonald.

She has a long name, but Moe and I like to call her Jo, Jenn, Jen (I always seem to leave off the second "n," which she definitely prefers), and Jenny (she actually doesn't like being called that too much. But I insist).

1. Jenny taught me about manual cars. Did you know that if you push a manual car (that won't start) down a hill, it will start? Yeah, I know, it's kind of a miracle. We had to do that once to get home from our friend Heather's house. We just pushed that car right down that hill, it finally started, and we all jumped in the car for the ride home. I can't believe we made it. Jenny used to have a little cream-colored car named Sir Walter Raleigh. We were sophomores when she had that car. She got it from her older brother, Ben, who had purchased it for literally ONE DOLLAR from a co-worker at Frostop. And that car liked to die at stoplights sometimes. We would stroke the dash and say nice words, and Sir Walter would lovingly spark back to life and get us safely home. We gave that car a dignified name so that he knew we respected him.

2. She taught me about Frostop and how a life is never complete without it. Jenny used to work there. And when she was working, Moe and I would go visit. And I would order a mint oreo shake with cookie dough sprinkles on top because I could never completely decide between oreos and cookie dough chunks. Jen was the sweet employee who liked to do special favors for me. Jenny also introduced me to the too-amazing-for-words picadilly chip. Those things have more grease than that philly cheese steak I ate in Philadelphia that got all over my clothes. But boy are they delicious.

3. Jenny taught me how to be wrong. During the first months of our best-friendship, we were often at odds with one another. I definitely thought I was a smart cookie and I didn't like to back down or be wrong or do anything that showed weakness. Eventually, after several awkward car rides home from school (that Jenny so generously offered me), I learned that it's okay for little things not to matter. I learned that every little thing didn't have to be a big deal, and that my friendship with Jenny was worth way more than being right about something. And, I learned that I acutally was wrong a lot of the time. Jenny and her wisdom was actually very powerful- quite a formidable force.

4. Jenny taught me about The Carpenters. 9 times out of 10, the Carpenters were playing from the tape deck in Sir Walter Raleigh. But I don't remember listening to any songs on the tape except for "Close To You." I daresay that song is the theme song of our sophomore year. And still, when I hear it, I can feel the heat of a springtime St. George afternoon, can smell the rotting foam seats in the car, and can picture Jenny sitting there, her hand on the steering wheel, probably arguing with me about something that I haven't learned to me wrong about yet.

5. My friendship with Jenny taught me how to be a hard worker. I don't think I know anyone who is a harder worker than Jennifer Bowler McDonald. She always had a job in high school, she became a CNA after taking college classes our junior year of high school, she went to school early morning for both color guard AND jazz band, she played in the pit in all the high school musicals, she seriously worked all-night 12 hour shifts at the hospital before and after we started college, she has always had really good grades, she graduated with her RN like 2 years after high school, and now, she takes care of husband and baby and never complains. Somehow Jenny has always been able able to juggle everything and be successful in everything. She really is a hero. She has taught me that it's totally okay- and worth it- to work and sacrifice for something that you really want.

6. Jenny taught me how to make friends a priority. Throughout my 6 years since legally being able to date (wow it seems way longer than that), I have gone through many a time when a friend or roommate gets many a boyfriend, and the story is almost always the same. Said friend gets in a relationship and for the most part, forgets about you. Boyfriend because priority number one, and best friend/roommate (me) gets very crudely left behind in the dust, wimpering and lonely (I should add that I'm not complaining, I totally get it). I said "almost" because Jenny is the exception. I will never ever never ever ever forget what Jenny did for me our junior year of high school. Moe was currently dating a boy and she had forgotten us almost entirely. We had resorted to scheduling disciplinary friend hearings with her just to have a conversation (we really did that. We left the court order notice on her car. We got annoyed, okay? But she's all forgiven now. Loved her always). So then, Jenny started dating a boy at school too. I got really scared because then it would just be me, awkward, chubby, and alone all the time with no friends. But Jenny understood my pain. She very fairly and kindly divided her time between me, the best friend, and him, the boyfriend. She hung out with me despite her likely (though never confirmed) preference to be with the boy toy because she knew that I needed her. She made me a priority, and I felt that. It was so.... nice. So good. I knew that I was important to her and that she knew that I would be permanent, while said boy may not be. Because Jen and I will always be friends. Best friends.

7. Jenny introduced me to Lord of the Rings. Moe helped too. But we watched them all at her house, and she loaned me the books to read. And her little sisters were obsessed with watching the special features on the extended version DVDs. The Bowler house, for a little while there, was overcome with Lotr mania. But I loved it. Those books and movies changed my world, all because of Jenny. And Moe too.

8. Jenny very lovingly fed my Harry Potter addiction and made it seem very much okay. She taught me to appreciate my crazy passion for things. She used to help me with my parties and such. One specific time, actually for the preparation party before book 7 came out, Jenny came to Pebbles in my Pocket in St. George, while I was working, carrying notebooks and literally all 7 Harry Potter books, and sat by the counter for several hours to write the jeopardy questions for the party. We wrote like 20 questions for each book. It was insane. But little miss devoted Jenny was with me every step of the way. And she gave up her day to sit, while I got paid, to make up questions for the party that I was throwing.

9. Jenny taught me that a person could look absolutely perfect and gorgeous without wearing any makeup. She is one of those very naturally beautiful people that you see and wonder how a person can be so beautiful. And her hair is so stinking thick and amazing!

10. Kind of a sidenote: Jenny has this amazing little library in the basement of her parent's home that was the source of most of my for-fun-reading in high school. I would sneak into that closet, pick a book, read it, and then pick another one. That is actually where I got most of the Tennis Shoes books. I never would have thought to finish that series if Jenny didn't have the books.

11. Jenny taught me how to have more fun at girls' camp that I ever thought possible, despite my already brimming obsession with it. Jenny and I, being in the same stake, were able to go to camp together as YCLs two years in a row. The first year, at Beaver High, Jenny and I managed to be the first girls to climb that horrible, wobbly, giant ladder. Teamwork, baby. It was all us. The second year, at the stake camp on Cedar Mountain, Jenny and I prepared weeks in advance for awesomeness. We sewed Batman capes. Yes, Batman capes to wear at night when we were out and about pulling pranks on people so that we could hide under them in the darkness and not get caught-- plus, we looked really cool. We also brought Batman bandaids and an entire extra tent and plastic tote bin to hold all our supplies. We set up the extra 2-man tent in the middle of the forest so that no one would find it. It was the designated "Bat Headquarters" and we used it as a secret place to plan our schemes. The extra tote was for toilet paper, shaving cream, water guns, etc., for pranks. Worked like a charm. we had a blast with out our secrets, and no one ever caught on. That same girls camp year was the year of the glowing toilet. Creepy, right? But Jenny and I had an unhealthy amount of fun together at camp. If I had to live through camp without Jenny, I would still love it, but not nearly on the same level.

12. Jenny taught me that it is totally acceptable to attend the same movie at Flood Street multiple times in one week. I'm pretty sure we did this too many times. Pirates, Cinderella Story, Sahara, Phantom of the Opera, etc. One night we convinced her little sister, Angie, to see Sahara with us. She had been like, "I think I've read that book. I don't want to see the movie." And she described the entire book/movie plot (which was the same thing) and we told her straight up that they were entirely different and that she would love the movie. We convinced her they were separate entities. Why we lied and forced her to come to the movie with us, I'll never know. But it was fun.

13. Jenny was a staunch advocate of ice cream in all forms. Frostop, Iceberg, Dairy Queen, you name it. We hit a different place every day. For real.

14. Jenn taught me how to clean her room. haha. I swear, most weekends Moe and I would get to her house to do something, and she would still have to clean her room before being allowed to go anywhere. So, we would help her. I remember that she always had random piles of tithing money everywhere, so we would have to combine all of that, fold clothes, stack up all her books, make her bed, hide the laundry in the closet, etc. I should mention, however, that a lot of the time, Moe and Jenn were waiting on ME to get there. I was the inconveniently late one, and that was especially ridiculous considering the fact that I lived about 5 blocks from Jenn, while Moe lived solid 15-20 minute drive away. Jenny's room, by the way, was the headquarters for our little game, and many hours were spent in there scheming, planning, not sleeping despite the late hour, eating pizza and caramel treasures and mint oreos, etc. Moe, Jen, and I used to sleep cross-ways on her big bed so that we all fit.

Jennifer Bowler is one of those people who knows what her priorities are. She knows who and what is important, and she makes sure that they know that. She cares and she guides and helps and rescues. And really, I wouldn't be the same person today without my Jenny. She is just really good a being a friend. She knows how to listen and she gives good answers. She really just taught me what it means to be a friend- priority, loyalty, caring, acceptance of oddities (haha), etc., and all of that by example.

Love you Jenny. Happy happy birthday, 7 days late.

WOAH.

2010-11-16T18:15:00.000-08:00

Okay, I know you're all getting sick of Jimmer madness by now, but HOLY COW!!!!

Jimmer. On the cover of Sports Illustrated. In superhero comic-book animated form.

What could possibly happen next?

Yes. March WILL be Jimmer time. Because you know what? It's Jimmer time ALL the time.

Rain is by far the most inconvenient weather there is.

2010-11-15T08:56:00.001-08:00

Jimmer

2010-11-14T22:08:00.000-08:00

Definition: verb meaning to "do something extraordinary with no apparent effort, and to look good while doing said amazing thing. " Example: "I totally jimmered the heck out of that test."

"Jimmer" can also be used as an adjective: (something happened that was totally cool) "That was so JIMMER!"

and a noun: (in reference to a boy who just walked boy smelling very nice) "he is such a jimmer."

We love Jimmer Fredette. Why? Perhaps because of his outstanding basketball skills? The fact that he was named to like 5 all-American teams this year? Maybe his nice nice shoulders and arms? Or maybe because it's just so fun to turn a classmate who you might actually see walking around campus into a celebrity?

Yesterday was the season opener. Rachel so graciously went to wait in line outside the Marriott Center around 3pm. Dani took her place at about 4:30, and I arrived at 5:00, just after they let everyone in to the building. We sat at our seats excitedly for two hours before the game started, and Jimmer made two appearances. The first time he walked in, everyone cheered, and he just raised his fist in the air.

So Dani made a shirt for the game. It said, "I LOVE JIMMER more than his girlfriend does." Before the game started, two cheerleaders made their way up the stands to us and one of them asked Dani if she could have a picture with her and the shirt. Dani was like, "wait, are you...?" And she said, "yeah, I'm his girlfriend." EEK. Embarrassing. A little. But also VERY hilarious. Haha, I about died while Dani's face turned red and she posed for the picture. As the two girls walked away, I realized: "Dani!! Jimmer is going to SEE THAT PICTURE!" Said girlfriend will be like, "hey Jimmer honey, look at this girl who is in love with you!" It might even end up on Facebook. ahahahahahaha.

The game started with a bang, they turned off the lights and dropped the sheets for the introduction. It was amazing. The first couple minutes of play were. a. mess. A little bit of a disaster. We were all over the place and there was a foul like every 10 seconds. Not an exaggeration. But then we hit a rhythm, and at one point, we were up like 39 points. The game ended 83-56.

For a more detailed report on the game, check out this article in the Washington Post. Check out the headline. Even people in Washington love Jimmer.

I love basketball season. As much, perhaps more than football season. Basketball games are just such a blast, and there are TONS of them!! It just spreads the joy over several more days of the year.

This week we have two games scheduled: Wednesday vs. Utah State, which is going to be a huge game. We lost to them last year, and the anticipation is killing me! Dani and I are even going to camp out on Tuesday night to make sure we get awesome seats (there are already like 8 tents in line. crazy byu kids). Then, on Saturday there is another game against some team I've never heard of. But don't you worry. I'll be there.

But I'm excited.

Anyway. We love Jimmer and the basketball joy he brings to BYU through his inherent awesomeness.

This guy.

2010-11-12T01:24:00.000-08:00

New boy on Glee (which is a show that I don't watch anymore) who is super adorable and has my new favorite voice (for today anyway) = Harry Potter in the Very Potter Musical on YouTube that is certifiably hilarious.

What else is new?

Michael Buble, you save my life.

2010-11-12T01:21:00.001-08:00

A new EP: "Hollywood"

I haven't had this fun much while writing a torturous paper at 2:21am, like, EVER. And it's all thanks to this song.

Over soon.

2010-11-11T23:48:00.000-08:00

Yesterday I had class at 8am. Came straight home at 9:15pm and got ready for my practicum. Drove to Lehi. Taught some 8th graders. Drove home by 4:00pm. Was at the library by 5:00pm. Worked on my senior capstone paper until midnight. Walked home in the cold darkness with my furry hood around my face, a backpack with my notebook and laptop in it, and literally 11 books in my arms.

It is days and moments like these that make me excited for when it's all over.

Breaking News

2010-11-10T18:21:00.000-08:00

So there's a new Michael Jackson single. Apparently is was recorded before he died, and record producers just cleaned it up and released it in anticipation of the release of an entire album, Michael, set to drop December 14. (YAY!!!)

Unfortunately, there is some controversy as to whether it's actually Michael's voice on the track. Which, if it's true, would be more tragic than I can say. The first time I listened to it (just moments after it became available on michaeljackson.com on Monday), I was confused. My first thought was, "this doesn't sound quite like the Michael I'm used to..." As I listened, I was convinced that it was Michael, but that the backtrack vocals were not him, probably because he didn't finish recording the harmonies. I could be wrong, but after several listens, before even hearing about the controversy, this is the conclusion that I came to. I at least noticed something was a messed up. And after several more listens, I want to add some more reasons why his voice sounds a little bit off: age and processing.

First, the last studio recording that was fully produced by Michael and his crew was released on 2004's "Michael Jackson Number Ones" greatest hits compilation album. The song was written by R. Kelly and titled, "One More Chance." He undeniably sounds a bit different in this song that in previous recordings that the general populace is very familiar with. Now, he died in 2009, dating the recording of "Breaking News" as many as 5 years after "One More Chance," the last time the world heard Michael sing on a recorded album. SO, his voice could have aged and slightly changed in the meantime (plus he passed the landmark age of 50).

Second, this MTV article about the subject mentions the fact that recording technology has changed dramatically in the last several years, and that the processed sound that it adds to natural voices can change things. In fact, to quote the article: "processing might be Jackson's voice's biggest enemy." I do quite agree- we love the natural, live Michael the best. We don't want the touch ups. BUT, the song does sound processed- and that may have been done with or without Michael's approval. He wasn't really around stop it or anything.

However, many of Michael's relatives are claiming that the voice on the track is not him. But who is to really know? Admittedly, his family and friends probably will know more than anyone. BUT, if there really are hundreds of unfinished and unpublished songs in his collection (like there was rumored to be following his death), why in the world would record executives fabricate a song and release it as original? It simply makes no sense. The same relatives who claimed the song was a fake also say that other songs on the album are 100% Michael's voice. It seems strange that Epic Records and MJJ Productions would release a fake song that they produced with some Michael sound-a-like before releasing a real one. If they were caught (kind of like they have been, if accusations are real), then they have ruined their credibility before the album is even released. That would destroy sales and really would never be a good business plan. Sheesh.

What I am getting at is that in my expert opinion (and as an avid listener and follower of Michael Jackson, I think I've earned the "expert" status), the song is real. This could all come crashing down on me, and I may eat my words soon. But whatever. I can be wrong.

In my heart of hearts, though, I really hope it's real. Really really really really I do. It was so comforting to hear the song. And to know that more is coming. I hope they don't take that away from me.

Chapter 188: The meaning of Halloween (2010)

2010-11-09T10:07:00.000-08:00

The number one best thing about Halloween: dressing up as something you're not. Or simply dressing in a costume that a normal, socially acceptable person wouldn't wear on an average day to school or work.

Halloween equals creativity and planning a special outfit. Perhaps sewing something or creating something from scratch. It means applying make up and doing hair differently than usual.

Some people equate Halloween with words like "fright" and "scary." That concept of Halloween has never been in my schema or Book of Audrey.

And as I have been known to say, "I don't believe in looking ugly on purpose." Which, I think, is a good mantra and should be applied to all people in all situations.

Boy Meets World defines Halloween as "the one holiday that brings loved ones together." And, when my concept of Halloween is considered, the BMW definition is entirely logical. Families can dress up together, go to parties, creatively carve pumpkins, bake treats for their neighbors and leave a little ghosty in the window, and trick-or-treat to get lots and lots of yummy candy that brings happiness and joy for weeks to come! Halloween is a joyous occassion of yummy treats, pretty costumes, and being with people you love.

Halloween was originally a Celtic holiday, or so Wikipedia suggests. It was the day of the year that the "veil" was the thinnest, and families could invite the spirits of their deceased relatives home for dinner, but with that they had to ward off the bad spirits. It was a celebration, but also a slightly fearful one. They used Halloween to honor and remember the dead.

Now, because of Memorial day, we no longer have the need to honor the dead on Halloween. So now it is just a fun day. And a significant one in the world of Harry Potter. (aka the day that You Know Who killed the Potters but failed to kill Harry, the day of Nearly Headless Nick's deathday party (when Harry first heard the basilisk in the wall, etc.). That is all. Not scary.

(I might add that this explanation was necessary because this year I happened to encounter several people who hate Halloween because it's "scary." They refuse to dress up and go to parties or whatever because they don't like Halloween. My argument is that a refusal to acknowledge Halloween because it is "scary" is illogical and kind of a fallacy. It doesn't have to be scary. Only fun.

This Halloween my roommates and I took the call to have fun on Halloween very seriously. It occurred in two stages:

1. Stake Halloween party on 10.29. Friday. It was also the day of a BYU basketball season preview. I missed it. For the party. We dressed up and went to dance and hang out with fun ward people. The dance was full of costumed Mormon kids who strictly followed the "no cross-dressing or masks" policy, and still obeyed the honor code dress and grooming standards. It was a wholesome, blast-and-a-half activity. I was a peacock (a really lame but cute one), Lene was Bones from the TV show, Sarie a cowboy midget (I promise it was more politically correct than it sounds), and Dani was Sally from Nightmare Before Christmas. Dani and Lene, I think I should say, actually love dressing up scary for Halloween. Dani obsesses over it a little bit. (refer to this post from last year) But I like them anyway. :)

Roommates. My makeup looks funny.

the wardies. I'm peeking out from behind Belle. Notice the very tall Hagrid in the background. He's funny.

2. SHAKE YAH MONSTER MASH PARTY at our house on 10.30. Saturday night. It rocked the socks off any other Halloween party, ever. At least I had a blast. It was probably partly because throwing a party is like gathering all of the people who you like the most at your house in one night. You get to talk to all of your favorite people (excluding the ones who live far away and couldn't come), get all dressed up, dance to fun music, and have people exclaim to you about how fun your party is. Really, ya'll should try it sometime.

To assemble the party, Dani and I first planned out the decoration, food, and scheduling details. Then, Lene, Sarie, and I had a late-night planning session at which assignments were distributed, and each party-planner was given a list of things to do.

To get the word out, we announced the party together at ward prayer and gave everyone candy. Then, we sent out Facebook invitations.

Dani wrote the Facebook description of the event (which may or may not have been my favorite thing about the whole party):

"Due to my strong personal convictions, I wish to stress that this [party] in no way endorses a belief in the occult."
-Michael Jackson

for optimal facebook taggage, come between 8:30-9:30 for the PHOTOBOOTH and the consumption of delicious foodstuffs.

at 9:30 will commence Project: Shake What Yo Mamma Gave Yah.
to paint a mental picture:
-black lights (yes, we really REALLY love these things)
-taio cruz
-glow sticks
-wicked halloween decor
-special guest appearance by justin bieber. for realz this time.

costumes: mandatory :)

see all of you party animals there!

Then, on Saturday, the day of the party, we decorated and prepared for the party, which included:
-covering our entire living room with black trash bags to make it look like a giant black, never ending cave. The corners of the blackness were covered in giant spider webs (compliments of Dallin Henrie, the best spiderweb constructor on the planet)
-Adhering a 12-foot long piece of white butcher paper to the wall in the kitchen for signing with highlighters during the black-light portion of the evening (this was my other favorite part about the whole thing)
-Setting up the photobooth, complete with gray backdrop covered in a giant black spider web, nice camera (thanks Rachelle!!) on tri-pod, and spotlights for good lighting.
-Making the food: brownies, apple cider in giant cauldron with dry ice, bloody (white chocolate died red) popcorn, slimy (green jello) popcorn, edible teeth (apple slices with small marshmallows held between them with peanut butter) and loads of tootsie rolls. (Thanks to the ovens in both Banbridge 5 and 9).
-Borrowing and assembling speakers with the help of Jonathan Meacham (who reads my blog) and Brett Gladsen, ex-wardies but still friends extraordinaire.
-Removing ALL of the living room furniture and hiding it in the corners of our apartment, the one across the hall, and in the stairwells (this might have been the trickiest part of the whole thing) (Dani's Michael aided in the removal and BB9 very kindly allowed us to hide our couch in their apartment)
-Assembling a playlist (thanks Dani) complete with requested Jackson 5 songs.

-Setting up our entertainment center and TV outside of the door to play the "Thriller" music video on a loop throughout the whole party (my other favorite thing). (Made possible by the contribution of Lynne's extension cord).
-Preparing for the blacklights. We had to remove the tube lights from the hallway (which we aren't technically allowed to mess with), switch out the kitchen lights, borrow standing lamps from BB9, and switch all the light bulbs.
-getting ourselves costumed and ready. Stephanie had to come do my makeup at 5:00pm, in between getting herself and other friends ready.

And then the party started at 8:30, and TONS of people came. I always get really nervous about throwing parties. I mean, you really go out on a limb. You prepare all of this stuff, but then what if it's lame and no one comes? You put yourself in a vulnerable position when you plan things, but really, the stress is worth the reward.

Some of my favorite photos from the evening: (you can pick out the photobooth ones)

Ryan. Joey. Steve. Me. Lynne. My favorite part is that Joey is Peter Pan.

Dani and Michael looking purposefully awkward but so so so adorable as Jack and Sally

Washington Seminar alumni.

Rachelle and Brad looking hot as Mr. and Mrs. Smith


love love love this one.

ELISE!

you can get an idea of the crowd. and the black walls.

The Jackson 5 minus 1. Love these boys.

For more photobooth pictures, see THIS blog.

And I'm so thankful for all the random (but not so random) help we got. So many people contributed little things. It just made me realize how much I care about my Provo friends, and how much they care about me and my roommates. And when people came to the party who I invited but didn't really expect, I was so surprised and so happy! It makes you feel so good when people accept your invitation. I just really appreciated all the people who took the time to come to our party and make all the work worth it.

You see? Halloween really does bring loved ones together.

2010-11-08T08:23:00.001-08:00

Announcements, announcements, ANNOUUUNNNCEEEMEENTS!

2010-11-04T16:39:00.000-07:00

I, Audrey Spainhower, will be doing my student teaching in Washington, D.C., our nation's capital, next semester. I'm not sure what school, subject, or grade, but it's officially happening.

After the aforementioned student teaching, I will fly back to Utah to walk in the commencement services at Brigham Young University, where they will hand me my diploma. It will be an end to happiness and joy and a beginning to the absolutely unknown.

I love both the Backstreet Boys and Michael Jackson. Lucky for me, there are exciting things for both of these artists (despite the non-living condition of one party) on the horizon.

First, the BSB are launching a tour in 2011 with New Kids on the Block. Yes, you read that right. I just watched the official announcement on Oprah.

Second, By the end of this year I will own the new "Michael Jackson Vision" DVDs that contain ALL music videos and short films, some of which are very rare. AND, I will also own A NEW MICHAEL JACKSON ALBUM, titled, Michael. It is a compilation of songs recorded before his death that were never made into an album. It officially goes on sale on December 14. That is 40 days away. I almost shed a tear when michaeljackson.com sent me the news a mere 10 minutes ago.


the new album cover. It reminds me of Dangerous.

Last, the new Cirque Du Soleil show is Michael Jackson themed, and it is going to tour the United States. It's coming to Utah on November 29, 2011 (I think). I have to go.

Hold your breath ladies and gentleman. This is all just going to be way too much fun.

Dodge Barrage Mirage 2010.

2010-10-24T16:54:00.000-07:00

This post is about a month overdue. The magnificent event occurred on September 18, 2010. My big brother's 25th birthday.

Throughout the day my brother was known to proclaim, repeatedly, "THIS IS THE BEST BIRTHDAY EVER!"

And well, it should be.

Andrew and his friends organized a dodgeball team to compete at the Dodge Barrage, a tournament sponsored by Deron Williams and Kyle Korver for some unknown charity. It was a big tournament all day that culminated into the championship in the afternoon. Andrew's team made it into the top 8, which is pretty good, out of more than 64 teams. BUT, the championship game was played between an all-star lineup of:

Deron Williams
Kyle Korver
Al Jefferson
Ronnie Price
And lots of these four professional athletes' friends

(I have to add that the Jazz team wore light blue ghostbusters T-shirts, little red shorts, and red sweatbands around their heads. And tall tube socks with their sneakers. They were cool.)

And these guys:

Yep. This team of rag-and-tag 80's styled Dodgeball professionals, flown in from the exotic land of California. Their shirts literally say on them, "The Charles Bronson Make a Death Wish Foundation." And the back of their shirts say, "Dodgeball4life.com" Check it out.

But guess. who. won.

The latter.

That is probably my favorite thing that happened all day.

Oh, and also this thing:

Deron Williams. With the fam.

We went to dinner afterward for Andrew's birthday:

Andrew and Mallory have now been married for a year. Woohoo!

After dinner we all drove back to Provo. Andrew and Mal stayed at Stephanie's house, so me and Elise met everyone there. We watched "Dodgeball" (an appropriate choice after the day's festivities) and ate brownies and ice cream- more birthday celebration.

I just remember that all day, we all kept repeating, "this is SO MUCH FUN!" Cause seriously, one could not have predicted how much fun it is to watch a dodgeball game. It's really fun, okay?

My Aunt Judy, cousin Nicole, and Grandpa Don and Grandma Karen all joined us at different times during the day, and fun was had by all. AND, the Dew Tour was going on at Energy Solutions, and we were at the Salt Palace, so I was able to go and visit Rachelle and Brad at the Dew Tour just after they got engaged!

It was a great day, and seriously, I a little bit love dodgeball now.

Can I be a Michael Jordan fan too? Cause this is awesome.

2010-10-21T23:46:00.001-07:00

Me, a BYU grad?

2010-10-21T10:32:00.000-07:00

Just moments ago, I applied for graduation from Brigham Young University.

I will walk on April 22, 2011. Convocation will be on April 21.

Literally 6 months from today, I will no longer be a student at the BYU.

It's tragic because I love this place so much, but it's kind of exciting.

And I'm freaking out a little bit.

"It's mine. I bought it."

2010-10-12T15:52:00.000-07:00

Quoted: Justin Bieber

I share his sentiment. In this funnyordie.com video, he buys a club so he can do whatever he wants with it. That just happens to be turning it into a Chuckie Cheese. Noble decision.

So I realized today that it actually really bugs me when people take my candy. Well, not just people, but boys that already bother me and then they take my candy without asking. Why would I notice this trend? How is it possible that it would have happened to me enough times that this would register on the list of Audrey's pet peeves?

Well, it only had to happen twice.

1. In 9th grade, students were given a candy bar for their birthday in seminary. On my birthday, I was super stoked to receive a Snickers bar, my favorite favorite candy bar. I opened the package and took one delectable bite. Then, it was time for the prayer. I folded my arms, still holding the candy bar in my fist, bowed my head, and closed my eyes for the prayer. During said prayer, my candy bar was STOLEN out of my hand, bitten off of, and placed back in my fist. And this was all before the prayer was over. I looked behind me to see my nemesis: an unnamed rude boy and graduate from Dixie High School, class of 2006. A boy who when I think of him, still puts a bad taste in my mouth. I had to break off another large piece of my candy bar to get his cooties off it, and was left with less than half a candy bar. And I had only been able to take one bite. I was seriously annoyed. And angry.

2. Today I brought mini Reeses Peanut Butter Cups to my practicum class for part of the lesson I had to teach. I left the bag open on my desk when I went up to the front of the room to get something, and when I came back, the obnoxious, too-smart-for-everyone boy that sits in front of me was EATING A REESES! I actually gave him a stern, annoyed look, took the bag from off my desk and placed it in my backpack, away from stupid boy who thought it was okay to steal my candy. Not okay.

Unreasonable? I think not.

So annoying, candy stealer boys: Remember, the candy is mine. I bought it.

My current choice of study music:

2010-10-11T20:05:00.000-07:00

Hot Space by Queen. 1982.

Favorite track: "Cool Cat"

I bought this album and kind of didn't like it. After about the 4th run-through I fell in love.

I listen to it in a loop while I study. It's fantastic.

PS, there is a boy in my ward who reminds me of Freddie Mercury so much that every time I see him I am tempted to tell him to grow a bushy mustache. I always refrain.

Season Opener.

2010-10-10T22:20:00.000-07:00

November 12.

One month and one day.

And I will be at the Marriott Center, two hours early, anxiously awaiting the arrival of this man:

And the rest of the team of course.

I love BYU basketball. So much.

My lovely Sugarpop.

2010-10-08T17:08:00.000-07:00

I call my little sister Moriah a mixture of names: Mojo, Baby Jo, Sugarpop, Sugardoll, Banjo...

Some recent things about Moriah that reminded me of how amazing she is:

1. For the past month, literally every night before she goes to bed, she texts each of her siblings and says something to the extent of: "Good night best sister in the world! Sleep so neat!" or "I love you so so so much! Sleep so nifty!" The girl is hilarious/awesome/sweet.
2. She just turned 15 and got her young womanhood recognition award. As a reward, the 5 or 6 girls in the stake who got their award at the same time got to go up for Saturday general conference in the Conference Center, AND they got to go to President Uchtdorf's office and meet him. What a dream, right? Needless to say, Moriah loved it.
3. She is an excellent student and is involved in several clubs at the middle school. She's on the GYC council and in NJHS, played tennis at the high school this past year, and goes to drama class up at the high school with Mr. Saxton every other day. She wants to be involved in everything.
4. On Friday when I was in St. George I saw Mr. Saxton and talked to him for a bit. He commented on Moriah and how great she is. He said, though, that he asked her to take a part in a short scene from "Much Ado About Nothing" at the Shakespeare festival competition because the girl who was going to take the part dropped out. Moriah had said she didn't think she could memorize the lines fast enough and told him no. So I said to Mr. Saxton, "you want me to tell her to do it? If I'll tell her, she'll do it." (I recognize my authority...) He nodded and said that was a great idea. So when I saw Moriah, I made my proposition and told her she should do it. It took some coaxing, but I convinced her that it wouldn't be that hard. Together, we identified the scene she was to learn, and the part, and printed off 2 copies of the script (it's a good thing I know that play so well. All Moriah had to do was tell me that Beatrice and Margaret were in the scene and that Margaret said something about "heels"). Then, between sessions of conference on Sunday, we went on a walk around the neighborhood and read lines. I prompted her and explained the scene to her, and together, we memorized the scene. It was a lot of fun. Later that day, she came to me and said, "Audrey, thanks for helping me remember that I'm not just a regular student. I'm an overachiever too."

Could anything be sweeter? Could I have done a better job on my little protege?

I love this sweet girl more than I can say. And I'm so proud to be her big sister.

And also, I just have to say, Moriah is the reason that I still love the Jonas Brothers, Hannah Montana, High School Musical, and Sonny With a Chance. Well, maybe not the only reason, but a big reason.

Footloose

2010-10-06T12:01:00.000-07:00

Been listening to this soundtrack on a loop for the past couple days. I forgot how much I love Footloose. It was an 8th grade obsession of mine.

Also, I had a crush on Kevin Bacon as an 8-year-old watching Apollo 13.

Below is the cover for the album version that I wish I was cool enough to have.

And you know what's so great about this soundtrack? Classic songs. "Let's Hear it For the Boy" "Holding Out For A Hero" and "Footloose." Or my favorite, "I'm Free." Kenny Loggins. And seriously, this soundtrack is like a mix of Prince, Queen, Heart, and honestly, a little bit of Michael. Some funky stuff, some classic 80s rock with hot male voices or strong, deeper female voices, and some deep bass lines. And there's one song that reminds me of the Goofy movie song, "Stand Out." What could possibly be greater?

4 weeks into school.

2010-10-04T19:31:00.000-07:00

(this is an old post-- I wrote it about two weeks ago and felt it wasn't complete quite yet, so I didn't post it. But now it's old and irrelevant. I'm posting it anyway)

This is my last semester and I feel like I have a million decisions to make.

Movies to watch:
1. Kiss Kiss Bang Bang
2. Me and Orson Welles (it should have come from Netflix TODAY!) I've been waiting for this for like 2 years. I can proudly admit that I have been watching Zac Efron's IMDB page for updates on all his movies, including this one. For two years.

My new favorite song: Just A Dream by Nelly. When I heard that song I gasped with happiness. I don't know, it just felt right to have him singing to me, like I was brought back to happy teenage days of Country Grammar, Ride Wit Me, Over and Over, and Dilemma. And yes, Grillz. Just keep singing, Nelly, and keep providing me with clean versions.

30Rock started yesterday. Paul, Rachelle, and Brad came over for the event.

Rachelle and Brad are now betrothed. They got engaged last weekend, and it's already on her blog, so I figured I could say something about it here. But I am SO happy about this. I couldn't have asked for a better man to give my Rachelle away to. And seriously, he has adorned her left ring finger with a solid, whole carat diamond. A girl can only be so lucky. I think lovingly back to the day of Senior Showoff when Rachelle glided down from the ceiling of the auditorium in a slinky green dress singing, "Diamonds Are a Girl's Best Friend."

A couple of weeks ago I was told by my good friend Christopher that he had met two new people in our ward who LOVED Michael Jackson. One boy and one girl. I knew from that moment that I had to find those people. First, because I could use that commonality to bond with them, and second, because I had to assess how big of fans they were. What exactly were they claiming, you know? Well, last night I met them. We were all three excited, and immediately the boy, Marcus, asked me what my favorite song was. I said that currently, but not of all-time, my favorites were "Keep the Faith" and "Speechless." He looked at me blankly. So did the girl. Neither of them knew those songs. I WON.

Don't worry, I'm still the master Michael fan in the ward, and I have yet to be threatened in the Provo area. (Except for that one Australian rugby player who knows more about MJ than I do. He's the champion. But he's also foreign so that doesn't really count).

So I have a question. Why do people claim to be big fans of someone or something if they haven't done the proper research? Preposterous.

Today.

2010-10-04T19:29:00.000-07:00

I successfully made it to school and back twice without slipping on the wet, rainy ground.
I found out that in Hungarian, "agy," pronounced, "audge" means "brain." I hope that's significant.
They used 42 piglets in the filming of Babe.
I decided what I want to be for Halloween while sitting in my LDS Marriage and Family class today while listening to a lecture on "Dating vs. Hanging out."
I worked EXTRA hours today, and I finished rehousing a collection that I have been working on since July. I still have to encode it and do the last minute processing things, but then I will be DONE. FINALLY. This current collection might be my least favorite ever. And guess what I get to work on next? The George Romney papers. He's practically Mormon American royalty.
I reaffirmed my opinion of boots today. They are still ugly.
Sarie made some delicious soup, and I think she is a miracle.
We played "Don't Eat Pete" in FHE. It's my favorite game from my 7-year-old Primary class. We played it after the lesson when we were good primary kids.
I watched an episode of Friends and laughed out loud probably 16 times.
I woke up early to finish homework.
I have checked my email a mere 6 times. That's unusually low.
I didn't even complain when my shoes got soaked through while walking in the rain.

Yesterday.

Lene posted 4 new albums on Facebook (that makes her facebook album total 96. that girl is out of control. but I love it), and when I checked my email, I had notifications for 46 new pictures tagged of me. So. Check them out. Feel free to avoid the video she posted.
I got back from St. George late last night after enjoying a weekend with my family, conference, and the 100 degree sun. It was heavenly. I even got to go to a Dixie High football game. (And can I just say, I don't remember high school boys being that small).
It was the first time that I had gone home for a St. George weekend and honestly did not want to go back to Provo. I was seriously in no rush to come back. I don't know. I might be getting over it a little bit-- which is good, because I'm graduating soon and I will probably not be staying in Provo for another year. Or maybe I just miss my summer ward. I loved those guys.

A mix.

2010-10-03T21:51:00.000-07:00

A quick something.

JK Rowling was recently on Oprah. I meant to watch it (because I always know when she has an appearance coming up), but unfortunately, I forgot. But, I caught the recap. And with the help of my friend Liz, I found this out:

1. Quoted from a news report: "Fans, rejoice -- J.K. Rowling offered a bit of hope on Friday that, perhaps, the final Harry Potter story has yet to be told. "I could definitely write an eighth, ninth, tenth," the celebrated author, 45, told Oprah Winfrey during an interview scheduled to air Friday. "I'm not going to say I won't. I don't think I will ... I feel I am done, but you never know."

My reaction: You know I love Harry Potter. But. I don't think there should be more. However, if the brilliant Ms. Rowling things there should be more, well then, there should be. I trust the woman.

2. Quoted from the same article: "However, Rowling mentioned that she did turn down one opportunity -- when Michael Jackson said he wanted to make a musical based on the books."

My reaction: I'M SORRY. WHAT??!? I had heard the rumors about a musical, but it was never public knowledge until Friday that it was MICHAEL JACKSON'S IDEA!!!! Now, I'm not sure that those two things- Harry Potter and Michael Jackson- should EVER EVER mix, but STILL!! Imagine the possibilities. WORLDS COLLIDE!

Here's the article if ya wanna read it:
http://www.cnn.com/2010/SHOWBIZ/celebrity.news.gossip/10/01/more.harry.potter.ppl/index.html?eref=rss_showbiz&utm_source=feedburner&utm_medium=feed&utm_campaign=Feed%3A+rss%2Fcnn_showbiz+%28RSS%3A+Entertainment%29

And another one about Michael's idea:
http://timesofindia.indiatimes.com/world/uk/J-K-Rowling-rejected-Michael-Jacksons-idea-of-Harry-Potter-musical/articleshow/6670974.cms

Neither are very informative, but it's the best we can do. Very little information available.

Adios.

And this is why we study history.

2010-09-30T16:51:00.000-07:00

http://abcnews.go.com/International/germany-makes-final-reparation-payments-world-war/story?id=11755920&page=1

Read this article.

Title: Germany makes final World War I reparation payments

Remember in your high school history classes when your teacher (Mr. Wegkamp) taught you about World War I and how through the Treaty of Versailles, France and Great Britain punished Germany by requiring them to pay them for their losses? There was a set amount, and it was SO high and SO demanding, that it crippled Germany into a state even worse than they had been after a world war had ravaged their people, cities, economy, political systems, and countryside. It caused economic devastation while the world was on the brink of depression anyway.

The article explains that the German government stopped paying around 1931, and then Hitler came into power and it was a surprise to nobody that he also refused to pay. Instead, massive amounts of interest on the reparations accrued, and when the Berlin Wall fell the country started paying the interest. The debt will be paid off completely on October 3, 2010.

Quoted from the article: "It's a historical curiosity that the Versailles Treaty should continue to have a financial impact to this day," Professor Gerd Krumeich, a German historian who has specialized in the World War I, told SPIEGEL ONLINE.

It's a miracle, that's what it is. And do you see how the history that we learned about in school still affects our lives? While there are only three known World War 1 vets still living, the consequences of the war are still being seen by the German, French, and British people. Can you believe that?

This is why I love history.